Drunk and Insane, so I can TOTALLY get away with this shit

[novakru]

So
I am about to be left
My husband and I have been together since 1996
September 13th, 1996 was our first date
We had the lady that introduced us come with us to this crappy, old western bar with fucking LINE DANCING
I hate country/western but goddammit, I HAD A FUCKING blast.


We never really was apart after that, except for a few days here when he had get fresh clothes.


My grandmother died.






My cat is too skinny.
My head hurts if I stop drinking.


I am pathetic.

[GorePhobia]

I am so sorry all this stuff is happening to you. You are a great person and don't deserve to have this shitty stuff happen. I wish you all the best of luck with everything going on and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your loved ones on the passing of your grandmother.

We are all here for you and if you need a shoulder or ear let us know.

I am always here to talk to. I have been through A LOT this year and it helps to have someone to talk to.

[The Flayed One]

Ease into it. One step at a time. Rage when you must, cry when you need to, and heal at your own pace.

Remember, there is always that giant PM option up there for those of us you feel comfortable with. Just in case you need a private session.

[novakru]

THX Gore
You are the man!

Yeah, I go in and out of complete despair because there are many
MANY other things going on in my life I feel very incapable of handling right now.
Then I go through times where I know I will be ok no matter what.
It depends.


It gets better
sometimes

[novakru]

Originally Posted by The Flayed One

Ease into it. One step at a time. Rage when you must, cry when you need to, and heal at your own pace.

Remember, there is always that giant PM option up there for those of us you feel comfortable with. Just in case you need a private session.

I like that...ease into it
Very nice!


I think right now I need attention
hence the thread-lol

I feel in need of many males around me to boost my spirits a little, it is never easy for a woman to realize her man just doesn't dig her anymore.
My husband said he still thinks I am beautiful but I think he fears for all the money he is going to have to pay me.
I am just not the type to go out bar hopping so this man hunt is a bit stalled at the mo.
I had a good time one night after Gumdo practice when 4 of the boys stayed and chatted me.
It's amazing how much males can do for a crushed ego:)

Not that I don't enjoy my girlfriends...it's just a different appeal, you know?
And right now, I am a bit burnt by females...in RL that is....

[Dante'sInferno]

Sorry to hear that.I wish you the best in the future and you know i'm here if you want to talk.:)

[Painfulldeath]

Yeah Nova you're not alone in all of this. Life can give you a pile of shit. It's up to you to shovel it and grass will grow again. That was my way of offering support. :)

Edit: I definitely feel for you. It's not going to be an easy time no matter how positive you look at things. But you know what, you're gonna live through this and hopefully come out of it stronger and even happier than before. If you wanna talk about it I'm sure there are better people to do so but I'm there too. You keep your head up.

[Vodstok]

Just remember, BE CAREFUL. You first guy or two afterward are most likely going to be "rebound guys" and they need to at least have an idea of that. I was the "first guy after the first real relationship" rebound guy for every girl i dated before Bree and it sucks thinking on ething then finding out that you ended up making them feel better for a short time, but they dont need you any more.


that being said, BE CAREFUL...um ER (Carefuller, it should be a word) because for every guy who pays attention because he genuinely cares and wants you to feel better, there are 30 more who think "dude, emotionally fragile chicks are easy pickin's"

[urgeok2]

i dont normally like participating in threads like these because they are depressing - plus i think that the advice people give is the advice people found effective for themselves... there is not much hope that anything anyone says will apply to the person asking for it - nor will they take it even if they do because these threads are more about venting and seeking support.

come to think of it - the 1st post wasnt even asking advice - (but due to the nature of it - advice is given)


that being said ... i'll offer some - this one time - and i wont expect results ... but... just in case...


I'm 47... and recently became aware for the 1st time that we are not immortal.
The clock is ticking - we're racing toward the grave. NOW is the time to be happy - make every second count. I know that some folks - thanks to an unfortunate chemical balance - are incapable of being happy - at least not by choice.. and not on a regular basis.

i have no advice if this is the case ..


however - if the unhappiness derrives from a series of circumstances and events that are proving to be too challenging .... here's what i do: its something i learned from work.

there are times that i get hammered by the sheer amount of work that gets thrown at me ... its a very task oriented job with shifting priorities.
I almost lost my mind about a year and a half ago when my already job and a half workload was effectively doubled .. i nearly lost my mind.

The only thing that saved me was writing things down. When you are being hit in 10 different directions and things are all swirling around in your head - you cant get a fix on anyone thing. you have no goal, no focus, nothing gets resolved or accomplished because you are too overwhealmed.

i started writing task lists - sounds simple - but it worked. I did one thing at a time .. no matter how small - i was able to get a foothold and see progress.

i found that this simple technique worked just as effectively for personal life situations.


what is going wrong .. make a list.
how to tackle each one - sugestions for solutions for each item.



also - what is going right ? .... why am i going through this ?
(most of us will answer : the kid/s)

its nice to see a running list on the other side of the page for balance.

sure - some things are going wrong ... but theres things going right.



i did this for a friend of mine recently.

she has terrible luck with guys .. single mom...

the minus side was obvious ... but she wasnt paying any attention to the positive side.


she's attractive
she has a good job
she lives comfortable in a home in a decent neighbourhood.

i know that when thing suck - it's tough to look around at the people beside you who's lives are a worse hell than yours - and feel lucky about yourself - but it's a nice tool to use to get some perspective. There are people surviving with worse odds against them. how do they do it ? are they just stronger ? are you willing to allow yourself to believe you cant be that strong ?

if so - thats something else i have no advice for ..


but i do believe in itemizing the things that are keeping you from happiness ... and brainstorm each one for a solution. what you come up with might not work ... so you go back and start again. at least something positive is coming out of it, you will know that at least you are attempting to try something ,and things will be resolved sooner or later. progress will be made.

ever problem has a solution. sometimes things are more simple than they seem. but untill you can see the whole picture clearly ... you'll just be spinning in a whirlpool of misery.... and life is too short to spend 5 more minutes like that.

and by the way - alcohol is the worst fucking answer to any problem...

[Papillon Noir]

@Nova

I'm so sorry this had to happen, but there is nothing worse than a one-sided relationship and if he can't see what a wonderful person you are then he isn't worth your time. You will find happiness and someone who treats and loves you the way you should be treated.

Also, get a good lawyer and get him for all he's worth. You'll feel better. :)