Random Thoughts...

[anglewitch]

Oro se do bheatha bhaile

[LuvablePsycho]

Regardless that was still a bit rude. I mean the last time he came on here he was talking about his girlfriend breaking up with him and while he didn't act like it was the end of the world or anything but he was still a little bummed. Bloof and I were just congratulating him as he seemed happy with His new car and girlfriend. Why would you feel the need to turn a positive conversation into such a negative one?

I hate it that you are having problems at home but I am going to tell you the exact same thing I told ML12, Don't take your personal issues out on others here. This is where we go to escape the everyday bullshit and come together in a peaceful environment and when people come in here using their own personal problems to fuel the way they act in here it just makes things and unnecessary drawn out shitshow that all of us try to avoid. I'm not trying to be rude or anything with you but seriously, chill out man. I mean I am going to be blunt here, you scream of someone who is trying their damnedest to get attention from anyone here. I mean the other day on Thanksgiving you were telling us about how you had dinner but your mom had to leave to take somebody to the hospital but then just randomly say you have been alone for weeks. I hate that for you but what do you want us to do about it? I mean I get that you want friends and you're antisocial and it is tough for you to socialize with others oh, believe me, I was once there myself, but you seriously come off too strong no matter what it is you're trying to talk about your and I can't speak for others that I already told you how it made me feel I want to be your friend but seriously, aggressive attitude.

My mom is thinking about getting back with her psycho crackead exhusband again and I'm thinking about shoving a kitchen knife in his heart and I don't care if I go to prison for it.

There. I said it. It had nothing to do with any of you guys.

[anglewitch]

My mom is thinking about getting back with her psycho crackead exhusband again and I'm thinking about shoving a kitchen knife in his heart and I don't care if I go to prison for it.

There. I said it. It had nothing to do with any of you guys.
Dude, you have got to be more careful as to what you say online, even if it is a joke, or "just saying". Next thing you know police will be kicking down your door. I know that sounds stupid, but that shit does happen.

[Morningriser]

She sure is a beauty. Green eyes, and the best smile you can ever ask for. She is perhaps the most compassionate woman i have ever met. Of course i was immediately love struck by her considering that she is a leo and i am a pisces. Even though cats and fish are mortal enemies in real life, the zodiac says otherwise. The food she cooks is real good too.
Oh btw, my phone which i am using right now was run over by a ton and a half truck at work yesterday. Still works, not even a scratch on the screen. It was ran over on gravel too.

Trac phone
Aka
Tac phone
As seen on tv. Only 19.99. Comes with life time warrenty. But don't stop, call now using our promo code butthole and get two tac phones.

I'm happy for you man I'm happy for you man. Know if only I could figure out what's going on with these chicks I'm talking to you haha

[LuvablePsycho]

Dude, you have got to be more careful as to what you say online. Next thing you know police will be kicking down your door. I know that sounds stupid, but that shit does happen.

Frankly I don't give a shit. Fuck everybody! And don't thinm I'm not serious either.

[Morningriser]

But yeah, seriously. All the crazy shit that's going on there's all these new search engines that are set up to constantly monitor everything in anytime certain keywords pop up it could potentially prompt some sort of Investigation into the source. I know it sounds fucked up but they have to do fuckedupshit in order to try to keep up with the constant threats going on in and outside the country. But dude you are treading on thin ice continuing on like this man.

Let's say by some weird coincidence they did see that you said that and something actually did happen to him, who do you think would be the prime suspect?

[anglewitch]

I'm happy for you man I'm happy for you man. Know if only I could figure out what's going on with these chicks I'm talking to you haha

Sure, i will give you tips sometime.

[LuvablePsycho]

Whatever. I'm finished with everybody.

[anglewitch]

But yeah, seriously. All the crazy shit that's going on there's all these new search engines that are set up to constantly monitor everything in anytime certain keywords pop up it could potentially prompt some sort of Investigation into the source. I know it sounds fucked up but they have to do fuckedupshit in order to try to keep up with the constant threats going on in and outside the country. But dude you are treading on thin ice continuing on like this man.
He is right psycho. Happened to a guy i knew once.

[anglewitch]

Whatever. I'm finished with everybody.
You can lead a jackass to water but you cant make him drink.

[Morningriser]

Facebook uses this Technology to keep tabs on drug and other illegal pages and groups from never getting off the ground but my point is if Facebook has that kind of Technology, what would that say about the US government? That old saying, big brother is always watching, is more accurate now than it has ever been before in human history.

[Morningriser]

You can lead a jackass to water but you cant make him drink.

I told you, he just wants attention. I'm tired of being nice and Ultra sensitive to this guy. He's a fucking creep. I thought we were going to be friends on PS4 and play games but it turns out he doesn't even have games or a upgraded account to play games online but he just sat on it all day messaging me on there over the exact same things we were all talking about in the random thoughts thread here and he was also private messaging me here on the website over the same stuff he was talking to me about here and on PS4 so I couldn't take it anymore and I told him to chill out but then he disappeared for a few days and I started to feel guilty for coming off so harsh But now all he is doing is throwing a temper tantrum. I have my own fucking life and the rest of us do here too and there's only so much we can do. Again, psycho, I'm sorry you were having a shity life but We aren't going to sit here and pamper you and give you playful pets on the butt and cater to your every damn whim like you are a child. We are all adults here and I'm being this blunt and straightforward with you to get my point across. You are an attention whore. There's no other way around it and I refuse to sugarcoat it. People can get mad at me if they want I really don't give a damn. I'd rather be honest and people hate me then be a liar and people adore me because it's my way of letting myself no I haven't lost control of who I am.

[anglewitch]

I agree mr.
I gave up helping people like lp cuz they pull shit like this, and they typically tell you to fuck off.
Unfortunately there is too many people like lp in the world today, and that is why the world sucks. I found it hard to find women that dont act like lp, my last and current girlfriend are complete and total god sents. But that is beside the point. The only time i even talk about killing online is when i bag a deer in the woods, when its season of course.
People like lp are broken, and there's no point in trying to fix 'em.
Just best to ignore their messages and pretend that they are not there. This suffocates the troller.

If I was a mod, i would ban someone if they started talking about murdering someone. It would probably be the only thing i would do for them to save an ass.

[Morningriser]

Something is happening to the human race. Like we are becoming socially retarded for a lack of a better term or just ignorant to certain things. And everything all throughout history, but now that the population of the world is so large there are so many different people of all types no two people are exactly the same. I think somewhere down the line something happened and throughout centuries of millions and millions and billions of new generations coming and going, hereditary disorders take over and get passed down and bred into completely other bloodlines. Somewhere down the line I think we poisoned ourselves and it's just a matter of time before we are extinct. In the big picture it is inevitable. All Empires fall and ours has lasted 500 years. Getting close to being about that time isn't it?

[LuvablePsycho]

I really am sorry about what I said but you guys have no fucking idea what I'm going through right now. And now I know how you guys really feel about me.

Morningriser I guess you're absolutely right about me and I'm sorry.

I hate myself right now.

[anglewitch]

Saw this big ass owl yesterday. Had a dead squirrel in it's beak.

[LuvablePsycho]

Yeah I get it. I deserve to be ignored.

[Morningriser]

Shut the hell up and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Do you realize how many times you have thrown that tired-ass cliche at us about how we don't know what you are going through? No we don't know what you are going through but do you have any idea what I have went through? at least you have a fucking mother. Mine drink herself to death after my father died and no one to this day knows if he killed himself or was murdered because he was involved in a lot of bad shit with a lot of bad people and yes it fucked me up bad and I know everyone deals with things differently but I have had a lot of really fucked up tragic things happen in my life that I am still working on two extents but I realized that sitting around posting shit like that feeling sorry for yourself Scares people away. I learned that the hard way. it sounds like you just stay locked up in your room all day and don't do fuck all except get on here and sit or get on PS4 and do whatever it is you do When you should be getting out and meeting people and making friends. It's something you have to force yourself to do in the beginning but then overtime you will find it easier and easier and you will gain confidence.

that's all I have left to offer

[anglewitch]

Yeah I get it. I deserve to be ignored.

Bíonn tú ag ithe cairteacha cat.

[cheebacheeba]

Dude, you have got to be more careful as to what you say online, even if it is a joke, or "just saying". Next thing you know police will be kicking down your door. I know that sounds stupid, but that shit does happen.

It *has* happened. Here.

[LuvablePsycho]

I'm not going to kill anybody.

[Morningriser]

It *has* happened. Here.

Here on the board or there at your house? That's fucked up!

[anglewitch]

Shut the hell up and stop feeling sorry for yourself. Do you realize how many times you have thrown that tired-ass cliche at us about how we don't know what you are going through? No we don't know what you are going through but do you have any idea what I have went through? at least you have a fucking mother. Mine drink herself to death after my father died and no one to this day knows if he killed himself or was murdered because he was involved in a lot of bad shit with a lot of bad people and yes it fucked me up bad and I know everyone deals with things differently but I have had a lot of really fucked up tragic things happen in my life that I am still working on two extents but I realized that sitting around posting shit like that feeling sorry for yourself Scares people away. I learned that the hard way. it sounds like you just stay locked up in your room all day and don't do fuck all except get on here and sit or get on PS4 and do whatever it is you do When you should be getting out and meeting people and making friends. It's something you have to force yourself to do in the beginning but then overtime you will find it easier and easier and you will gain confidence.

that's all I have left to offer

Just in case you dont understand that lp.
He is saying that, he didnt stick his thumb up his ass and whine woe is me. He got off it and started doing not saying.
I go through hard shit too. Not as bad as mr here, sorry to hear that about your fam mr.

columbus didn't discover america sitting on his ass playing nintendo all day. Sure i lost my gf and a car almost in one go, but since i go out and do i get what i lose back again. Like the gaelic, german, and russian shit i say on here. I didn't learn all that being A damn couch potato.

[cheebacheeba]

Here on the board.
Someone called Freddyfan made similar statements and was apprehended and found with knives etc.

I'm not going to have this place be birthplace to some bullshit tragedy so we officially stop talking about this now.
I have ran this by the mods located closer to you - I'm over in Australia so...how they choose to act on it is up to them.

Personal issues between members should not be brought up on the public board either...regardless of your mood at the time...that's the kind of shit that makes situations like this worse.

This conversation finishes here.
Not one more fucking post about it.

[anglewitch]

That is what happened to ff?
Daaamn.

[Morningriser]

I don't know if I remember him from here or not but that user name sounds very familiar. Also been a member on what he disgusting, upcoming horror movies, horror movie fans and a few other forums over the last 18 or so years so it's hard to tell. Maybe I'm just mistaken all together.

Have you heard anything else about this guy since then cheeba?

[anglewitch]

Nevermind. Didn't know Freddyfan, Mistook him for my old english bud Teddy Freddy. Funny guy, vanished though.

[anglewitch]

BEER!!!

[LuvablePsycho]

https://i.imgur.com/uASx13d.gif

[Morningriser]

so it turns out this girl I was talking to you here in Vegas is just another loser without the courtesy of telling me she isn't interested despite telling me to my face she wanted to see me again. I don't know if I should laugh or just feel totally downright depressed at how miserable and spineless some people truly are.

A hot romantic European fling is actually sounding a whole lot better right now ::big grin::

[LuvablePsycho]

I ate a bowl of oatmeal this morning.

[anglewitch]

so it turns out this girl I was talking to you here in Vegas is just another loser without the courtesy of telling me she isn't interested despite telling me to my face she wanted to see me again. I don't know if I should laugh or just feel totally downright depressed at how miserable and spineless some people truly are.

A hot romantic European fling is actually sounding a whole lot better right now ::big grin::

Euro women are probably the best thing that will happen to you.

[Morningriser]

Did you see the pictures I posted of her though? I mean she is exquisite. She's that kind of girl that could get practically any guy she wants but she just want someone to talk to her and be nice to her rather than just wanting sex out of her although she does seem to oblige to those people as well but I think that's just for her own personal fun.

[anglewitch]

Up early for work.
Whoopee.::roll eyes::

[Morningriser]

Damnable lies! you never went to bed did you? You've been up with that picture ever since haven't you? ::big grin::

[Dead Bad Things]

WhoaYeah! I'm back from partyin' my ass off for the past four days. ::smile::
I drank a liter of gin to myself..along with various other party favors. ::cool::

[anglewitch]

Damnable lies! you never went to bed did you? You've been up with that picture ever since haven't you? ::big grin::

I seriously didnt see it coming.
No pun intended btw.

[Morningriser]

That ass could start and end Wars.

[Morningriser]

I'm starting to think Hollywood is about ready to go belly-up. I mean if they are seriously having to resort to making movies about cities that drive around on wheels Then something is seriously wrong with reality.

[anglewitch]

I'm starting to think Hollywood is about ready to go belly-up. I mean if they are seriously having to resort to making movies about cities that drive around on wheels Then something is seriously wrong with reality.

People have been stupid for the last 30 years.

Everyone on the world sucked down on three tubes of tooth paste at once.

[Dead Bad Things]

Media is not a mirror.

[Morningriser]

Media is not a mirror.
Well if you can't do blow off of it what's the point then? ::big grin::

But seriously, this movie looked like it was really expensive to make judging by the things I saw in just the trailer. So if they are going to put that kind of money into a movie, you would think they would try to put at least a little more effort into it then getting the guy that is narrating the trailer to use a really cheesy voice like he was pushing a mobile app game or something. I mean I wasn't sure if it was a movie trailer or a commercial for Clash of Clans or League of Legends or some shit. I just don't understand who comes up with the idea that shit like this might be interesting. I mean it might make some money but I seriously think this thing is going to flop. And to be honest with you I kind of hope it does. This has to be one of the most ridiculous movie ideas I have ever seen." Oh no everyone! London is driving right for us we better run and go try to catch a lift from Paris before they drive off to visit Uganda". that's the logic I am hearing in this.

[Morningriser]

has anyone heard from LP since the other day? I can't help but worry about the guy even if he does have his problems. I mean I was there once and he means well he just isn't very good at connecting socially. I just hope he didn't do something foolish like hurt himself or someone else.

[Bloof]

has anyone heard from LP since the other day? I can't help but worry about the guy even if he does have his problems. I mean I was there once and he means well he just isn't very good at connecting socially. I just hope he didn't do something foolish like hurt himself or someone else.

While I haven't heard from him, I'm sure he's good. Probably just taking a break to do some thinking.

[Morningriser]

I can't help but to feel a little responsible, but to respect cheeba' s wishes, I will leave it at that.

[Bloof]

Because he's spoken openly about this himself, i will too. I suspect his meds just got the best of him for a bit. Right, Luvs?

[Morningriser]

I think someone might have just tried to abduct me.

So I was just walking through the parking lot here at my apartment complex and some guy started creep driving slowly along side right behind me so I finally stopped and started looking at him and he pulled into a parking space and got my attention. He asked me if I was by chance disabled so I say yes and he says he would give me $20 take me out to lunch if I would sign a paper that he then pulls out of his pocket that is folded in fours and if he could take me to a therapist...

I know i am a sweet piece of ass but if he wants to drug and rape me he is going to have to try harder than that. I am a high-class hoe.

Obviously I told him to fuck off and started walking away and the next thing I heard was his tires screeching out onto the highway. I really wasn't thinking because the question caught me so off guard but I should have said no when he first asked if I was disabled.

