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#11
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For soem reason, a ton of people keep calling my school classroom asking for a sub from subway. Now only if I were to answer the phone, I'd have a ton of fun. And usually at my house, we got caslls for Doctor's appointments. One time I answered it and set up a meeting in the middle of the nite, like around 2:30 a.m. But my parents don't know about that. I also love to fuckin' freak out telemarketers. It's so f'n fun.:p
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#12
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I got a phone call left on my Awnsering machine. I didnt know how to leave a message thing so it just beeps. So I came home from work and saw the light flashing on the machine right, so i put my keys in my pocket and hit the "play" button. the message was this.
Sobbing girl, sounded around mid-twenties. "Mom, John had found out today that he has AIDs. My appointment is tomorrow and Im pretty sure that I have it too." Starts to cry and hangs up. I was left sitting there going "O....................K" and then I made hambugars.
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IM DIRECTING THIS F*CKING MOO-VAY! As I was going up the stairs, I met a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today, I wish I wish he'd go away . |
#13
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#14
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I get all kinds of wierdos calling my place. Several different people have called for "Laura" and one got very hostile when I tried to tell him that there wasn't anyone there by that name, said he knew she was there and he was coming over to get her, etc. etc. I get a lot of hang-ups calls, too. Makes me wonder who lived here before me.
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#15
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I'm suprised that with so many cell phones we don't get more wrong messages than we actually get.
Who ever had my current house phone number has the last name of Gurrerro, their kid skips school, they don't pay their bills--or give anyone their current phone#. When I lived in the country my phone# was the same--except for the area code--as an oil drilling operation. Death messages, wife left, etc. Several times I felt like I needed to call their number and relay the message.
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I awake--in my new coffin of native earth. |
#16
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#17
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well, my old house keeper used to do hilarious ones.
poepl called her and tried to sell her stuff, and she gave 'em shit about it, and it was hilarious! examples: 1. Seller: Hello would you like to subscribe to our magazine? House Keeper: Im Blind!!! Seller: oh my god I am so sorry *Hangs up* 2. Seller: Hello, your mother needs to renew her subscription to her Martha Stewart Magazine in order to keep getting them. House Keeper: She...She....passed away last week!!! *Fake sobs* Seller: Im sorry to hear that.....would you like to continue the subscription on your own account? House Keeper: *Click!* |
#18
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Another one I've used on telephone solicitors who ask for my wife--That Bitch! she was arrested for prostitution last night.
Of course my favorite to use on telephone solicitors after I've repeatedly said NO is--Which letter confuses you--the N or the O. They hang up at this point.
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I awake--in my new coffin of native earth. |
#19
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#20
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:D
__________________
... ![]() If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit My Karma ran over my Dogma God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him I'm suffocating in what's become of me... The rancid remains of what I used to be |
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