Office weapon suggestions?

[kyl3thund3r]

Ok, so, I work in an office for a mobile phone network. I have been asked as part of an application to get a job in training to give a presentation that gets the group (2 team managers and their manager) talking and working together.

I've been told I can use and subject matter I like, as long as I can teach them something from it, and get them involved.

So naturally I chose surviving the zombie apocalypse. Below is the scenario I've set them. I'm trying to plan out most eventualities/answers in advance so that once the discussion is done, I can say "well you could have also tried this", or just help them try and come to answers themselves. The part I'm struggling most with is trying to think of make-shift weapons and body armour in an office. I figured you lot would be the perfect people to ask. The meeting is at 3pm GMT tomorrow, so any ideas you guys have before then would be awesome.

Of course I'll let you all know if it lands me the job or not :)

"Scenario:

There has been a zombie outbreak in Glasgow. All major roads and public transport have been closed. All the attendees of this meeting have been stuck inside the building. We are able to leave, but will not last long outside.

We are going to need to set up camp in the building, and collect everything we will need to survive. There is still electricity in the building, but the water has been shut off.

We have obtained a set of keys and passes that will allow us to open or lock any door in the building. If we plan to loot any of the neighbouring buildings, we will need to make sure we are properly armed and protected.

Ways to communicate with the outside world are quickly dwindling. Mobile networks are frequently jammed, and landlines are down. Although mobile networks are currently running, we can see from the services available to us in the office that our network is gradually losing power in areas across the country, so mobile phones will not be an option for long. You do have access to the internet for the time being.

Nobody knows we are here at present, so signalling for help is as important as food or water.


Things you should consider:

• Zombies can only be stopped by a blow to the head. Should the building be invaded, or you venture outside, how will you protect yourself?
  
• The zombie virus can only be spread through a bite from the infected, or by ingesting their blood. How will you protect yourself against infection?
  
• Zombies can see and smell, but their primary sense is hearing. Keep this in mind when planning anything that may attract their attention.
  
• You will need food and water to last you as long as it takes to help to arrive. Where can you find this and realistically, how long can you survive on the food you find.
  
• How will you fortify the building? You should ensure that there is no way to gain entrance from the outside, and that you have a clear exit strategy should you need it.
  
• How will you signal for help?

"

[Ferox13]

We did a similar team building exercise in the office. I suggested 'A Serbian FIlm' as the scenario. Needless to say I don't work there any more...

[kyl3thund3r]

hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. yeah I kinda need to keep this job, and presenting that to the bosses would go a long way towards seeing that I don't keep it.

[Elvis_Christ]

Do you have a guillotine in your office? Unscrewing the blade and cutting loose with that would be the first thing on my mind :D

Broom handles etc from the cleaning cupboard might be good for some bludgeoning action.

Move desks to block the doors...

[ManchestrMorgue]

Kill the least likeable member of your team, and use them for food. Make a pact with teammates that if you survive, "the zombies did it".

Learn to drink own urine.

[kyl3thund3r]

Originally Posted by Elvis_Christ

Do you have a guillotine in your office? Unscrewing the blade and cutting loose with that would be the first thing on my mind :D

Broom handles etc from the cleaning cupboard might be good for some bludgeoning action.

Move desks to block the doors...

The guillotine was about all I had on there to be honest. That and fire extinguishers. There's a big plant display thing in the reception that has big rocks as well so those are getting used as projectiles. Broom handles are now on the list, as are the desk ideas.

Cheers! I'll let you guys know how it goes.