[Morningriser]

Actually after giving it some thought, maybe the guy just thought I was homeless and was legitimately trying to help me. I mean there are always homeless people wandering the complex dumpster diving for cans and other things they can sell. maybe he just made an assumption, which is kind of weird considering he never asked me if I was homeless. I'm thinking that would be a little more logical then getting kidnapped ::big grin::

[Bloof]

I dunno, Morning. That sounds a little off to me. I might have considered reporting him. Maybe he got somebody else. You never know. And why did he ask you if you were disabled? Weird.

[cheebacheeba]

He was probably trying to get himself signed up as your caretaker or some shit. Like free money from the govt - they do that there too, right?
Least he could have done was offer you an ongoing cut...

I've spoken to LP as well. I'm not about to go into it, but he knows he's welcome here and I've advised like I would you all, that he focuses on moving forward.
He's spoken to me and I'm not currently convinced he intends to harm himself or other people.
I'm sure he'll find the concern encouraging.

[Morningriser]

I'm glad he's alright. I mean I can also fly off the handle if I'm having a stressful day or time as I'm sure most of you have noticed. That was particularly a bad day for me because I found out the intentions of that girl that came and hung out with me that night I was telling you guys about and it just rubbed me the wrong way.

I don't think the guy was trying to abduct me. I mean it was broad daylight in a parking lot directly adjacent to Charleston Boulevard which is a pretty busy street in Vegas, like all streets pretty much. I started thinking and I figured that he probably thought I was homeless or what Cheeba says makes sense. I mean first he asked me if I was disabled and I said yes and then he asked me if I was on Social Security. Probably pulled out of the parking lot the way he did because I might have pissed him off or something I don't know but I'm pretty sure I wasn't in any kind of danger. I mean Las Vegas is very good to the disabled out here so maybe his intentions were good, I don't know.

[DR. DOOM]

Thought i would crack open the ol spam doom profile today. Lol.

[Bloof]

Thought i would crack open the ol spam doom profile today. Lol.

I remember you, "Dr. Doom". ::big grin::

[DR. DOOM]

I remember you, "Dr. Doom". ::big grin::

And i don't remember you.
"bloof" ::stick out tongue::

[Morningriser]

And i don't remember you.
"bloof" ::stick out tongue::

All right buddy, considering your post count, the amount of time you've been a member here, and using the word spam like you did, I find you highly suspect.

[hammerfan]

All right buddy, considering your post count, the amount of time you've been a member here, and using the word spam like you did, I find you highly suspect.

Relax, we know who it is

[Morningriser]

I did actually mean to put a laughing face after that and I came back to do that but you replied already.

[DR. DOOM]

Relax, we know who it is


Shackleford
....
Rusty Shackleford.

[Morningriser]

Shackleford
....
Rusty Shackleford.

Holy shit! I remember you! What are the boards have you been on because I'm not sure it was this one. Or was it?

[MovieLover12]

Relax, we know who it is

I'll take the blame, although I've done nothing wrong. ::big grin::

[Morningriser]

https://media.giphy.com/media/6OWIl75ibpuFO/giphy.gif

[MovieLover12]

I guess my attempts at being a comedian are in need of refinement. ::big grin::

[Morningriser]

I was just preparing myself ::big grin::

[Bloof]

I guess my attempts at being a comedian are in need of refinement. ::big grin::

Geez, i just now noticed that you've been here since 2009.

[Morningriser]

At first I thought that said you just noticed him for the first time since 2009. ::big grin::

[Dead Bad Things]

::big grin::::big grin::::big grin::
Y'all got me rollin'!
ML12 What up homes?

The library just called....I got the new Stephen King novel ::smile::
It's called Elevation. Takes place down in ol' Castle Rock ::devil::

[Morningriser]

Last Stephen King book I attempted was Doctor Sleep, which coincidentally came out on my birthday. When it comes to Long stories I prefer audio books as my eyes. I absolutely love The Shining. I preferred the movie over the book, despite Stephen King hating it. For about 3 or 4 chapters of doctor sleep. It made me think rather than him having a real story to tell, he was just trying to cash in on one of his most popular novels ever. Just seems like he doesn't have it like you used used to, but I guess that just comes with age and writing for so long. I mean I'm sure at this point it's very difficult for him to come up with fresh new ideas as easily as he used to.

[MovieLover12]

::big grin::::big grin::::big grin::
Y'all got me rollin'!
ML12 What up homes?

The library just called....I got the new Stephen King novel ::smile::
It's called Elevation. Takes place down in ol' Castle Rock ::devil::

Hey Dead Bad Things, I've just been around, still watching old horror movies and trying to catch up. There's so much stuff and I've gotten the first four Amityville's in the bag recently!

[Morningriser]

I like the first Amityville but I just couldn't get into the others. The Remake had really cool effects but otherwise I didn't see much need for it.

[anglewitch]

Holy shit! I remember you! What are the boards have you been on because I'm not sure it was this one. Or was it?


You have not seen me for i was not here


Oh shit the game is up.

[Morningriser]

That was you? I do remember that name though. I'm not talking about from King of the Hill either, I'm talking about from a message board.

and why are you printing office read that was last posted in 12 years ago? ::big grin::

[anglewitch]

I have a 3rd profile. Can anyone find it?

[Morningriser]

If it's in your butt I don't want to find it. I'm sure DBT would look though ::big grin::

[Bloof]

If it's in your butt I don't want to find it. I'm sure DBT would look though ::big grin::

Betcha he wouldn't.

[Morningriser]

Betcha he wouldn't.

I bet if there was a money involved he would ::big grin::

I hate Bob's Burgers with every fiber of my being. Every time it is on and I hear Linda or Tina speak, it makes me cringe, especially when Linda makes stupid noises and Tina makes that stupid sound when she exhales nervously. I like the guy that does the voice of Bob but as far as the rest of it goes, just cancel that fucking shit already please.

Sorry... I just needed to verbally express my hatred for that show. I feel better now.

[anglewitch]

Sorry, not even for money friend. You can save yourself some money by looking for yourself though.
Besides, dbt stunk up my pub yesterday.::big grin::::stick out tongue::

[Dead Bad Things]

Y'all got jokes huh?

[Morningriser]

Y'all got jokes huh?

What do Dale Earnhardt, Pink Floyd and Princess Diana all have in common?

their last hit was the wall

[MovieLover12]

I thought Diana's car hit the concrete piller last.

[Morningriser]

she still hit a wall party pooper and if you don't like that version of my joke, if you ever decide to retail that you can just take her out of it and leave the other two.

[MovieLover12]

Absolutely, the car hit the tunnel wall and ended up hitting one of the pillers in the centre before coming to a stop.

[cheebacheeba]

Like, what was the last thing to go through her brain before she died?
The windshield.

[Morningriser]

::big grin:: That was fucking great!

[MovieLover12]

Like, what was the last thing to go through her brain before she died?
The windshield.

That's very unlikely as she was still alive when the medics turned up, and a brain injury, had it occurred is more likely to lead to instant death.

[anglewitch]

Why the heck is my ex girlfriend still texting me? I don't get it. I didn't dump her she dumped me. Wtf is going on?

[anglewitch]

Found out why hdc is lacking newbies.
I saw all these people on the who is online list with the register.
I haven't seen a new name yet so I thought, I wonder.
I attempted to register a new profile to find the recaptcha anti spam bot has been shut down. So that is why, when you turn the sink on the toilet flushes.

[Morningriser]

I never realized how much life LP brought to this place until he was gone. It's been dead as fuck around here without him.

[DeadbeatAtDawn]

Happy 70th Birthday Ozzy!

https://66.media.tumblr.com/3c56c10f39048d2932aee1a793f2af38/tumblr_pgy72agtVn1t55akg_400.gif
https://66.media.tumblr.com/3f99111c3c19a44e7e86adc6f5712eaa/tumblr_pgy72blEy41t55akg_400.gif
https://66.media.tumblr.com/a77600343b783533ddfad7d85d96e1a8/tumblr_pgy72eHJEr1t55akg_400.gif

[Dead Bad Things]

Wow! That's kinda hard to believe....Long live the King! ::devil::

[Morningriser]

I'm falling in love. I'm leaving it at that as people have used this kind of information against me in the past. But let's just say I am very happy right now :-)

[MovieLover12]

The closest I ever got was with a kept, married woman, who turned out to be an attention-seeking sociopath, who nearly lost her partner and his 50k a year wage when I blew the entire thing wide open.

[Morningriser]

Actually, I don't give a shit. What the lurkers lurk and jerk.

ML, you just have to have confidence and tell me. That shit radiates and everyone is empathic to an extent and they pick up on that. When you walk into a room you have to act like you own that motherfucker.

Anyway, this girl, name withheld of course, awesome! She is a gamer and a YouTuber and we are both falling hard for each other. We met a while back on a Rick and Morty fan page on Facebook. This is her and I think she is absolutely adorable.

[MovieLover12]

I'm a single guy that saw beautiful escorts on occasion until one day I woke up and discovered absolute heaven with the MGTOW - Men Go Their Own Way movement!

https://www.mgtow.com/

[Freak]

Where the hell is Luvable Psycho at? I feel like he hasn’t been on in awhile.

[Bloof]

Where the hell is Luvable Psycho at? I feel like he hasn’t been on in awhile.

He may very well be in the middle of moving. I think i remember something about him moving from one state to another before Xmas. ::confused::

[Morningriser]

I'm so fucking happy. It is so wonderful to feel something again.

[cheebacheeba]

I felt something today...

[hammerfan]

I felt something today...

Gas?

[Morningriser]

Did it hurt? ::big grin::

I'm going to assume you were talking about someone making you feel something, am I right? I am happy for you and I have started feeling something as well. I feel like I'm starting to fall in love again. It's a good feeling.

[Sculpt]

I felt something today...

What's that, Cheeb?

[BioLeng]

I don't know computer office programs. I study at the university, in a few weeks there will be a speech, I will prepare a speech and show a presentation on a computer. I have to make a PowerPoint presentation. Tell me, is it difficult? Or is it better to order such a presentation here https://edubirdie.com/powerpoint-presentations-writing-service? I have never encountered.

[Bloof]

I don't know computer office programs. I study at the university, in a few weeks there will be a speech, I will prepare a speech and show a presentation on a computer. I have to make a PowerPoint presentation. Tell me, is it difficult? I have never encountered.

Not sure about that sort of thing myself but good luck!

[Sculpt]

I don't know computer office programs. I study at the university, in a few weeks there will be a speech, I will prepare a speech and show a presentation on a computer. I have to make a PowerPoint presentation. Tell me, is it difficult? I have never encountered.
It's very easy. You just type into the screen-page, and can copy/paste pictures into as well.

[cheebacheeba]

I dunno. I was on acid...so whatever that was...

[Sculpt]

I dunno. I was on acid...so whatever that was...
So close to writing it down... ::big grin:: So how was the acid experience?

[Morningriser]

I dunno. I was on acid...so whatever that was...

You lucky ass mother fucker... I'm having trouble finding any kind of psychedelics and I live in Las fucking Vegas... ::big grin::

[MovieLover12]

I'm getting the feeling that cheebacheeba would like me a whole lot more if I went and took acid too.

[cheebacheeba]

So close to writing it down... So how was the acid experience?

It was...not bad.
I'm gonna white out the rest of the post so, Un-invisible it if you want to read about my use of an illicit substance:

I'd only ever tried LSD in this form once before, some 20 years ago.
To put a timeframe on it:
"Tomb Raider 2" had just came out on the original Playstation, my friend had just acquired a pirated copy.

It was a little piece of paper with a picture of a dolphin jumping in front of a rainbow.
At this time, all I had was 1/3 of one along with copious amounts of weed myself and friends went through at this stage in our lives.

My impression then was...kind of disappointing.
All it seemed to do was keep us up all night, so I guess it counteracted the weed fatigue a bit...and it made lights/TV screens kind of get a "halo" but that was it, and there was no real perception change or anything that I noticed.

I've tried actual mushrooms since, I have to say I prefer their effect.

This time?
It came my way kind of by surprise via my regular greenery supplier.
This isn't usually his range at all...
I'd just quit my job (there's some more random talk), so I felt like "whatever", and I grabbed some of these for me and my people.

They were (again) little pieces of paper.
These ones have mini black and white pictures of owls on them - kind of like similar art to what you see in those adult/stress relief colouring books.

Of course with a child myself and the wife can't do it together...so when the kid was asleep, the wife kind of "babysat" me while I had it.

I'd decided just to do half.
About 15 minutes later, I decided "fuck it" and dropped the other half.
Tasted like nothing.

After about a half hour, a warmth spread throughout my body, and sensations and movement became a little bit "fuzzy".
I got quite lazy/couchlocked.
I had some green vapes with the wife before anything really came on, and I TRIED to watch "Beavis and Butthead do America"...disappointingly my PS4 seems to have a problem with playing this particular DVD, so it got turned off.

The wife brought out this platter of mixed foods...nice.
We started watching this ridiculous Australian tv show called "Swift & Shift Couriers" which is just...so dumb...but of course as things were kicking in, I found it hilarious.

I'm don't recollect too greatly how the rest of the night went.
I remember I couldn't really eat anything other than the grapes that were on the platter.

The body FELT great, kind of like that feeling you get in/across your muscles before/during a stretching yawn, but all over, and constant.
Quite an intense, pleasant feeling.

Visually nothing leapt out at me. I didn't see anything that wasn't there already.

I felt happy.

Distances, space, shadows and lighting got played with in my perception, and occasionally I'd "think I saw something" move in the corner of my eye.

Had the same "halo" around lights etc as the last time.

When I got up and walked around, it kind of felt like my body was made of cement...though I didn't have any trouble moving around...it just felt like, wow, I am moving this very big/heavy object around.

The most viusual the effects got, was surfaces and textures.
Kind of similar to what happens when you look into that spinning vortex thing then look at something else?
Almost like things were pulsing and morphing.
I got the "breathing" effect from surfaces too, where it appears they are moving towards you then back.

I drank some water here and there, and I was very hot.
Apparently I felt like I was freezing though.
I had this quite late in the night, so the wife went to bed at some point after making sure I was good to go.

Later on while in the bathroom (went there because I felt everywhere else was hot), I looked at my eyes in the mirror in which my pupils were constantly adjusting, big, small, big, small...I was colour sensetive so every minor blemish on my skin showed. I ended up just thinking "I'm not doing this..."

I turned the lights off, and noticed this tiny little bug from the fern I keep in there flying about my shower screen. I knew it was just one of them, but I couldn't track it's movement right so it looked like about 10.
I looked up at the ceiling - and it almost seemed as though I saw a weird webbed surface over things...then I guess my imagination came into play a bit, I thought for a moment I was looking at a hatched nest of tiny spiders...in that, I could tell it wasn't but the impression the shadows and visual lack of focus was giving me.

Could not sleep.
At all.
I think I ended up sleeping maybe an hour fitfully before the next day.
Felt great after, despite the lack of sleep.
I was in a little bit of a daze the day after, but nothing significant.
Had a GREAT sleep the night following though, fucking dropped.

The days to follow had me feeling sharper...almost as though the brain went through a reboot.
Overall, it was a nice, relatively tame, unfrightening experience.
...Don't know if I'd ever want two at a time though.

