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  #1  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:27 AM
allmykids's Avatar
allmykids allmykids is offline
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what do you think.................

I'm not much of a writer but Here goes................

I want to laugh
I want to cry

I want to know the Reason why

I want to live
I want to die

I can't win I don't know Why

I want to Quit
I want to fight

I just can't figure out what's right

When I wake It starts again
Someone save me from my sin



So what do you guys think???
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  #2  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:41 AM
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filmmaker2 filmmaker2 is offline
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I think it's very expressive and concise. I like it!~
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  #3  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:44 AM
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slasherman slasherman is offline
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im writing a rock text these days......here are some of it...


My friend got a bigger dick
he fucked my girl
and it made me sick..
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  #4  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:56 AM
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allmykids allmykids is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by filmmaker2
I think it's very expressive and concise. I like it!~
Thank you!! It Just came to me when I was depressed. :)
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  #5  
Old 08-14-2005, 12:43 PM
MoonLit Meadow MoonLit Meadow is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by allmykids
Thank you!! It Just came to me when I was depressed. :)
I'm gonna echo what filmmaker said...definately to the point! :) It's not always necessary to find the hidden meaning in poetry...sometimes it's better to just lay it all out there..which is what you did :)
Good effort AMK. It's always good to vent. Sometimes writing down your feelings can help you deal with them better than just letting them stay bottled up inside. :)
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  #6  
Old 08-14-2005, 10:39 PM
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Deposable Deposable is offline
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:eek:
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  #7  
Old 08-14-2005, 10:42 PM
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RavageRitual RavageRitual is offline
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I liked it too, I could never right something like that. Good Job
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Hang the body in the shed
Using meat-hooks through the legs
Catch the blood as it drips from the stump
Like the others from the past
The naked belly, full of cysts
Smells so good, I cant resist
I know inside this ones the best
As I eat the rotting chest
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  #8  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:02 PM
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allmykids allmykids is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by RavageRitual
I liked it too, I could never right something like that. Good Job
I can't write either but that just came to me. Weird huh!! Oh and thanks!! :D
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  #9  
Old 08-14-2005, 11:06 PM
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DraculaInDallas DraculaInDallas is offline
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Good stuff AMK :)
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  #10  
Old 08-15-2005, 11:40 AM
TheLivingDead
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You wont an honest opinion stick with your day job. It wasnt all that good.
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