Asylum of the Damned (DVD)

Once in awhile I’m pleasantly surprised when I watch a new horror DVD I’ve never heard of before, starring actors I’ve never seen. Once in a while, mind you. In the case of Asylum of the Damned, the usual low expectations were just barely met.

In a hackneyed plot rife with clichés, Asylum of the Damned tells the story of a young psychology major who just starting his residency at a creepy, isolated insane asylum called St. Andrews. Make that “Satan” Andrews… Within the first 5 minutes, the entire plot is given away when someone tells our young hero James Bishop that the asylum is only a holding area for souls that need to be reaped and taken to Hell.

After that, endless static scenes unspool which show James standing and talking to people, sitting and talking to people, and talking to people on the phone. There are an awful lot of poorly acted, poorly directed, infinitely unimaginative blah-blah-blah discussion and exposition scenes. How many times does the golden rule of “Show, Don’t Tell” have to be drilled into filmmakers’ heads? Evidently, I’m going to have to charge up the old Black & Decker and pay a visit to this director.

There are a few gory scenes for the bloodthirsty horror fans, but they are rendered bland and predictable thanks to a complete lack of suspense. Everything is laid out for you from beginning to end, as if the screenwriter was using a modified Paint-By-Numbers set. The setting and storyline are inherently creepy and compelling, but they aren’t presented in such a way that you care about what happens to James, or anyone else.

The characters are right out of a cookie-cutter factory: James is the idealistic young eager beaver who quickly gets wrapped up in the evil that wanders the asylum’s halls and tries to stop it; the long-time doctor and nurse are totally corrupt; the inmate who’s been there for decades is terrified but so conditioned as a victim, he doesn’t escape even when he gets the chance; and the big, creepy, muscle-bound guy with weird white eyes is a book who can’t be judged by his cover.

If you want to original, refreshing and scary new horror movie, avoid Asylum of the Damned. If you’re desperate for any new horror flick and feel the need to see them all, then proceed at your own risk.

The DVD does not contain any bonus material.

(by Staci Layne Wilson)