All in all, I still prefer the "real" thing but these were not bad.

You lucky ass mother fucker... I'm having trouble finding any kind of psychedelics and I live in Las fucking Vegas...

I never really look for them, these ones just kind of came my way.

I'm getting the feeling that cheebacheeba would like me a whole lot more if I went and took acid too.

Dunno. Maybe. Though my perception of people that use drugs isn't really that they're cooler or "my crowd" or anything like that. Just a thing that some people do. Might change your own perceptions a bit, who knows.

[Morningriser]

I will wait out my post as well.

Cheeba...

LSD is nothing like it used to be here in the states. I first did it back in Spring of 2001 and it was in the area for a few months. it was pure liquid that the guy kept in Visine bottles. the first time I tripped I only meant to take 3 hits but the guy accidentally gave me 30 hits on my 3rd dose so I ended up with five hits in total And I can't even describe all the crazy stuff that I saw that day. I mean I tripped my fucking nuts off and my friends and I went down into this cave that had a waterfall and it was so beautiful down in it and the walls looked like melting ice cream that were flowing down into the cave and out of view. I have never had any kind of psychedelic experience remotely close to that one.

nowadays it just seems like acid doesn't have the same punch that used to and here in Vegas when you can find it it is usually $20 a hit which is fucking ridiculous. I have never tried mushrooms before but I have tried two kinds of mescaline, peyote and San Pedro and the Peyote mescaline was weak because I didn't have enough of it but the San Pedro was amazing. For me it was more of a visual trip than a spiritual trip It was still a great experience. my girlfriend at the time had this really wild pattern and it was moving like it would be during the onset of a strong acid trip. star asses off at Courage the Cowardly Dog and even colored in a coloring book. it was one of my more fun trips.

since I have been in Vegas, I have Smoked DMT one time and unfortunately I fucked it up. you have to be careful about the way you lied it or else it will burn up without producing any smoke. despite not making it into the lucid breakthrough, I did make it into what is referred to as the trip tunnel where it's more or less feels like you are stuck on a video game loading screen where you would either be waiting for the DMT to knock your ass out into the spirit world Or where you will spend the remainder of your trip. for me, I didn't know what to expect and I wanted to film myself with my Laptop. I was expecting to go unconscious so I was in a relaxed position when I hit my bong with the DMT Nestle's between some bud and Shake and when it took hold I found myself staring at my computer screen where are the virgin of me on the screen suddenly became a whole other 3D figure all together and there I was staring at myself and I couldn't move but I was able to look around in amazement and it actually did seem like a tunnel where my surroundings were blue But nothing existed other than me and my twin. The trip only lasted about five minutes. When you have the Lucid breakthrough, is believed you actually leave your body and enter the spirit world. If you have never heard of DMT or what it does or where it comes from, check it out on YouTube and you will be surprised actually.

[Bloof]

The first and only time i "dropped" acid was back in 1970. It scared me and i hated it. Went home, woke my parents up and asked them to take me to a hospital!

[Morningriser]

it's not for everyone. You have to be in a certain mindset or else it will mess you up.

[Sculpt]

The first and only time i "dropped" acid was back in 1970. It scared me and i hated it. Went home, woke my parents up and asked them to take me to a hospital!
I hear a bad trip is no fun. Was the hospital able to help you? What'd they do? Parents say, no more hanging out with that wild Betsy? ::wink::

[Morningriser]

Pussies... ::big grin::

[Morningriser]

Why the hell do I only attract emotional vampires? I mean the only women who will literally talk to me or the ones who go to such great lengths and take such timing to make me think they have genuine feelings for me only to pull the rug right out from under me. I get that I am apparently an easy target for that since it keeps happening but I'm just wondering why these are the only women who will even hold a conversation with me. I find it quite irritating and insulting, And not to mention a bit hurtful and humiliating.

[Bloof]

I hear a bad trip is no fun. Was the hospital able to help you? What'd they do? Parents say, no more hanging out with that wild Betsy? ::wink::

No, oddly enough my parents just stayed up with me til i came down. I think they were afraid of anyone finding out or the police being called. And then we didnt talk about it again

[Bloof]

Why the hell do I only attract emotional vampires? I mean the only women who will literally talk to me or the ones who go to such great lengths and take such timing to make me think they have genuine feelings for me only to pull the rug right out from under me. I get that I am apparently an easy target for that since it keeps happening but I'm just wondering why these are the only women who will even hold a conversation with me. I find it quite irritating and insulting, And not to mention a bit hurtful and humiliating.

Are you talking about the girl u just posted a pic of very recently?

[Morningriser]

yeah, she and I had known each other for a while and we really clicked and had so much to talk about and so much in common but she was being secretive and come to find out there was a guy who lives near her who apparently is her fuck-buddy or something that she wasn't telling me about and she didn't tell him about me and earlier it all came out but Apparently they are still cool with each other. What the hell makes people do shit like this? I mean I understand there are a lot of fucked up people in this world that purposely like fucking with people because they have nothing else better to do, but when it is so, that's the only kind of women Imeet online that act like they are interested in you.

a friend of mine told me earlier that I should look for the silver lining in this which is funny because that's something I often say And she is right. with this girl I did learn some patience and in hindsight I realize things started feeling out of the ordinary about a week or two I go when I came across this guy and she wouldn't tell me what was going on between the two of them even though on his profile there we're pictures of them that made them look pretty close. I am such a gullible ass clown and I need to just forget about women Even if they try to come on to me and act like they give a fuck.

now, with that said, next month I'm going to see if I can finally get my Nevada state ID and then in the spring once I have been here for a year I'm going to apply to the Community College. there are tons of bars in places around here to socialize but I am very awkward in that sense and despite there being some pretty cool themed bars here, they are all extremely dark and make me feel awkward So hopefully when I start to school I can start making some friends.

[Bloof]

Did you actually meet this girl in person or was it always online stuff?

[Sculpt]

yeah, she and I had known each other for a while and we really clicked and had so much to talk about and so much in common but she was being secretive and come to find out there was a guy who lives near her who apparently is her fuck-buddy or something that she wasn't telling me about and she didn't tell him about me and earlier it all came out but Apparently they are still cool with each other. What the hell makes people do shit like this? I mean I understand there are a lot of fucked up people in this world that purposely like fucking with people because they have nothing else better to do, but when it is so, that's the only kind of women Imeet online that act like they are interested in you.

a friend of mine told me earlier that I should look for the silver lining in this which is funny because that's something I often say And she is right. with this girl I did learn some patience and in hindsight I realize things started feeling out of the ordinary about a week or two I go when I came across this guy and she wouldn't tell me what was going on between the two of them even though on his profile there we're pictures of them that made them look pretty close. I am such a gullible ass clown and I need to just forget about women Even if they try to come on to me and act like they give a fuck.

now, with that said, next month I'm going to see if I can finally get my Nevada state ID and then in the spring once I have been here for a year I'm going to apply to the Community College. there are tons of bars in places around here to socialize but I am very awkward in that sense and despite there being some pretty cool themed bars here, they are all extremely dark and make me feel awkward So hopefully when I start to school I can start making some friends.
Sorry it didn't work out, Morn. I've had that situation many times. I get she may be seeing that dude in some capacity, but I didn't follow why you stopped seeing her. Did she breakup with you, coincidentally, when you found out he existed? Or did you breakup with her when you found out he existed?

You're OK with dating her even if she may be seeing other people, right?

I mean, people date multiple people at once. Unless you're married or engaged, nobody really knows if the person you're seeing is seeing other people, it's just all part of the process of getting to know someone, and then deciding if you're going to continue, or go another direction.

You know, if you see someone, get to know each other, if either you or her decide you're not a good match right now, it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with either one of you. It sucks for the person who might want to keep dating, but it might be for the best.

[DeadbeatAtDawn]

https://media.giphy.com/media/Tc5qihRF8U7Hq/giphy.gif

[cheebacheeba]

"Fuck that bitch".
...for whoever that might apply to...

[Morningriser]

we have never met in person and she wasn't my girlfriend so technically she can do whatever she wants with whoever she wants But that's not the point. this guy has all these pictures all over his profile of her and them together and I have seen in videos on her Channel they have known each other for at least a few years and when I asked her about him because originally I thought they were together and she told me she wasn't with anyone and then later on she kept getting pissed off that I would post things on her profile if they had anything to do with Endearment. I realize now I fell too hard for her too quick but I just can't understand why people will deliberately try to make people think they have feelings for them Just so they can build that emotion up to tear it down. sadistic people must have extremely bad lives if that's the Only thing they can do to get self-fulfillment is by bringing everyone else down to feel as miserable as they do.

I mean once I started finding out about this guy is when she started changing and going to all of these lengths to keep me from knowing about him or him knowing about me until today when the three of us were in a chat room together and he was talking to her like they are fuck buddies, which they probably are, And I got sick of it because if she's going to sit there and act like she has these feelings for me and wants to be with me she shouldn't be sitting there telling me that it's none of my business what's going on between the two of them. That's not fair to me and when I told her this I got blocked on Facebook so if that's how she's going to be then to hell with her.

[Bloof]

Well, you're a grown man and i know you can take care of yourself but in my opinion, don't look into the computer screen and start looking out the window. That's where the real world is.

[Morningriser]

It's funny you say that because every relationship I have been in has began online. In High School when all my friends and peers were out fucking around with each other, I was left out and thus was completely deprived of a social life and now I feel like LP. I mean I know it's all about confidence and you get Confidence from experience. I need to just worry about me for right now and try to find places I like to go where I feel comfortable And then go from there. and I know it's still a while yet until I can start school, but I think that would help me out a whole lot, probably more than anything right now as far as Putting myself in a social setting.

I need to teach myself how to not care as much although That has been hard for me to do. Considering everything I have been through in my life and I am still able to feel such passion for things so easily, I really don't understand that about myself and I don't like it because it makes me to gullible and naive and has me just asking for people to leech off of me And take whatever they want from me.

[Morningriser]

I suppose another silver lining in all of this is it has given me some insight on what I do wrong. I mean I'm sure I came off a little strong in the beginning because That's just how I am and I can't help it. I'm like a lost puppy dog and when someone comes to claim me I am all over them. I can accept responsibility for being a little do straightforward and probably even scaring some women in the past but that doesn't mean women can act like they are so genuinely interested in me but keeps secrets from me even when I am asking about them and clearly letting her know that it is concerning me and bothering me.

this woman is an emotional vampire who only seems to be interested in attention and sucking every little bit out of it they can before they are discovered and have to discard their victim or plaything and move on to someone else like a hungry spider just waiting to tangle their prey in their web so they can suck the life out of them. People like that have absolutely no remorse and no feelings for anyone other than themselves because they are too selfish to care about anyone else.

It is unfortunate that The only place I feel comfortable trying to meet people is on the internet but that has always been my downfall. I mean Las Vegas is the first place I have ever lived where I have an opportunity to get out and start trying to build a social life and honestly it scares me because I am so socially awkward and have very little Charisma but I know stuff like that comes with experience. These are things I should have learned years ago but I was never Exposed to such experiences.

so the silver lining in all of this is it has taught me that I need to stop listening to let women on the internet tell me who act like they are interested in me and take the advice I gave LP a while back and start getting out and going to the places where the kind of women hang out at that I would be interested in since the bar scene isn't really for me and I'm not a one-night-stand kind of guy. I should totally start Larkin the libraries and comic shop haha. in case you guys haven't noticed I like nerdy goth girls.

Somebody seriously should give me a swift kick in the face with a steel towed boot and tell me to stop procrastinating like a little bitch and get back to working on my novel. I don't know why I'm putting it off because I think it's a wonderful idea but Something is preventing me from starting it and I don't know what or why.

[Sculpt]

I suppose another silver lining in all of this is it has given me some insight on what I do wrong. I mean I'm sure I came off a little strong in the beginning because That's just how I am and I can't help it. I'm like a lost puppy dog and when someone comes to claim me I am all over them. I can accept responsibility for being a little do straightforward and probably even scaring some women in the past but that doesn't mean women can act like they are so genuinely interested in me but keeps secrets from me even when I am asking about them and clearly letting her know that it is concerning me and bothering me.

this woman is an emotional vampire who only seems to be interested in attention and sucking every little bit out of it they can before they are discovered and have to discard their victim or plaything and move on to someone else like a hungry spider just waiting to tangle their prey in their web so they can suck the life out of them. People like that have absolutely no remorse and no feelings for anyone other than themselves because they are too selfish to care about anyone else.

It is unfortunate that The only place I feel comfortable trying to meet people is on the internet but that has always been my downfall. I mean Las Vegas is the first place I have ever lived where I have an opportunity to get out and start trying to build a social life and honestly it scares me because I am so socially awkward and have very little Charisma but I know stuff like that comes with experience. These are things I should have learned years ago but I was never Exposed to such experiences.

so the silver lining in all of this is it has taught me that I need to stop listening to let women on the internet tell me who act like they are interested in me and take the advice I gave LP a while back and start getting out and going to the places where the kind of women hang out at that I would be interested in since the bar scene isn't really for me and I'm not a one-night-stand kind of guy. I should totally start Larkin the libraries and comic shop haha. in case you guys haven't noticed I like nerdy goth girls.

Somebody seriously should give me a swift kick in the face with a steel towed boot and tell me to stop procrastinating like a little bitch and get back to working on my novel. I don't know why I'm putting it off because I think it's a wonderful idea but Something is preventing me from starting it and I don't know what or why.
Good for you, Morn. Bloof is right, what matters is what's going on in-person, and not online.

Reading what you wrote here, I think you're feeling too much that relationships are all-on or all-off. That's not the way relationships work. Relationships take a long long time. See a lady one day, and if you still think it's beneficial, see her again. And see other ladies as well.

Don't look into, or pay attention to who she may or may not be seeing. If she's seeing someone, you can't really know what type of relationship they have. Maybe they're friends, maybe they're about to breakup, maybe about to get married... don't think you can know, or even should know... just worry about what you think of your relationship with her. It takes a long time to see if it's going to work out, you can't know in a matter of weeks, don't even try.

You can date a lady who's dating 3 other guys, some who've dated her for years, who want you to think they're an item, and in time, she may want to marry you. There shouldn't be anything surprising about that. That's just how relationships work. So don't be possessive. Don't assume you can know 'how much she's acting like she likes you'. Just find out who she is, and if you're a good match... anything else is emotional speculation, and not beneficial.

[Morningriser]

I guess it's unfair to slowly place the blame on her. I mean yeah I didn't know the whole story and I freaked out and probably scared her away. I do wish she would have told me what was going on although I do realize it wasn't her place to do that because technically it was none of my since she wasn't my girlfriend. I mean in all honesty who knows if she was being genuine or playing me all along. My gut instinct tells me she was playing me and rather than trusting my instincts I ignored them which often gets me in trouble. And yeah I am trying too hard, I know that. Going out places I'm not going to just suddenly get a girlfriend, I know Real Love Takes real time and as I also said before, women my age online usually have nothing better to do than fuck with people and when you are only messaging each other it's really hard to read into what the other person actually means since you have no way of physically communicating with them and that's what makes it emotionally dangerous. I set myself up for all of this. I mean my ex-girlfriend I was with for 11 years and I met online and a lot of you know how that ended. I think once I start back to school next year I will open myself up to so many new experiences and find that there is more to this place than I have discovered yet. To be fair though I have only been here 7 months so there is still so much in this city and outside of it that I have yet to explore.

