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#1
09-28-2007, 06:55 AM
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Annoying inlaws ?
Second topic for me in 3 days... my new record!
So, I've been living with the boyfriend for over 3 months now, and for the most part everything has been going fine... except for his fucking family. We inconveniently live 15-20 mintues away from them by car. And since we've been here, it's been like living with the Gestapo: constant surprise visits, without even calling or asking if it's alright to come. Once we decided not to buzz them in and pretend as if we weren't here... his father pounded on our door for 10 minutes like a maniac after buzzing someone else to let him into the building! His brother is constantly dropping by.. once while it was "business time" (;) ), etc... I know it's like an unspoken rule that inlaws are supposed to get on your nerves, especially the mother in law, but I was so unprepared for this! Anyone else have problems with their inlaws ? Any horror stories of your own ?
__________________
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. Thug means never having to say you're sorry. 
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#3
09-28-2007, 07:04 AM
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Seriously ??? Got anything a bit less radical ?? I have been with the guy for almost 5 years now. I'd kinda like to keep him !
__________________
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. Thug means never having to say you're sorry.
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#4
09-28-2007, 07:10 AM
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My wife and I live 10-15 minutes from both of our families and have had not ONE surprise visit. Even when I hadn't had my family over for almost six months my grandma simply commented that she'd love to see the house so we invited her over. Both families are very respectful and that's what it comes down to, it's a matter of respect. Put your foot down.
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Last edited by Despare; 09-28-2007 at 07:17 AM.
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#5
09-28-2007, 07:11 AM
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5 years?
That's impressive:) Ditch the boyfriend...JK! I would say just ignore the in-laws weirdness, they never get any better. So, the only thing you can control and change is how YOU deal with it. In my case, I just toughened up and stopped caring what they said or how they acted....It took about 7 years but now I am the most pleasant person in the world when I have to co-exsist around them:D
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#6
09-28-2007, 07:14 AM
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Oh and when they 'drop in', just say "I'm sorry I wasn't expecting you, I have plans, can you call the next so I can be ready for company?"
Do that a coupla of times and they will get the hint-you have to train people...like dogs.
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#7
09-28-2007, 07:24 AM
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@ despare : lucky bastard ! :p to these people, it's nothing at all. it's completely normal, if they're around, to stop by. or come if they so feel like it. they have no boundaries whatsoever. his brother now calls before coming by, but only to TELL us that he's coming (not ask), and if we happen to not answer our phones, he comes by anyway !
@novak : yeah, i'm actually impressed myself. had i known about the family earlier, i probably would have ditched him! I am trying to get better at handling it. The boyfriend gets deprived of sex when it happens.. but I feel like it's out of his hands as well.
__________________
Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. Thug means never having to say you're sorry.
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#8
09-28-2007, 07:29 AM
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Just one time when they come over let them hear you yell, "pretend we're not home". Then proceed to close the drapes, turn off the lights real quick, and make sure your cars are in plain view heh.
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#9
09-28-2007, 08:04 AM
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My in laws are wonderful people, and very easy to get along with (and I am not just saying that because my husband might read this ;) ). They live about ten minutes from us, and have yet to drop in unannounced. They stop by sometimes to drop stuff off for us, but they leave it on the porch. If they want to see us, or vice versa, we make plans a few days in advance.
Now my parents, I almost feel sorry for my husband.....because they are completely insane.....hahaha....:D But they live in Georgia. I had an ex-boyfriend whose mother was a freakin' nghtmare, but in this case, Nova is right, the apple didn't fall far from the tree. I spent a couple of years in hell dealing with her shit, and his......and I couldn't tell you which one was worse. But you just have to let him know very clearly that it is unacceptable for them to drop in unexpectedly. Really, its going to be up to him to stand up to them (though you both can, the brunt of it will be on him), which is never easy when its your family. There is always hurt feelings. But there's really nothing you can do except make it clear what your feelings are on the subject, and just deal with it until there is a change.
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