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#1
05-25-2005, 07:06 PM
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Shitty Critiques
I wanna know why some critiques out there are so stupid when it comes to movies. Especially quotes on the back of movies. I was looking at the dvd case of "alone in the dark" for a laugh and on the back it has quotes. they were something to the effect of "Slaters greatest preformance" "Scarey as hell", like what the fudge!? Are they retarded or something? on the "BoogyMan" case it says "The scariest movie EVER!" I mean honestly, are they drunk or something. Anyone name anymore bull shit quotes?
__________________
IM DIRECTING THIS F*CKING MOO-VAY! As I was going up the stairs, I met a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today, I wish I wish he'd go away . Last edited by IDrinkYourBlood; 05-25-2005 at 07:08 PM. 
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#2
05-25-2005, 07:08 PM
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It's like when TV spots for movies like "Ice Princess" say things like...
The summer's BEST family film! or.. The most fun you'll have in the theatre all year!
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MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#3
05-25-2005, 07:15 PM
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scariest movie ever" is on like 3847982323469258 movie boxes
__________________
I feel like a balloon floating higher I’m touching a distant moon I don’t think I’ll come down anytime soon Ah my kitten I am so glad you’re the way you are You’re my favorite living human by far ’cause you make this frightening world less bizarre
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#4
05-25-2005, 08:38 PM
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It's a tough market out there, I guess. I like the quotes where they dig up some guy from Backroads, Iowa or a radio D.J. that most of the world hasn't heard of. Thats usually an indication that the movie is a stinker. Also, they have a tendency to show the most lurid stills from a movie, sometimes misrepresenting the movie entirely. I avoided an Austrailian movie titled, Next of Kin, because of a few photos that showed a blood-soaked guy's face. Finally I rented it because I nearly exhausted the horror section and it turned out to be about two minutes of the film. The rest of the movie was great, creepy and beautifully shot. Gore-free. It's those little surprises that keep most horror fans going.
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#5
05-25-2005, 08:46 PM
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Quote:
You are now my enemy. :mad:
__________________
MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#6
05-25-2005, 09:36 PM
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Quote:
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#7
05-25-2005, 09:38 PM
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Quote:
There's times I hate the folks round these here parts too.
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MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#8
05-25-2005, 09:44 PM
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Quote:
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#9
05-25-2005, 10:06 PM
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Re: Shitty Critiques
Quote:
i'm convinced they(the producers)just make the shit up,or at the very least take it out of context.
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how 'bout a nice greasy pork sandwich served inna dirty ashtray? Budduskey:i am the motherfucking shore patrol,motherfucker!i am the motherfucking shore patrol!give this man a beer. "Repent, Harlequin!" said the Ticktockman. "Get stuffed!" replied the Harlequin, sneering.
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#10
05-25-2005, 10:16 PM
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Re: Re: Shitty Critiques
Quote:
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