[Morningriser]

If anyone would like to come watch A Clockwork Orange with me, I just started showing it on my Facebook page.

https://www.facebook.com/276209336413229/posts/276596306374532/

[Morningriser]

So I have been trying to self educate myself a little bit on some ways I can start working on improving my own self image and be able to put painful memories behind me.

The last couple months I started getting lazy. I was working out everyday but since the laundry room is being renovated here and the Jim are in the same building it has been shut down. I know me just sitting around doing hardly anything has taken a toll on my mood as of late so I have started trying to find things to do to ground me and help me understand how I can go about improving my ego. I'm trying to teach myself to stop thinking so negatively about myself and realize my worth. I have started trying to work out the best I can to get active again and I have even started meditating. I am of course in the very beginning stages and it will take time to get better at it and for it to start benefiting me but I would like to think I am on the right track. I mean I have decided to say fuck it with the whole online thing trying to meet women because all it does is stress me out and Trigger my anxiety. Besides, this needs to be my time for me that way one day I properly can pursue someone and hopefully make a much better impression than I currently do. I am learning I need to cut all of my triggers and stressors out of my life so I have nothing bad to constantly be picking at me. The sound so weird to say considering I am 37 years old but in some ways I feel like I have grown up more in these last seven months than I probably have in the last 7 years. Sink or swim situations really do seem to bring out the Best in Me.

[Sculpt]

So I have been trying to self educate myself a little bit on some ways I can start working on improving my own self image and be able to put painful memories behind me.

The last couple months I started getting lazy. I was working out everyday but since the laundry room is being renovated here and the Jim are in the same building it has been shut down. I know me just sitting around doing hardly anything has taken a toll on my mood as of late so I have started trying to find things to do to ground me and help me understand how I can go about improving my ego. I'm trying to teach myself to stop thinking so negatively about myself and realize my worth. I have started trying to work out the best I can to get active again and I have even started meditating. I am of course in the very beginning stages and it will take time to get better at it and for it to start benefiting me but I would like to think I am on the right track. I mean I have decided to say fuck it with the whole online thing trying to meet women because all it does is stress me out and Trigger my anxiety. Besides, this needs to be my time for me that way one day I properly can pursue someone and hopefully make a much better impression than I currently do. I am learning I need to cut all of my triggers and stressors out of my life so I have nothing bad to constantly be picking at me. The sound so weird to say considering I am 37 years old but in some ways I feel like I have grown up more in these last seven months than I probably have in the last 7 years. Sink or swim situations really do seem to bring out the Best in Me.
Right on, Brother! Just a suggestion, lots of people wake up at a specific time and go out for a long walk in the morning, at least 20 mins. Can you do that?
Of course some people jog, which if you can do that, it's even better, you will really feel the effects of pumped up system if you can jog. From what I heard, meditation is one of those things you have to do everyday at aprx the same time, and its effects are measured over years, we can't expect to see amazing results in a few days or weeks. You do a TM or what?

[Morningriser]

I get out and walk every day. I love getting out and walking around here. I just haven't been able to lift weights in a few months. I have actually lost a lot of weight since I have been here and physically I feel great! I just want to also add the meditation because not only is a good for your body physically, it's good mentally as well and it helps release negative energy and thoughts and feelings. I am trying to make a legitimate effort to turn my life around because I know if I keep on going the way I am I'm just going to end up so miserable eventually one day I'm going to say fuck it and try something stupid again. The last time I think I survived for a reason but if I continue down this path of self-loathing to the point where it pushes anyone that comes into my life away, I will eventually try again. I really don't want that but that thought crosses my mind almost every day. I mean my grandfather has been a father to me and is still the only family I have left who will have anything to do with me so when something happens to him I know it's going to hit me hard so I have to prepare myself now so that way when something does happen it won't finish me off. I think I'm doing really well for myself and I feel like this move alone has saved my life. When I was in Virginia I lived in my mother's old house, the house she died in and while I am an atheist and don't believe in ghosts and such, I do believe in negative energy and I feel like that house was full of it and it scared me. I am in a much better place now both physically and mentally and emotionally as well. It's going to take time to really straighten myself out but time is really all I have.

[cheebacheeba]

Still drinking soda?
That's honestly a big one.
Fucks with your system, your blood pressure, keeps you from losing weight by flooding your system with sugar, your skin even suffers.

Try doing two weeks with no fast food or added sugar. If you drink coffee or tea lower it to one sugar in each. The MOMENT you get a soda or even juice craving fucking FLOOD yourself with water, so that you think you're going to vomit if you even think about drinking more.

Takes a few weeks of being a nazi, man.

Push ups at home are a bit of an easy way to take steps - just do like 3-4 at first. Build up to 10. If you can eventually get to 20 just leave it there until such a time as you want to do more.
Or get some little tiny bitch weights. Like...those ones with the colourful covering. Start doing a few curls here and there on those when you're watching a TV show.

Shave your head fucking bald and promise yourself that you're doing it as a fresh start, and that by the time it grows back you'll be in a better place.

When you feel hungry...if you know you've already eaten enough, or that it's just a craving...if you're gonna eat, make it after you walk six blocks...it'll encourage you doing this as a regular thing, and chances are it'll be a momentary or boredom based craving that'll fuck off after a walk anyway. Take the occasional joint with you. Just go somewhere and look up at the stars.

Exercise can combat emotional/mental shit too...not completely...but medication isn't the only way. It's amazing how moving about and not feeling exhausted can do for your confidence and how you feel about yourself, I mean don't get me wrong. I never feel "happy" when I'm doing it, or even after...but the change with how you feel about yourself and how others respond to that, is real...and you get lots of good flow on effects.

Stay cool, man.

[Morningriser]

Ha! I so called this...

[Morningriser]

Hey man there's a whole thread dedicated to that.

But yeah I haven't watched it and I'm not sure if I am going to. The idea was awesome at first but then for some reason once they started using that stupid Eminem song and having him repeatedly make stupid noises, for what reason I have no idea since they were deliberately doing it for the trailer, it completely turn me off. Yes I know my hatred for M&M has nothing to do with Venom, but it just totally turn me away when I heard his stupid ass obnoxious voice. Comic book movies have really lost their luster for me anyway unless it's something cool like Deadpool or something that isn't considered Your Average superhero movie. I mean I grew up idolizing Superman and Batman and even I am sick of the DC movies after holding such high hopes for Justice League for so many years only for it to be the biggest joke of what could have been a great movie. The truth is Hollywood is getting lazy about everything. I mean when they are making stupid movies like Mortal engines because it was written by Peter Jackson, that should tell you they don't give a flying fuck.

[anglewitch]

*Jumps on top of a table*




, the year was 1778, HOW I WISH I WAS IN SHERBROOKE NOW!
A letter of marque come from the king,
To the scummiest vessel I'd ever seen,

CHORUS:
God damn them all!
I was told we'd cruise the seas for American gold
We'd fire no guns-shed no tears
Now I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier
The last of Barrett's Privateers.

Oh, Elcid Barrett cried the town, HOW I WISH I WAS . . .
For twenty brave men all fishermen who
would make for him the Antelope's crew
(chorus)

The Antelope sloop was a sickening sight,
She'd a list to the port and and her sails in rags
And the cook in scuppers with the staggers and the jags
(chorus)

On the King's birthday we put to sea,
We were 91 days to Montego Bay
Pumping like madmen all the way
(chorus)

On the 96th day we sailed again,
When a bloody great Yankee hove in sight
With our cracked four pounders we made to fight
(chorus)

The Yankee lay low down with gold,
She was broad and fat and loose in the stays
But to catch her took the Antelope two whole days
(chorus)

Then at length we stood two cables away,
Our cracked four pounders made an awful din
But with one fat ball the Yank stove us in
(chorus)

The Antelope shook and pitched on her side,
Barrett was smashed like a bowl of eggs
And the Maintruck carried off both me legs
(chorus)

So here I lay in my 23rd year,
It's been 6 years since we sailed away
And I just made Halifax yesterday
(chorus)

[Morningriser]

Still drinking soda?
That's honestly a big one.
Fucks with your system, your blood pressure, keeps you from losing weight by flooding your system with sugar, your skin even suffers.

Try doing two weeks with no fast food or added sugar. If you drink coffee or tea lower it to one sugar in each. The MOMENT you get a soda or even juice craving fucking FLOOD yourself with water, so that you think you're going to vomit if you even think about drinking more.

Takes a few weeks of being a nazi, man.

Push ups at home are a bit of an easy way to take steps - just do like 3-4 at first. Build up to 10. If you can eventually get to 20 just leave it there until such a time as you want to do more.
Or get some little tiny bitch weights. Like...those ones with the colourful covering. Start doing a few curls here and there on those when you're watching a TV show.

Shave your head fucking bald and promise yourself that you're doing it as a fresh start, and that by the time it grows back you'll be in a better place.

When you feel hungry...if you know you've already eaten enough, or that it's just a craving...if you're gonna eat, make it after you walk six blocks...it'll encourage you doing this as a regular thing, and chances are it'll be a momentary or boredom based craving that'll fuck off after a walk anyway. Take the occasional joint with you. Just go somewhere and look up at the stars.

Exercise can combat emotional/mental shit too...not completely...but medication isn't the only way. It's amazing how moving about and not feeling exhausted can do for your confidence and how you feel about yourself, I mean don't get me wrong. I never feel "happy" when I'm doing it, or even after...but the change with how you feel about yourself and how others respond to that, is real...and you get lots of good flow on effects.

Stay cool, man.

Hey man I feel so stupid because I just now saw this. I hope you didn't think I was ignoring you because I didn't even know it existed until just now. I am losing weight pretty well and maintaining a good exercise habit and I have also recently started meditating which I haven't noticed any changes yet but I know it takes a long time of doing it before you actually start feeling the benefits from it. I will just Keep On Keepin On but despite everything I always get a little emotional this time of the year considering my mother died on the 20th and then her birthday was on the 22nd and I just get a little lonely. I am doing a lot better though since I moved out here

[Bloof]

To all my brothers and sisters in horror and to Cheeb's little River.. may you all have a blessed Christmas ❤

[DeadbeatAtDawn]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/3387b454ccef36036b93a3b08da917f7/tumblr_pk81p2djW51xo6426o1_400.jpg

[Bloof]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/3387b454ccef36036b93a3b08da917f7/tumblr_pk81p2djW51xo6426o1_400.jpg

::love:: you gurrrl! You slay me!

[Morningriser]

Happy human holidays everyone!

[Bloof]

Happy human holidays everyone!

Right back atcha, Morning!

[Sculpt]

Thanks, Bloof, DeadBeat and Morn!

Have a blessed Christmas and New Years, everyone!

[Morningriser]

Ah..
New Year's Eve is going to be so much fun for me! Las Vegas turns into Times Square basically. They even drop the ball down on the Strip but I am probably just going to go to Fremont Street. All I know is there's going to be alcohol involved and if there's music probably dancing. Yes, I actually love to dance if it's the right music.

[Morningriser]

So I about laid my own ass out last night! I was lying in bed, which is literally right up against the side of my couch, and I went to reach for my phone and when I turned to lay back down in my bed I pretty violently smashed the side of my nose against the side of the couch. It bled but now I'm laughing about it!

[Morningriser]

Did I miss something? This place has been dead as fuck the last few days and I mean even more dead than normal. I think there was two posts yesterday and the only other person I saw online all day was Tommy Jarvis. No one died did they?::big grin::

[MovieLover12]

I made a movie-related post and asked another question that I know nobody on here is clever enough to answer.

[Morningriser]

That's a bit presumptuous of you isn't it? So what's the question? I don't see it anywhere.

[Bloof]

I made a movie-related post and asked another question that I know nobody on here is clever enough to answer.

Im going to have to watch the movie.

[Morningriser]

My apologies ml, now I feel like a smartass. I didn't even see the post and now I see what you mean about the question. ::big grin::

[Morningriser]

There is absolutely no reason at all why this movie should not get at the very least an Oscar nomination. I am still Spellbound at how amazingly good this movie is.

SQmOaJciI7Q

[Morningriser]

I don't give a fuck if I'm the only one that posts in here anymore not. I love you all. Have a Happy New Year and whatever you do tonight, do it responsibly.

[DeadbeatAtDawn]

https://66.media.tumblr.com/42aa81a122aba158ed5790993859e816/tumblr_pklvgfMeeo1u6p9qxo2_r1_540.gif

[Morningriser]

I was reminded when I woke up this morning why it's a good idea that I don't drink very often anymore. I drank 4 fruit flavored Steel Reserve tall boys and they knocked my ass out long before midnight. I was going to walk down the street to Lowe's to watch the fireworks from the parking lot but I totally missed it. I woke up this morning feeling like I just had minor surgery. I hate to admit it but I'm getting too old for this shit ::big grin::

[cheebacheeba]

Well...did our January 1st doing pretty much nothing.
Acid on NYE. Boom and now here I am.

[Morningriser]

Lucky fucker! ::big grin::

Assuming all goes well though I'm getting a quarter of mushrooms Thursday so I am excited as this will be my first mushroom trip. It's the only drug I think I have never done that I wanted to do. See you on the other side!

[hammerfan]

Happy New Year, HDC!

[Morningriser]

When crazy ass internet bitches with kids will tell you whatever the fuck it is I think you want to hear and even say sexual stuff but then completely block every trace of you when you say something sexual back... 2019 logic in a nutshell. I Now understand why these chicks are single mothers.

I used to get angry and blame myself and think it was my fault and all that other stupid shit that made me feel sorry for myself but now I just realize it's not me, it's that stupid fucking creatures exist in this world and some people should seriously have their genitals removed so they cannot reproduce.

[Morningriser]

Something is Awakening in me, something beautiful, something sacred. And yes, I will admit, I am under the influence currently of two hits of ecstasy and one hit of Molly. That's beside the point because despite my physical trip, my internal trip is suddenly repairing everything in my brain that I have been missing for the last several years of my life that reciprocates and understands emotions and how to love and see things for the beauty in them and be able to let go. Life is Beautiful again.

[Morningriser]

Tonight I have discovered that I and in some ways more than others, a narcissist. I don't feel like that has to be a bad thing though if it is used in the correct ways. I know I come off as pretentious, a know-it-all, arrogant, selfish, insecure, jealous, vengeful, prideful, and whatever other cliche you can think of to throw at me that you have observed in my behavior, I respect it. But what if I could take all of that to create something positive for the world and actually try to make this world livable for the Human Race 2 survive for thousands of more years. I know that is very grandiose but can't never could do anything, could he?

[cheebacheeba]

It's cool, man...everyone's narcissistic to some degree. It's a human flaw.

[ShankS]

Happy belated new Year ::smile::

[hammerfan]

Happy belated new Year ::smile::

::shocked::


Holy hell, dude! How are you?! What's been going on? I have a million questions, and can't think of one! ::big grin::

[Morningriser]

Oh man... I can't even begin to describe the last 36 hours that have done everything from completely stripping my ego and showing me exactly who I am, what I want, and the way I have been talking to people. I use such aggressive words because I don't take the time to think and when I get angry I want to explode with the most hurtful things I can and I know that's what drives people away because I never learned how to slow down and stop nuclear bombing everyone with all of my emotions all at once when most of the time I don't even know what I'm feeling because I immediately feel regret afterwards.

What I can tell you guys from memory is this. After I Disappeared last night, I ate more shrooms because I did not get the experience I wanted the first time. I was lying on my couch and I had 10000 Days by Tool playing on my stereo and I had on my TV a psychedelic trance video that I was watching as I was listening to the music. If you are familiar with the album, the song Jambi what's playing and it's very upbeat and in the video it was very colorful and the color started coming for me like it was trying to pull me in. It's slowly got closer and closer until the song stopped and the colors and imagery that was coming at me came back into the TV I guess because somehow I was picturing it with the music.

And now comes the interesting part. Wings for Marie started playing which is a very low and very dark song with thunder even so naturally different colored dragons start coming at me slowly and creeping up on me and it's like I could see them blowing fire out their nostrils. They were small but there were many of them from green to Yellow to red and the fire was translucent Orange. At one point a golden dragon started flapping its wings toward me and I got the feeling it was friendly. It passed me and disappeared. As the music continue playing I kind of noticed in my head that it seemed stuck like it was just the exact same two or three seconds repeating itself and then as the dragon started getting closer they just pulled back and everything around me started fading to Black. It was almost as if I was dying, which in a sense I was. However, I knew what to expect. I suppose I was able to burn it into my subconscious which is a good thing because it kept me calm. In fact I even remember verbally kind of laughing and being sarcastic and saying something like oh no here it comes.

The rest is mostly a blur for right now but I am piecing it together and I will get back to you guys with the rest.

[cheebacheeba]

I wrote myself a very frank email...well, that's what I ended up doing anyway...

My intention was to simply lay out my plan for getting fit, losing weight, and document the process along the way so I might be able to hand on advice, recognise what works, what doesn't, and list my challenges along the way.

It's funny when you start to follow certain trains of thought, when you're truly introspective. Some of it was actually a bit upsetting to acknowledge, in terms of basically how I feel about myself.
Trying, isn't the same as wanting to try, or trying to try, which is basically what I've been doing for the last few years.
I think it's important that people learn to draw a distinction between the two.
Too much procrastination. Too many excuses and lazy logic. Too many "You're doing well so this allows for that" occasions.
The shit is hard, but mainly in my mind...which is way harder to change than your body.

So yeah nothing really more to report, I just thought it was interesting that I set out to do one thing and ended up ripping everything out of myself that I could, to lay it all out and be honest with myself...it's not as though I couldn't do it in my mind, but there's something about writing it out.

Don't know if this "diary" type thing will ever be seen by anyone else...I'm not the kind to really go that public with things. But it's there, it exists at least for me.

So in short, diet changes, more actively taking my dog on longer walks, and actual SOLID, ongoing gym attendance.
My first step is that I've paid for an actual session with a personal trainer to write me a program. I'll be attending no less than four times a week for around an hour and a half every time.

...of course, what happened at the beginning of the year?
Me and the family got sick with some kinda flu crap.
So yeah my PT session is on Monday - and all going well that will be my "real" start point. The dietary changes are already underway. The dog walks are already underway. I just need to stop hacking horrible shit outta my lungs now.

Blahblahblah that's me done.

[cheebacheeba]

Youtube - Sign in to confirm your age.
Gmail - Never asked for age.
Logic?

[Morningriser]

We have to do that in the states here if it's a video that is considered make sure.

Coincidentally, I went live on Facebook yesterday morning around 5:30 a.m. because I for some reason felt compelled to document my trip, or at least my first one. Around 6 a.m. or so is when they started to affect me, depending on how full your stomach is, it can take anywhere from 15 to 30 minutes to take effect.

The reason psychedelics make you feel bad about yourself in certain aspects is because they completely strip away your ego and your subconscious completely takes over and shows you who you truly are. For example, have you ever came out of a trip and then suddenly said to yourself, oh my God I can't believe I've not known this all along about myself? That is because as your ego is stripped and you are exposed just psychedelics heal you and they strengthen you and make you see. I am not sure what all you have taken or experienced but different medicines have different effects. I do like acid but I much prefer natural medicines like mushrooms, DMT and mescaline. The more stronger, the mushrooms and DMT, will render you unconscious if you have a strong enough dose and pull you into a world that that you can clearly understand is not this dimension. Everything moves in spirals, including yourself and as you practically melting away, for me anyway, when the colors from the TV start approaching me and then turn into dragons is when it just felt like everything was becoming a liquid. I don't even remember passing out but I did.

Right now all I can remember is some sort of chant that kept repeating itself and eventually it started feeling like I was spiralling upwards, keep in mind at this point my body no longer existed, all I can remember is it was leading up to something that was going to reveal the meaning of life because as the chanting continued it was getting louder and louder like more people were doing it and quicker and more intense. Then all of a sudden I saw all these events Flash before me that I couldn't physically see but I knew what they were and remembered them. Like it was my life flashing before my eyes and it moved so quickly but I comprehended everything and then as all the darkness that was surrounding the rest of me started fading away and giving shape to some sort of open room that I was lying in. I was still not in my physical form but yet it was as if I was. Finally this chant finished and somehow it was in reference to the meaning of life All Along being a joke and the way I perceived it was it's just a cycle as in we die and then are just reborn but not as another human, but into a whole other concept all together. As the room around me was lighting up, I started hearing this voice in my head as if I was speaking for my life. It's like as if I was trying to say everything I could to remain in denial that I was in heaven but finally, inevitably I realized in my mind I was in heaven, I guess maybe because that's the word I have for whatever is beyond considering we don't know yet.

Unless something else happened that I can't remember yet, that is when I came out of it but when I did I was extremely disoriented and still tripping my ass off. At this point I was exhausted because I had been up for a long time so I just laid here enjoying the visuals until I finally fell asleep.

[Dead Bad Things]

Sounds like you got your face stolen.
Next time I get my hands on some a those things I'm gonna sink 'em in some honey for awhile.

[Morningriser]

This is similar to what the friendly go dragon look like. I'm not necessarily sure the colored Dragons Were evil, they were kind of dancing around me and whenever I breathe out my nose they kind of backed off just a little bit but they were breathing translucent fire that obviously wasn't real but it was just so astonishing. I think they might have been there to guide me.

[newb]

Happy Belated....been a bit

[Sculpt]

Happy Belated....been a bit
Happy Christmas and Merry New Years to ya, Newb!

[cheebacheeba]

ShankS Man, you're here. Hey.

[Morningriser]

I would love to be able to find someone who could help me see about arranging to sit in on a Native American ayahuasca ceremony. I am not exactly sure where, but I know there are plenty of places outside of Las Vegas in the desert where Native Americans still live and perform these rituals.

If I am unable to find a way to do this all is not lost, I can actually purchase the ingredients online and then make the tea here. A DMT Transcendence his much more peaceful and controllable then a mushroom Transcendence. I have not made it to that level with DMT yet but just considering how the trip was going to pull me in, it was so much more peaceful and calm. The mushroom trip pulling me in was beautiful but intense and then when The Tool song Jambi stop playing everything started getting darker and then wings for Marie made the dragons come. I could feel reality closing in on me as if I were in a casket being lowered down and I could even Envision skulls around me. I still have the ability to think at this point, knowing I actually wasn't dying, I knew I was going to be shown something that was going to scare something out of me as I knew I was subconsciously going to hell.

I do want to go ahead and warn Anyone who reads this who has never tried psychedelics before but are considering it, you need to study on what they do to you and how they make you feel and realize they can make you feel bad about yourself if there is something negative going on in your life because it takes away your ego which basically takes away any denial you have and it shows you the guilt and makes you feel the shame. Some people cannot handle that While others can and it actually helps you improve that automatically because your subconscious now has new abilities so to speak that it never had before. Did you know that your subconscious cannot tell the difference between you dreaming or being awake? When you repeatedly tell yourself something and went to convince yourself, for example, you tell yourself you are an amazing artist or speaker, Etc. You start feeling more energetic and more enthusiastic towards your work and you feel in your head that you are amazing and it gives you a boost of confidence, does it not? That's because these thoughts are breaking through your filter which separates the conscious from the subconscious. Your conscious memories aren't really the memories that you need to store away in a permanent archive if you will. You remember something you need to buy at the grocery store, that's in your conscious memory because once you buy it it will most likely be forgotten. This energy and drive and confidence you give yourself just continues to radiate in a spiral that drives your ego because you're self-conscious sees what an improvement is happening to your body and mind but also your confidence, which inflates the ego.

When you take psychedelics, whether if you go unconscious or not, your ego will be stripped down and anything underneath that you are not dealing with or that is holding you back will Force itself out of you. That's why it is very difficult for some people, especially people going into it thinking it's some kind of party drug when it really isn't.

[Morningriser]

As odd as this sounds, not long after making that previous post, I came into contact with someone who can get me some ayahuasca, which is what the natives drink for their DMT trips. It'll be next week sometime when I get it but I have to say, I am feeling so overjoyed. Don't worry though guys, I'm not going to make a habit out of this, I'm just using this opportunity where I would otherwise be depressed during the winter solstice, to enrich my mind.

Oh fortune!

[Morningriser]

I have set a goal and challenge for myself. At the end of May I am going to go camp for a week in the Redwood forest in Northern California. This is a place I have always wanted to visit and even had reoccurring dreams about as a child before I even knew what the Redwoods were, where they were or really anything else for that matter other than I was in the woods with the tallest trees I had ever seen, which later turned out to be redwoods, and the lighting all around was orange. I dreamed I had a tomb of sorts that was way out in the wilderness away from everyone and everything and that's where I was buried. Perhaps I am meant to die there oh, I don't know. I do know I have always wanted to take a trip there but I have never really had the means or the way to get there and even once I did get there, the knowledge of how to get to and from the campsite but I have been taking my time to figure all of this out and save the necessary amount of money needed and needless to say, if all goes the way I would like it to, I am going to get to camp in a huge Golden Meadow on the beach with the Pacific Ocean and beautiful Cliffs on one side and the Redwood Forest on the other. I want to have some time alone in nature and most likely will be taking some mushrooms and or Ayahuasca with me to have this experience I feel like I need.

[Dead Bad Things]

I saw something' about a 2019 psychedelics conference goin' on in AZ...
Myself I just made up my mind today, I'm goin' to the National Rainbow Gathering in MN. this summer. ::smile::

[Morningriser]

I saw something' about a 2019 psychedelics conference goin' on in AZ...
Myself I just made up my mind today, I'm goin' to the National Rainbow Gathering in MN. this summer. ::smile::

I don't suppose you would be willing to let me go with you would you?

[newb]

WOW...WTF happened to this forum. It's pretty much one or two posters totally dominating every thread. I pop in every once in awhile hoping to maybe converse a bit but it's always the same boring stuff. zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.

[Dead Bad Things]

Caravan? Hell yeah!
I gotta feelin' tho that the 2020 National may make a westward swing...maybe even south-westward.

[Morningriser]

I'm sure there's all kinds of cool shit out here. I have always wanted to go to burning man but I'm not going to pay $700 plus 200 more dollars to camp out for a week for that shit. I don't know if it's true or not but supposedly they are going to have a Woodstock this summer to celebrate the 50th Anniversary but again, I don't know if that's true or not. But if you ever get the notion to want to go to something like that and would like someone to go with you let me know, I could take a bus up to Montana to meet you.

[Dead Bad Things]

Yeah I caught word of that 50th Woodstock aniversary that'd be hit! Too far outta my range tho..

[Morningriser]

I imagine it would be a bunch of garbage anyway. Probably some stupid shit they would have Beyonce at or something and try to pass it off as rock and roll. I think it would be safe to say that Willie Nelson will be there though considering he has performed at the other three.

[cheebacheeba]

WOW...WTF happened to this forum. It's pretty much one or two posters totally dominating every thread. I pop in every once in awhile hoping to maybe converse a bit but it's always the same boring stuff. zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.

Everyone left.

[Bloof]

WOW...WTF happened to this forum. It's pretty much one or two posters totally dominating every thread. I pop in every once in awhile hoping to maybe converse a bit but it's always the same boring stuff. zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.

Hey! I think the 2 times the site went offline really killed things. And now apparently there"s no way for new members to sign up.

[Morningriser]

I'm not sure how I should feel about a guy who is immediately giving permission to be banned.

[cheebacheeba]

WOW...WTF happened to this forum. It's pretty much one or two posters totally dominating every thread. I pop in every once in awhile hoping to maybe converse a bit but it's always the same boring stuff. zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.

Like I said under "reason", it's not something I wanted to do...but if it's a request I'll honour it.
Zwoti has been gone like, almost longer than any of the original (or near original) crew here, and this is something of a loss...but it's on me.

Personally I'd rather someone came back and like tried to throw in to the place and see if we can help it out, get closer to what it used to be etc.
He's right though.
Anyone that's been here for a while knows this.
The place has died.
Each time it went off, more long term members lost interest. Less new members came in because it looked dead. Facebook. All of that and we have this forum that's just like a dead body getting rolled around in the waves...it's like a dead city.

It is what it is though.
It is, what it is.

Sorry you had to go, newb.
Was good seeing you for a second.

[Sculpt]

Like I said under "reason", it's not something I wanted to do...but if it's a request I'll honour it.
Zwoti has been gone like, almost longer than any of the original (or near original) crew here, and this is something of a loss...but it's on me.

Personally I'd rather someone came back and like tried to throw in to the place and see if we can help it out, get closer to what it used to be etc.
He's right though.
Anyone that's been here for a while knows this.
The place has died.
Each time it went off, more long term members lost interest. Less new members came in because it looked dead. Facebook. All of that and we have this forum that's just like a dead body getting rolled around in the waves...it's like a dead city.

It is what it is though.
It is, what it is.

Sorry you had to go, newb.
Was good seeing you for a second.
Well, he said, "zwoti....feel free to ban my ass." I think it was just an expression, not an actual request, I don't think. If you ban him, would be hard for him to correct a misconception. ::big grin::

[cheebacheeba]

Done and done I'm afraid.
It's cool. He has multiple accounts if he wants to come back in, I'd welcome it.
Though it seems like nobody that comes back in is happy with the place, so it is what it is...we keep the shit-show happening one way or another.

[Morningriser]

I think I could be a shaman. When I posted this morning in the other thread was honestly something I copied from Facebook I posted. I said all of the characteristics except one of them, which I actually think sounds quite far-fetched is telepathy, which I do not have but I am quite empathic. I think the next time I move somewhere I'm going to try to find somewhere with a private area I can start trying to grow certain plants and herbs. I know not all shamans specifically deal in the growing of herbs, but I would still like to start learning how to do my own thing. I just honestly don't know where to begin.

[cheebacheeba]

Begin with Salvia

[Morningriser]

I've never tried Salvia and judging by the way it makes people react, I really don't want to.

[Sculpt]

Have you trance journeyed like a shaman? Carl Jung had a shaman trance journey from one room into the next room and describe what was on the table. You should try that. Of course you need someone to setup something for you to see in the room (that you wouldn't know was there).

[Morningriser]

I have not yet reached that level. I am currently in talks with someone in an attempt to obtain some DMT and see where it takes me. I actually don't think I really meant to be a Healer. I think I'm just meant to share the wisdom I obtain.

[cheebacheeba]

LOL dmt, that's like from our trees here right?
Thought about getting some.

I should let you know though, apparently it's similar to, but more intense than salvia.

I suggested salvia because...it puts you in a state of pure joy and introspection...ego nigh-death occurs. You lose all associations with language, and the state of your being just dissipates, then reassembles refreshed and renewed almost immediately, it's just like you wake up and feel like you've had a mental defrag.

Seems to me like you could go with a low level extract (I had 20x at first) to get where you're trying to go.

The people you've seen online are often on 80x extracts etc, some even 100x extracts and more...I don't even know why you'd ever want one that strong at all...and I would imagine for anything other than serious, experienced users doing this, would be pretty knocked around.
What you're seeing (and I've seen it too...it's occasionally funny but to be honest it's a step backwards in perception of salvia) is irresponsible use.
I wouldn't be too worried.
Each to their own though, eh?

Good luck with it. I'm largely past all this stuff but will throw into the convo when there's something of use to say.

[Morningriser]

DMT is in every living thing, even us. It is believed to be located in the area where the third eye is metaphorically placed. Some say the bright light people claim to see before they die is the DMT becoming active which is meant to remove your soul from your body. I have smoke DMT before but I didn't do it correctly and I only got the conscious trip. I imagined Salvia put you out kind of like mushrooms. The videos I have seen of people on salvia though go into some kind of seizure or start doing something which usually prompts them to need a sitter with them in case they try to do something crazy like jump out a window, which apparently has happened on salvia to someone. The mushrooms made me do a Linda Blair mini freak out of sorts apparently because I broke my coffee table and had a bunch of scratches and bumps all over me. That was mostly my fault though for being the dumbass that did it on the couch instead of on my bed.

I seem to have a very high tolerance when it comes to psychedelic drugs. I've done a lot in my life so that's probably why. I'm not going to discount the possibility of trying Salvia if I ever get the opportunity, but it's not something I'm just out looking for.


Cheebs, if you or anyone else in here for that matter ever try something like DMT, Ayahuasca or mushrooms or really any kind of psychedelic that puts you in an unconscious State, be sure to do all of your research and be in a very comfortable mindset because the first time you do it, you are going to think you are dying unless you know for a fact in your mind that you aren't in the only way you can do that is by research and giving yourself the assurance that you are okay and that you need to just submit to the drug and let it do what it wants to do.

[Sculpt]

https://i.redd.it/3vg599r0c2621.gif

[Marley's Ghost]

So newb was banned
Thank god for that
Was a dinosaur
An somewhat of a brat

He tried to recapture
A time long gone
He didn’t realize
The Forum was a yawn

Not to disparage
The current members present
You all seem like cool peeps
He just needed to vent

We can’t go back
And he holds no grudge
He was very accepting
Of his Aussie Judge

There’s always facebook
Where he pops in now and then
Says hello to past members
Margie, Rodd and Bren

Newb was a time long ago
A time that has come to pass
So I’ll also join him and say
“zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.”

[Morningriser]

I am so lost and confused. Who is this newb guy and what did he do? I mean I know he was here long before I was obviously but I am still totally lost and oblivious.

[Bloof]

I am so lost and confused. Who is this newb guy and what did he do? I mean I know he was here long before I was obviously but I am still totally lost and oblivious.

This place totally used to be jumpin' back in the day. Probably one of the first ones too. A lot of original posters have a hard time seeing it like this. Newb didnt do anything, lol. Great guy by all accounts.

[hammerfan]

newb's hardly on Facebook anymore, either. Really miss that guy.

[Morningriser]

I wish I knew about this place back then. Everywhere else I go has their own clicks and will be so quick to turn against you if they don't like you. This has been about the only place I haven't been judged by others for not going along with everyone and developing my own opinions. Despite what some people might think, I never really was a bad guy, just misunderstood.

[cheebacheeba]

I wish I knew about this place back then. Everywhere else I go has their own clicks and will be so quick to turn against you if they don't like you.
We had that going on too...but it was more like the majority of that crowd was kind've more mature, and really an amazing bunch of people that were just here to shoot the shit about anything and everything horror related or otherwise - Like a big family...but yes, there were quite a few pop up cases of people that stirred shit...and there was always more than enough people to slap them down for it.
I don't believe anyone got ganged up on or bullied or anything like that though, it was more just a chorus of "cut the shit".
Most settled of course, some didn't.

But yeah, it was vibrant...it was literally buzzing nearly at all times...you'd come in and see 10-15 new topics every other day, and like 20+ new posts in most ongoing threads. I don't know what the difference was...people moved on I guess...and lost interest when things kept fucking up here.
You "regular" posters in here now would have fit in really well back then.

I don't know if newb actually wanted to be legitimately banned or not.
In hindsight it's a decision I should have spent some more time to ponder... Though, I'd assumed the request legit and not too problematic for him to "come back" anyways.
I guess, I was disappointed because when I see someone, or a few people return for an appearance here and there, every time, every single time I hope it's to stay and maybe bring back a bit of what kept us all here in the first place.

So maybe I just went on "fuck it" mode, took the request with something of a heavy heart, because I don't know...I see no way of fixing this forum at all, and now we have no way of new members signing up at all...and now, it's just another step further away from where it was.


Back to random shit I guess

Went into the gym today and saw my PT.
He actually wants me to aim to train less than I'd intended to, to kind of work up my attendance. I get that, to a point.
He's writing my up a new programme to follow as well, and we're going to go every 2 months to get a check up and adjust programme.

[Sculpt]

We had that going on too...but it was more like the majority of that crowd was kind've more mature, and really an amazing bunch of people that were just here to shoot the shit about anything and everything horror related or otherwise - Like a big family...but yes, there were quite a few pop up cases of people that stirred shit...and there was always more than enough people to slap them down for it.
I don't believe anyone got ganged up on or bullied or anything like that though, it was more just a chorus of "cut the shit".
Most settled of course, some didn't.

But yeah, it was vibrant...it was literally buzzing nearly at all times...you'd come in and see 10-15 new topics every other day, and like 20+ new posts in most ongoing threads. I don't know what the difference was...people moved on I guess...and lost interest when things kept fucking up here.
You "regular" posters in here now would have fit in really well back then.

I don't know if newb actually wanted to be legitimately banned or not.
In hindsight it's a decision I should have spent some more time to ponder... Though, I'd assumed the request legit and not too problematic for him to "come back" anyways.
I guess, I was disappointed because when I see someone, or a few people return for an appearance here and there, every time, every single time I hope it's to stay and maybe bring back a bit of what kept us all here in the first place.

So maybe I just went on "fuck it" mode, took the request with something of a heavy heart, because I don't know...I see no way of fixing this forum at all, and now we have no way of new members signing up at all...and now, it's just another step further away from where it was.


Back to random shit I guess

Went into the gym today and saw my PT.
He actually wants me to aim to train less than I'd intended to, to kind of work up my attendance. I get that, to a point.
He's writing my up a new programme to follow as well, and we're going to go every 2 months to get a check up and adjust programme.
I loved doing the 100 years of horror compilation. that was a blast!

You doing PT... coming back from an injury?

[Morningriser]

I was probably a member of Bloody Disgusting longer than anywhere and made a lot of friends there and even met the filmmaker Lucifer Valentine through the message board. There are admins there who abused their power though and as everyone knows, in places like these which are usually full of perverted nerdy guys oh, it doesn't take very much influence from women to sway people in whatever Direction they want them to. I honestly hated that kind of shit because I have always been the type of person who won't just sit there saying thank you sir may I have another because I'm not two-dimensional like that. I am narcissistic, yes, but not in the kind of way someone sadistic who uses other people's suffering to improve their self-esteem and Public Image. It's an uncontrollable ego trip which open the floodgates to a superiority complex. It's okay to believe in yourself and freely speak your mind, that is the kind of narcissism that actually attracts people, or one of the main qualities of the alpha male for a lack of a better term, but when people are so full of themselves and are able to easily manipulate people and feed off of their emotions like vampires which makes them stronger individually and socially. Narcissistic nihilists quite frankly scared the hell out of me.

Anyway, yeah, ain't nobody got time for that...

[cheebacheeba]

I loved doing the 100 years of horror compilation. that was a blast!
I remember seeing it, never took part personally but yeah...was huge.

You doing PT... coming back from an injury?
No, just a personal trainer appointment/session.
I'm not coming back from an injury, just coming back.

[Freak]

Ah yes the glory days of old. I don’t visit as often as I should but every time I think of this place all my memories are happy. I think one of the ones that sticks out most to me was “the package” fiasco which I was a part of, even though I hate to admit it.

And the other was one particular member who thought we were all out to get him and even went to different message boards telling people that.

But all in all I think social media paired with the sites owner just not caring about the place would be the biggest reason this place is where it is today. I can say proudly I spent many nights and days here giving and receiving some fantastic recommendations for horror movies. I just hope the site continues to endure for many more years to come.

[cheebacheeba]

And the other was one particular member who thought we were all out to get him and even went to different message boards telling people that.

Was that "The Return" by any chance? Had like an penguin avatar?


I just hope the site continues to endure for many more years to come.
Well, I'm here. You're here. Margarine is here. The "new crew" of regular posters is here and for the better part they're actually alright.
We're just...smaller.

[Bloof]

Lol, i remember an outstanding time for me even though I've only been here for a few years. When Michael Myers went on his search for the Wendigo. Loved it.

[Morningriser]

We just need to face the fact that social media has killed the message boards. It's only the True Grit like us who still use them. At least it separates us from others and shows our commitment to the genre and our fandom.

[Sculpt]

So newb was banned
Thank god for that
Was a dinosaur
An somewhat of a brat
...
Newb was a time long ago
A time that has come to pass
So I’ll also join him and say
“zwoti....feel free to ban my ass.”
Excellent poem, newb! Good to have multiple accounts. By the last two lines, I guess there's still plenty more. ::big grin::
I remember seeing it, never took part personally but yeah...was huge.

No, just a personal trainer appointment/session.
I'm not coming back from an injury, just coming back.
Oh yeah, great discussions and debate. I still remember Neverending went off on the suggestion of King Kong 76 for the 70s, how it was an insult to the 33' version, and The Villain or someone was like, 'this is a 70s comparison, and 76' was pretty good'. ::big grin:: The discussions are probably better reading than the compilation.

Oh, PT, personal trainer, I thought it was physical therapy.

[Sculpt]

Ah yes the glory days of old. I don’t visit as often as I should but every time I think of this place all my memories are happy. I think one of the ones that sticks out most to me was “the package” fiasco which I was a part of, even though I hate to admit it.
Tell us a little about 'the package', sounds hilarious.

Lol, i remember an outstanding time for me even though I've only been here for a few years. When Michael Myers went on his search for the Wendigo. Loved it.
Oh ya, I remember that. Dude was camping out in the woods in the winter snow, and had some encounters with a creature; I think he even said he shot at it in the dark of night. ::devil::

[Marley's Ghost]

Excellent poem, newb! Good to have multiple accounts. By the last two lines, I guess there's still plenty more. ::big grin::



I NO NOT OF WHAT YOU SPEAK
THESE WORDS TO ME A MYSTERY
I'M MARLEY'S GHOST AS YOU CAN SEE
AND NEWB I GUESS IS HISTORY

[cheebacheeba]

Tell us a little about 'the package', sounds hilarious.
It's funny, I'd have figured you were here then...it's actually pretty amazing how many years this place has been around.

It was basically a package of random items. DVDs, some movie/tv related stuff, some little toys, collectables and posters etc.
The idea, if I recall correctly was to take out an item or two, put in an item or two, so this package would be sent between members and people would kind of get stuff, give stuff.
I live in Australia and I don't think it ever made its was over/near here.
Not entirely sure where/why the wheels came off...it was successful for a little bit, and then there were delays in sending, and I guess eventually someone just said "fuck it".

It was a decent idea.

[Freak]

Was that "The Return" by any chance? Had like an penguin avatar?

No the guy I’m thinking of was named Festus or something like that. I remember The Return but don’t recall anything like that happening with him. Could be wrong though.

Yes I believe Gore delayed it for a time then I too also delayed it for some time. I did send but don’t remember to who and I don’t remember who had it last.

[cheebacheeba]

No the guy I’m thinking of was named Festus or something like that. I remember The Return but don’t recall anything like that happening with him. Could be wrong though.

I remember that name, or something similar...not sure bout the incident though, but with me, I dunno, if I wasn't involved it's like remembering an advertisement I drove by a while ago.

So I got my gym programme today.
Seems easy enough. Time to adhere.

[hammerfan]

It's funny, I'd have figured you were here then...it's actually pretty amazing how many years this place has been around.

It was basically a package of random items. DVDs, some movie/tv related stuff, some little toys, collectables and posters etc.
The idea, if I recall correctly was to take out an item or two, put in an item or two, so this package would be sent between members and people would kind of get stuff, give stuff.
I live in Australia and I don't think it ever made its was over/near here.
Not entirely sure where/why the wheels came off...it was successful for a little bit, and then there were delays in sending, and I guess eventually someone just said "fuck it".

It was a decent idea.

Yeah, I never received it

[Morningriser]

Has anyone seen that new Snickers commercial with Elton John? Is it just me or is that totally homophobic? I mean the message they are giving off is when a rapper gets hungry he becomes Elton John singing "don't go breaking my heart" and his friend next to him tells him to eat a Snickers because he gets weird when he's hungry. So the rapper eats the Snickers and then starts rapping about women. To me that is more or less telling the guy he acts gay when he is hungry and they are saying it in a negative way as if it is an insult. Maybe I am just overthinking it but I'm surprised with all the shit going on over at Gillette commercial, no one else has seemed to notice this about the Snickers commercial. I assume Elton John had no problem with it but still...

[Sculpt]

It's funny, I'd have figured you were here then...it's actually pretty amazing how many years this place has been around.

It was basically a package of random items. DVDs, some movie/tv related stuff, some little toys, collectables and posters etc.
The idea, if I recall correctly was to take out an item or two, put in an item or two, so this package would be sent between members and people would kind of get stuff, give stuff.
I live in Australia and I don't think it ever made its was over/near here.
Not entirely sure where/why the wheels came off...it was successful for a little bit, and then there were delays in sending, and I guess eventually someone just said "fuck it".

It was a decent idea.
So it would be a box of horror film related stuff that HDC members would mail to each other, take something and add something. That is a nifty idea.

Ah yes the glory days of old. I don’t visit as often as I should but every time I think of this place all my memories are happy. I think one of the ones that sticks out most to me was “the package” fiasco which I was a part of, even though I hate to admit it.

And the other was one particular member who thought we were all out to get him and even went to different message boards telling people that.
So I get the package concept. What was fiasco, just someone not sending it along, or some interesting things in the box? ::big grin::

So I got my gym programme today.
Seems easy enough. Time to adhere.
Cool, you doing the morning or 'after work' program? From experience, if you can really notch it into a schedule you don't give yourself an option, then it works well.

Like I took my walking shoes, and clothes/coat, to work with me, and went straight from work to walk. If I stopped at home first... there would be problems...

[Sculpt]

Has anyone seen that new Snickers commercial with Elton John? Is it just me or is that totally homophobic? I mean the message they are giving off is when a rapper gets hungry he becomes Elton John singing "don't go breaking my heart" and his friend next to him tells him to eat a Snickers because he gets weird when he's hungry. So the rapper eats the Snickers and then starts rapping about women. To me that is more or less telling the guy he acts gay when he is hungry and they are saying it in a negative way as if it is an insult. Maybe I am just overthinking it but I'm surprised with all the shit going on over at Gillette commercial, no one else has seemed to notice this about the Snickers commercial. I assume Elton John had no problem with it but still...
Yes! That was exactly my impression as well. Not sure what Elton's take on the commercial was... I assumed he was cool with kidding around with it.

Just looked at the Gillette commercial. I don't get why anyone would have a problem with it. Stop a fight, or bullying attack, or sexual harassment attack, that's what a good men would do, nothing strange about that. I just assume some agent provocateurs will use it to get some media exposure.

There was one part that was odd, or poorly shot... where a chic in tight clothes walks by on the sidewalk and a dude started to walk off to go talk to her, and another dude blocks him and says, "Bro, not cool, not cool". I don't know why it would be wrong to meet a lady on the sidewalk... I assume the writer or director meant to show a guy, stopping another guy harassing a lady on the street, but they didn't get to that... such as showing the guy catcall obscenities, or go up to her ask something obscene, or brab at her. Too bad they screwed up that part... unless I'm missing something?

[Bloof]

Has anyone seen that new Snickers commercial with Elton John? Is it just me or is that totally homophobic? I mean the message they are giving off is when a rapper gets hungry he becomes Elton John singing "don't go breaking my heart" and his friend next to him tells him to eat a Snickers because he gets weird when he's hungry. So the rapper eats the Snickers and then starts rapping about women. To me that is more or less telling the guy he acts gay when he is hungry and they are saying it in a negative way as if it is an insult. Maybe I am just overthinking it but I'm surprised with all the shit going on over at Gillette commercial, no one else has seemed to notice this about the Snickers commercial. I assume Elton John had no problem with it but still...

Never thought it was a gay thing at all. Just that their music styles are so different and the rapper is not acting like himself. The gillette commercial...i coundnt figure out what the heck they were talking about.

[cheebacheeba]

Yeah, I never received it

LOL. Too easy.

[cheebacheeba]

So I get the package concept. What was fiasco, just someone not sending it along, or some interesting things in the box
Just failure to adhere for one reason or another.
You ask me, unless you had the necessary funds to ship it back out, or a kind of group fund was established and completed to get it in or out of your area...no dice...it would, sadly, need to be one of those "can you afford this?" questions, and well...nobody wants to have to ask that.

So it would be a box of horror film related stuff that HDC members would mail to each other, take something and add something. That is a nifty idea.

I gather that was the idea yeah, though not even exclusively horror related stuff.
Liked the idea.
Damn, the amount of random shit I have in my place...would love to have contributed, but it never came this way. (I guess if ever it starts up again...)

I think...when you leave things with humans and it's not obligatory...they let things slide. Of course, I guess whoever "just kept it" in the end was who really let the team down. ::sad::

I guess the only thing we could do is establish an HDC buy/trade page.
That's on you guys if you wanna - I don't set things up.
"I'll allow it". ::big grin::



So on the gilette commercial thing, I don't find the ad in poor taste at all...though really the one I saw was bloody waaaay too long - is this one they show at the cinema before a film or something?
I get what they're trying to do, and look, it's a message all "men" shouldn't really need public reminders of...yknow...act like people.
I think the main issue some people may take is that it's kind of "jumping on board the bandwagon" (a little late) but it's kind of coming across as a bit of a transparent marketing move?
Good that they're reflecting a positive attitude and, if it's still ok to say, being a gentleman though...but yeah...this is what I see as the issue some people are taking with it.
Me? Don't give a shit personally.


Cool, you doing the morning or 'after work' program? From experience, if you can really notch it into a schedule you don't give yourself an option, then it works well.
Not working right now, just enjoying the kids last year of no school - I manage financially ;)
Though I do prefer to go in the morning.
While I was working, I went prior to work at about 6:30am.
Now?
I wake up sometime between 8-9, have some tea and food, shake myself awake some and head to the gym shortly after that.
I think for me? Psychologically, I don't like "waiting", I don't like "looking forward to it" like literally the lazy part of me gets stronger sway throughout the day...so if I want to adhere? Yes. It's one of the first things I do in the day.
You tend to feel better and more awake too for the rest of the day - this was always a problem when I went at night, because I'd be so wired I wouldn't be able to sleep for hours.

[Morningriser]

Yes! That was exactly my impression as well. Not sure what Elton's take on the commercial was... I assumed he was cool with kidding around with it.

Just looked at the Gillette commercial. I don't get why anyone would have a problem with it. Stop a fight, or bullying attack, or sexual harassment attack, that's what a good men would do, nothing strange about that. I just assume some agent provocateurs will use it to get some media exposure.

There was one part that was odd, or poorly shot... where a chic in tight clothes walks by on the sidewalk and a dude started to walk off to go talk to her, and another dude blocks him and says, "Bro, not cool, not cool". I don't know why it would be wrong to meet a lady on the sidewalk... I assume the writer or director meant to show a guy, stopping another guy harassing a lady on the street, but they didn't get to that... such as showing the guy catcall obscenities, or go up to her ask something obscene, or brab at her. Too bad they screwed up that part... unless I'm missing something?
There's a lot of shit people make a big deal out of and I don't understand why. I don't understand the whole Nike thing. I do however feel like the Snickers thing was a bit derogatory though. There was this very bizarre holiday commercial for a local Furniture Company here in Vegas that only aired for about a week. In the commercial the guy who owns the store was wishing a merry Christmas to all these different races and then this Asian guy, among a bunch of other people who I guess we're employees were standing there and he looks over at the bus and smiles and the boss says nobody likes those people. Then at the very end it showed some other guy all together walking away and the boss said his name and wait. It's like it was an outtake added to the end of the commercial but apparently that remark must have pissed someone off or they tried to make it look that way anyway. Considering it only lasted for about a week though I'm sure someone took issue with it.

[Sculpt]

Just failure to adhere for one reason or another.
You ask me, unless you had the necessary funds to ship it back out, or a kind of group fund was established and completed to get it in or out of your area...no dice...it would, sadly, need to be one of those "can you afford this?" questions, and well...nobody wants to have to ask that.

I wake up sometime between 8-9, have some tea and food, shake myself awake some and head to the gym shortly after that.
I think for me? Psychologically, I don't like "waiting", I don't like "looking forward to it" like literally the lazy part of me gets stronger sway throughout the day...so if I want to adhere? Yes. It's one of the first things I do in the day.
You tend to feel better and more awake too for the rest of the day - this was always a problem when I went at night, because I'd be so wired I wouldn't be able to sleep for hours.
Yeah, I would wonder about the cost of mailing a box to Australia... have no idea what it would cost, but that might make me pause. But it's a one time deal, I think I wouldn't sneeze at something at or below $20 US dollars.

That's cool you go in the morning. That is a great way to start the day, boost that awakeness and energy all day. I would have to adjust going to a gym at 5AM or whatever before work. But it is cool to workout, take a shower and start your day.

There's a lot of shit people make a big deal out of and I don't understand why. I don't understand the whole Nike thing. I do however feel like the Snickers thing was a bit derogatory though. There was this very bizarre holiday commercial for a local Furniture Company here in Vegas that only aired for about a week. In the commercial the guy who owns the store was wishing a merry Christmas to all these different races and then this Asian guy, among a bunch of other people who I guess we're employees were standing there and he looks over at the bus and smiles and the boss says nobody likes those people. Then at the very end it showed some other guy all together walking away and the boss said his name and wait. It's like it was an outtake added to the end of the commercial but apparently that remark must have pissed someone off or they tried to make it look that way anyway. Considering it only lasted for about a week though I'm sure someone took issue with it.
Link the Snicker commercial. I don't know that one.

[Sculpt]

Never thought it was a gay thing at all. Just that their music styles are so different and the rapper is not acting like himself. The gillette commercial...i coundnt figure out what the heck they were talking about.
LOL Ya, you're probably right. Maybe that's because your mind is in the right place, and mine is not. I'm sure you're right, that was the intention, but there was extra issues that both I and Morn picked up. Actually, I think I saw it on youtube, and turned to a buddy and he thought what I thought. The extra things, that Morn pointed out, Elton is gay, and the rapper, after eating the candybar, started rapping a 'get the lady rap'. I mean, call my mind in the wrong place and all, but the creator of the commercial has to see the big picture.

[Morningriser]

z48ELAsct2w

[Morningriser]

Holy shit... I know I shouldn't be laughing at these but oh my god. When I was looking for that furniture store commercial that came across these two.

xf6qjHREqGo

MArsmQ9tGN0

[Bloof]

LOL Ya, you're probably right. Maybe that's because your mind is in the right place, and mine is not. I'm sure you're right, that was the intention, but there was extra issues that both I and Morn picked up. Actually, I think I saw it on youtube, and turned to a buddy and he thought what I thought. The extra things, that Morn pointed out, Elton is gay, and the rapper, after eating the candybar, started rapping a 'get the lady rap'. I mean, call my mind in the wrong place and all, but the creator of the commercial has to see the big picture.

I really dont think Elton John would participate in gay bashing of any type. Unless he thought it was funny and harmless. You mentioned not understanding why one guy stopped another guy from following a girl with tight clothes. I think they are trying to say just because a girl dresses like that doesn't mean she's asking for it.

[Bloof]

I won't start a thread unless any interest is expressed but that package thing got me thinking. Why don't we do an online one. I could take a pic of some random thing in my house, maybe explain a little bit and post it. Than someone else can do one. Doesnt have to be horror related. Something you are proud of, something you use everyday, a pet etc etc. Anyone?

[Sculpt]

I really dont think Elton John would participate in gay bashing of any type. Unless he thought it was funny and harmless. You mentioned not understanding why one guy stopped another guy from following a girl with tight clothes. I think they are trying to say just because a girl dresses like that doesn't mean she's asking for it.
I think that's what they were trying to say too, considering the context. She could be dressed like that for a lot of reasons, including a hope a that a fellow introduces himself to her on the sidewalk, or wherever she was going. I just think they messed up that spot.

I won't start a thread unless any interest is expressed but that package thing got me thinking. Why don't we do an online one. I could take a pic of some random thing in my house, maybe explain a little bit and post it. Than someone else can do one. Doesnt have to be horror related. Something you are proud of, something you use everyday, a pet etc etc. Anyone?
If you post a pet I like, can you mail it to me?

[Bloof]

I think that's what they were trying to say too, considering the context. She could be dressed like that for a lot of reasons, including a hope a that a fellow introduces himself to her on the sidewalk, or wherever she was going. I just think they messed up that spot.


If you post a pet I like, can you mail it to me?

::shocked::

[hammerfan]

::shocked::

The cute! It's overwhelming! ::shocked::

[Bloof]

The cute! It's overwhelming! ::shocked::

Right?? They look like baby falcors from Neverending Story.

[Sculpt]

They do look like the baby falkor from neverending story. Boxem' up! ::love::

[Morningriser]

I love Falcor! The cutest dragon that doesn't look anything like a dragon I've ever seen in my life!

[Morningriser]

Eyes

There's Beauty in this world can't you see?
From the bottomless oceans to the endless Skies
All is seen, all is free
Just open your eyes

The meaning of life has become clear to me
We are meant to breed and spread our seed
We are stewards to Mother Earth forever more
To protect, preserve and carefully restore

The spiral of life will never end
Despite all the twists, turns and joyous bends
We are one with the universe and spin as a whole
Waiting for something whilst we grow old
There is a balance amongst all that you know
Where one can learn to live, love and grow
The spirit world Waits For You with open arms
It wants to guide you and prevent harm

Let Yourself Go and open your eyes
Open your mind and see beyond the lies
You have a voice, defend your prize
The answers are there if you choose to see
What truly is and what can never be

[Bloof]

Very nice, Morning. Did you write this?

[Morningriser]

Yeah I did. Thank you! I haven't really wrote much in a long time but lately I've been writing a little more as far as poetry goes. There's certain fires I used to have burning bright and hot that have been pretty tame over the years. Perhaps it's time to ignite a spark?

Could someone please explain to me why the term neckbeard is an insult? Was this made up by gay men or very feminine men that can't grow a beard thus they need their own security blanket by insulting people who are more masculine than they are? Yeah I have a full beard and I just got called a neckbeard by a guy with long frizzy pink hair wearing very gay looking fingerless gloves. So that's why I wonder if this is just something that jealous fruity cartoonies use to insult guys who actually are men. I'm not bashing gay people, I just find it kind of funny.

[Morningriser]

I have been working on this off and on ever since my psychedelic experience. This is what I saw before I was pulled in.

[Morningriser]

Can I ask you guys a question and get some feedback?

Let's say you have a grandfather who was born and raised in the mountains of Southwest Virginia where I grew up at, and then you have me who came from St Louis and the point being we both came from different worlds, me the city and him the country.

Now let's say out of relative obligation, he has helped me financially but other than that never attempted to develop an emotional bond with me and anytime I would try to talk to him about my feelings I would immediately be silenced and ridiculed and made to feel like I am a pussy for displaying my emotions or feeling sorry for myself.

Growing up I made so many attempts to bond with him and the rest of my family to no avail. When I was a teenager my mother abandoned me and my grandparents took me in for three years because I wouldn't have had anywhere else to go. My grandmother was very compassionate and of all of her grandkids I do think I was her favorite but my grandfather never really saw it that way. I moved to Virginia right after my father killed himself and was a mess, a shell which for a nine-year-old child is not normal or healthy but instead of trying to get me help or find out what was wrong with me, they just sent me to school everyday where the new kid who talked funny got the hell beat out of them just for being fat with glasses and talking funny. I would go home sometimes crying which I know sounds weird for a boy but still, it got to me that much, and my grandmother's excuse was, you only have five years of school left, for years 3 years 2 years and so on as if that's going to make it better. I had so many opportunities to go out with friends and have a social life but they both held me back, why I don't know but because of this I never made any friends and I was a loner and being a loner I never had anyone to talk to about my feelings so I kept everything bottled up inside my entire life only letting things drip from time to time to once again be told by my grandfather to stop feeling sorry for myself. He never offered anything else other than don't feel sorry for yourself. Nothing on how to try to teach myself to get over feeling that way but don't feel sorry for myself.

Now that I have gotten all of that out of the way, my question here is, despite all he has done for me financially, helping me move to Vegas, letting me stay in my mom's house when I had nowhere else to go, and even a few years ago when I had to go to court with my ex, he drove me 4 hours to where I had to go. With all of that said, does it make me a bad guy to cut him out of my life? He is the most positive influence on my life that still living. He's only been one of two major positive influences, the other being my grandmother. I know he feels something because he's helping me but it feels more like obligation than because he truly wants to help me. Money doesn't mean love though and the fact that anytime I try to talk to him about my problems or issues or about anything deep he immediately Cuts me off.

Am I wrong for closing that chapter of my life? Since moving here eight months ago I have progressed so much internally. It's not just from the drugs, it's just getting a loan and having to rely on myself 100%. I was scared to be alone at first but now I treasure this time because I have grown so much in such a short amount of time that it is so astonishing that the human brain can do this. I have a long way to go before I would consider myself fully 100% comfortable with who I am but I am well on my way there. I guess I just felt guilt for telling my grandpa how I feel like he has treated me or along with the rest of the family and I told him that I just can't do this anymore because they make me feel like I should be ashamed of who I am, or what I like even. Hell, there was one time my ex and I went to this place called WonderWorks when we were in Orlando and if you have ever been to one, it's this huge interactive arcade and they even had this one exhibit where you could lay on a bed of nails. You late on this big table with a bunch of holes in it and push the button and the nails all come up at once and lift you up and it didn't hurt or anything and even kids could do it but when I told my grandmother I did it, being all excited about it, she told me I am a disgrace to the family.

I'm still trying to figure out how I never blew my brains out.

[Sculpt]

Yeah I did. Thank you! I haven't really wrote much in a long time but lately I've been writing a little more as far as poetry goes. There's certain fires I used to have burning bright and hot that have been pretty tame over the years. Perhaps it's time to ignite a spark?

Could someone please explain to me why the term neckbeard is an insult? Was this made up by gay men or very feminine men that can't grow a beard thus they need their own security blanket by insulting people who are more masculine than they are? Yeah I have a full beard and I just got called a neckbeard by a guy with long frizzy pink hair wearing very gay looking fingerless gloves. So that's why I wonder if this is just something that jealous fruity cartoonies use to insult guys who actually are men. I'm not bashing gay people, I just find it kind of funny.
Yes, I can address the neckbeard thing. I first ran into it when a couple of online forum Bears fans derogatorily called the QB Kyle Orton 'neckbeard'. Personally, I don't think it's something dudes would bother talking about each other. There's evidently a customary way to cut the beard which ends at the bottom or underneath the jaw line and no hair on the neck. In this, hair on the neck would be considered unkempt, disheveled... something unintended and disregarded. It's not that hair on the neck can't be a grooming choice, it wouldn't be a common one, but there you go.

I have been working on this off and on ever since my psychedelic experience. This is what I saw before I was pulled in.
What did you do that with? It's really good. I like it.

[Bloof]

Morning, I feel that you're grandfather was raised in a different time and a different way. No surprise there. But somehow from what you said, i feel he loves you because he "does right" by you. Thats his way of showing love. But if you feel you want to move on then go for it. Be cordial if they do contact you but dont initiate any contact.

[Sculpt]

Can I ask you guys a question and get some feedback? Am I wrong for closing that chapter of my life? Since moving here eight months ago I have progressed so much internally. It's not just from the drugs, it's just getting a loan and having to rely on myself 100%. I was scared to be alone at first but now I treasure this time because I have grown so much in such a short amount of time that it is so astonishing that the human brain can do this. I have a long way to go before I would consider myself fully 100% comfortable with who I am but I am well on my way there. I guess I just felt guilt for telling my grandpa how I feel like he has treated me or along with the rest of the family and I told him that I just can't do this anymore because they make me feel like I should be ashamed of who I am, or what I like even.
Are the grandparents you're referring to your dad or mom's parents?

Yes, you would be wrong to cut your grandfather off. No question. He's family, and it doesn't sound like you have a ton of family. You know one person can't be everything for you. Everybody has their deficits. It's not unusual that a grandfather doesn't want to talk about feelings, or in particular doesn't want to engage you when he thinks you're complaining. He likely finds a personal rock in family duty, that's motivating and precious to him, and he'd like to instill that in you. He might not have much 'feelings' talk in him, it's hard to know what people have and what's really difficult for them, just believe he does what he can, he's shown you he loves you, he's helped you out, don't allow yourself to see him as not good enough, that would be hypocritical of you, something you've accused him and your grandma doing to you. Were all just people.

And actually, you're forgetting something, it's their job to be 'parental/disciplinary/critical' to you, especially since they know your parents aren't there for you. You on the other hand don't have an obligation to be 'parental' to them. Your family duty to them is upcoming, when they are going to need family to watch out for them in their old age.

If your grandpa doesn't want to talk about feelings, or about you talking about hardship, that's fine, that's not his area. Instead, talk to him about the positive things, the positive changes, things you've achieved and are thinking about achieving. This might be his area, he might have a lot to share with you in that area. Great time to try it out.

[Morningriser]

Yes, I can address the neckbeard thing. I first ran into it when a couple of online forum Bears fans derogatorily called the QB Kyle Orton 'neckbeard'. Personally, I don't think it's something dudes would bother talking about each other. There's evidently a customary way to cut the beard which ends at the bottom or underneath the jaw line and no hair on the neck. In this, hair on the neck would be considered unkempt, disheveled... something unintended and disregarded. It's not that hair on the neck can't be a grooming choice, it wouldn't be a common one, but there you go.


What did you do that with? It's really good. I like it.

Photoshop haha. I wish I could paint stuff like that but I've never been good at it. I've always been decent with Photoshop though. I worked on that off and on little by little because I didn't want to get in a rush and mess it up. Now that I'm done with it I still see more that I could do but for the most part that's what took me Beyond. I've been doing some research and I think that might actually be my spirit animal. Dragons represent balance and are very wise, Brave, and nurturing but can also fight with everything in them for what they believe in.

[Morningriser]

My grandparents I'm talking about are my mother's parents and yes, I don't have much family. My father's family has nothing to do with me and my mother's brother and his whole family have nothing to do with me either. I understand completely or everyone is coming from about how he was raised and how he shows emotions but at the same time I feel like he is showing so much favoritism towards these people who used to make fun of my mother for being an alcoholic, for the fact that my cousin, who is in her 30s, still buys alcohol for high school kids she has no connection with simply so she can stay popular amongst teenagers in a town she grew up in that she doesn't even live in anymore because she moved a whole state away but her popularity is still something she needs to keep for some reason. It's shit like that, they act like they're so fucking great and every little thing I do is held against me and anytime I try to defend myself or speak out against them for it my grandfather makes me feel like I should be completely ashamed of myself. I am so sick of living in a fucking world where people can do and say what they want to me but the minute I try to defend myself I get shut down for it.

Any way, I understand everything both of you said and I love my grandpa, I really do but you have to understand that they held me back so much it totally fuck me up. They had me believing the world was this one certain way when it wasn't. I was young and damaged and basically anybody that wanted to take a hold of me and manipulate me in any way they wanted could. I was way too naive and gullible and too afraid to think for myself and stand up for myself until all the damage was done and now in the last eight months I have been working on 37 years of damage that was all done because people like my grandparents made me feel like I was a freak, the music I listen to was bad and dangerous and not allowed in their house and the clothing I wore was highly offencive for Christians or to be seen by Christian eyes. But yet being in your thirties and supplying children you don't even really know with alcohol just to stay popular with high school kids it's not only illegal as fuck but apparently a good thing if my grandpa is going to get pissed off at me for bringing that up. I guess that he probably just doesn't want us fighting with each other but like I said, they are the perfect family and I'm the fucking Whipping Boy. I have always been but not anymore. I had blocked him on Facebook but I unblocked him and apologized and explained to him how I feel exactly like I have done so many times before so I'm just waiting for him to get back online and bitched me out or block me or do one of the few other generic things he does as long as he doesn't have to tell me how he actually feels.

[Morningriser]

I guess yesterday I didn't get things out of the clear as I should have. I don't want to cut my grandpa out of my life but he has done a lot of damage to me. For example, my grandmother was dead for two days before he even told me despite the fact that she was more of a mother to me than my own was and since I didn't know she was dead, my girlfriend at the time and I had went about 7 hours away to the beach and had just got there that night, the night before the funeral, we were both exhausted and had a very tired and very agitated baby with us and because I couldn't make it back to the funeral in time, most of the family despises me because of it. And another thing, when I was a child, my mother was with this crazy ass redneck who beat the holy fuck out of both of us almost every day and my grandparents knew what was going on but they never stepped in until the proof stare them right in the face and they couldn't ignore anymore, my blood all over the floor and walls in my mom's house from when he damn near killed me, and the proof all over my face which they could no longer ignore because it had gotten out what had happened so they had to actually take action. I guess I forgot to leave those things out yesterday as to why I hold so much hatred and anger and built-up negative energy about this. It's like I'm the one they all focused their bad feelings on, not just my grandpa but my entire family who won't even tell me why they don't like me and leave me to believe it's because I wasn't as popular as my cousins. I know that sounds ridiculous but in a town like Grundy Virginia, that's actually religion. Last night I sent my grandpa a pretty lengthy message on Facebook explaining to him why I felt why I did and since nobody seems to care about throwing shit in my face and trying to make me feel bad I reminded him that they just let me get beaten almost to death and then didn't even tell me about my grandmother dying until I messaged him two days later and asked him how she was doing before I even found out anyting. I even told him that I hope he does feel like shit for once because somebody other than me deserves to. And you know what? I actually feel great about it. I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. And I am not sorry in the least bit for what I said either.

Edit: I don't want anyone to think I'm depressed or on the verge of a breakdown or anything because I kind of realized that's how this sounds. I am fine as far as that goes while I will admit I am a bit frustrated though. I have done a lot of internal evolving since I got out of Virginia in such a short time that it is quite astonishing actually. I know the psychedelics have a lot to do with how I'm able to start putting things into perspective and work towards finding an internal balance between my fiercely aggressive passion or the fact that I can be a straight-up hothead sometimes and my overly sensitive side that has let so many people take advantage of me for so long and find a way where I can make the good work with the bad in a way that makes me able to empathize but also protect and defend without fear that was there before but doesn't seem to be now.

[Morningriser]

Well I was going to wait until somebody else posted in this damn thread before I posted anything else, but I'm too fucking excited about this one. This time seven years ago I weighed 350 lb. 8 months ago I weighed 220 lb. 3 months ago I weighed 200 lb. And today...

[hammerfan]

Well I was going to wait until somebody else posted in this damn thread before I posted anything else, but I'm too fucking excited about this one. This time seven years ago I weighed 350 lb. 8 months ago I weighed 220 lb. 3 months ago I weighed 200 lb. And today...

Congratulations!

[Morningriser]

Thank you! I was so damn excited yesterday! This is the first time I have been under 200 lb in like 25 years so this was an emotional and very exciting and rewarding moment for me.

[cheebacheeba]

Props, man.

[Morningriser]

Props, man.

Thanks cheebs! I have been so damn proud of myself lately. I mean since I have moved out here my life has completely started turning around in such a positive way. I'm physically healthier, I have reached a point of subconscious understanding where I am able to deal with and let go of things from my past.

I've been stressed a little lately though because every time I get on Facebook all I see are Donald Trump supporters and haters blowing up on each other just for saying hello and me being extremely empathic as is, it breaks my heart to see the way our own people are treating each other when our government is purposely trying to destroy us.

Anyway, back on point, I have noticed myself gaining so much more confidence as of late like my psychedelic experience at the beginning of the month has put my brain in this beautiful overdrive and has begun reconstructing my ego to make me stronger, more confident and far less passive than I have ever been. I love this new me! I can still get worked up and be a hothead at times but I'm working on finding a balance between my aggressive side and my sensitive side.

I kind of wish now I had never asked on here the other day about the whole thing with my grandpa because I realized that if I had to ask here, without being able to make the decision on my own, then the answer was no, I shouldn't cut my grandfather out of my life. However, a lot from my past I buried away in my subconscious has been coming back to me lately of things my grandfather did to me in the past or things he neglected to do that he could have and I just realized that he really doesn't give a shit about me beyond his self interpreted obligations as my grandfather, which I believe is a promise he was making to either my mother or my grandmother to not let anything happen to me. For example, when I was still in high school, I went with my mom and her husband out to Bristol, Tennessee, which is about two and a half hours from where I used to live. They got arrested for being drunk in public and my grandparents had to come get me. The entire way home my grandfather yelled and screamed at like everything was my fault which he had never done, and scared the hell out of my grandmother, which I had never seen him do. Then, when I was younger than that, my mother was with a guy who beat the fuck out of both of us on a regular basis and my grandparents knew it but they never stepped in until there was a night when her boyfriend busted my face up really bad. It was horribly bruised, both of my eyes were blackened, and I had a huge gash on my chin. My blood was all over the place in my mother's house and would you know it, since there was physical evidence of the abuse, my grandparents decided to step in and save face. Then as if that's not enough, when my grandmother died, it was on a Friday, and everybody knew that my girlfriend at the time and I were driving down to Myrtle Beach on that Sunday. No one called or messaged me on Facebook or emailed me to tell me that my grandmother had died. I didn't know anything happened at all until we got to the beach late Sunday night and I sent my grandfather a message on Facebook and asked him how she was doing and he told me she died Friday and her funeral was that next morning. There was no way in hell we would have had enough time to get back and we were exhausted on top of that so I didn't get to go to the funeral and now everyone hates me for it. Even my mother, who actually died six months later from drinking herself to death, threatened to kill me if she ever saw me again.

So I tried talking to my grandfather about this and telling him how I felt and how I feel like he has treated me and not only would he never let me even get anything out, all he could ever tell me is that everything was in my head which I am not stupid and it insults my intelligence so much that he would not only refuse to own up to all the shit he has done to me, but to say that I'm making it up? Hell, I've even been talking to my best friend since the fourth grade about this and even he had seen the things that were going on but he just never wanted to tell me because he knew I probably wouldn't believe him and would end up despising him for it, and he's right. I always held my grandfather on this pedestal like he was the greatest thing ever. I looked at him as my real father because he has done more for me then my real father or mother ever
did for me. It is true he has helped me out so much but giving someone money and helping them out financially, and loving them and showing them you care are two completely different things. So needless to say, after I told him how I felt he blocked me on Facebook. They never accepted me. They all hated my father and my father's family because of the way my father treated my mother. He put her in the hospital so many times and he even raped my babysitter which is what led to his suicide basically. My dad's family are pieces of shit. They turn their backs on me years and years ago. They always denied my dad ever laid a hand on her even though I saw so much. Since I came out of that marriage though, I feel like my mother's family despised me because I came from my father. They all knew how much I hurt over the years. I was really close with my cousins before high school. My older cousin, Amy, was a senior when I was a freshman and at school would completely avoid me. Then once I was a senior, my cousin Gregory was a freshman and he avoided me at school. After all of us graduated, they never had anything else to do with me. I mean they would talk to me if I talked to them but that was it and then after my grandmother died the entire family went ghost on me. No matter how many times I tried to talk to them and ask them what they had against me they ignored me. They didn't even acknowledge me. Then when I would talk to my grandfather to try to find something out, like clockwork, it's all in my head and I'm feeling sorry for myself despite the fact that phrase has nothing to do with anything, that was always one of his go to phrases for whatever it was I was trying to talk to him about.

Right now I am very hurt and I am very angry. I guess I always had it in my head because my grandfather was my grandfather, he could do no wrong. I think he counted on me basically staying dumb and with all of my repressed feelings locked away until he was long gone but luckily for me, I am evolving and since I finally stood up to him and tried to get some sort of closure or answer or anyting, it's all in my head. So yeah, fuck him and fuck that family. They are all dead to me and I just need to accept that the only people who ever truly did love me are gone and I will never get them back.