The Tale of HDC Manor

[The Flayed One]

I'll be a drunken ex archaeologist who has lost his passion for the job.

[ferretchucker]

This should be enough...I may have to draft in a few of the non volunteers, just to bring the numbers up. It's never too late to ask to be in it though!

[Elvis_Christ]

I'll be in dude :D

[bwind22]

Ferret, you can always use me in your scripts. Permanent permission granted. Make me the good guy, bad guy, cannon fodder, whatever... I don't care. You can use me as a character in any of your stories however you see fit.

[ferretchucker]

Originally Posted by bwind22

Ferret, you can always use me in your scripts. Permanent permission granted. Make me the good guy, bad guy, cannon fodder, whatever... I don't care. You can use me as a character in any of your stories however you see fit.

And that's why you're my favourite! :p

[Horror4ever]

The inspector with a very suspicious character or kinda weirdo.:)

[Zero]

i believe my contract obligates you to put me in every HDC film - forever!!!!!!

[_____V_____]

Originally Posted by Zero

i believe my contract obligates you to put me in every HDC film - forever!!!!!!

As long as we get to blast your red furry butt with rock salt in the end.

[newb]

You've read my contract

I have to be the hero

at least one nude scene with one of HDC hottest chicks

If you must kill me the odds have to be something like 10 bad guys against me

and NO red M&Ms in my trailer

[ferretchucker]

Opening credits roll. Fade to a shot of a long, winding road going through a forest. Rain is pouring down as a lone man runs through it. Thunder roars and a lightning flash illuminates the forest around him. The man himself is wearing a relatively tatty looking brown suit complete with a pork pie hat. His hair is dark and he looks to be in his early forties, however his face is aged with signs of stress and worry. He quickly checks his pocket watch. 7:05. This man is V.

V: Oh damn!

With a flash of lightning, the shot changes to the outside of a large manor house set on top of a hill. It has a tall standing perimeter fence with large iron gates. The letters "H.D.C" are written in large metal letters on the gate. Despite the house's large size an initial impressive appearance, it is showing signs of age. Bricks are crumbling and the garden is growing unkempt. Lights are on inside. V rushes up to the gate where a man wearing a large coat awaits him. He is quite old and very gaunt, like a skeleton. He beckons V closer. This man is Ferretchucker.

He shouts through the rain.

Ferretchucker: Come, come! You are near a quarter of an hour late, sir! May I beg you, tell me your name?

V: V, my name is V. I trust I haven't held up the festivities too much?

Ferretchucker: Not a great deal, no, but the master should be glad to begin. Follow, I shall find you some dry clothes, sir. You cannot present yourself dressed in that soaking apparel!

V: Lead on!

Cut to the hallway of the manor. The walls are varnished wood. Buzzing light bulbs protrude from the wall on copper arms. An impressive staircase stands before the large oak doors. The floor is a black and white tile. Up on the wall is an oil painting of a relatively old looking man looking proud and valiant. He is dressed in armour save for his face. The doors open, V and Ferretchucker spill in. Ferretchucker removes his coat, showing a smart suit. V removes his hat and runs a hand through his short, greying hair.

Ferretchucker: This way, sir.

He beckons V to follow as he walks slowly up the stairs. They continue through a long corridor until they reach the door at the very end.

Ferretchucker: Your clothes are inside...waiting.

V: How did you know I'd need them?

Ferretchucker: See you at dinner. I believe you know where the parlour is. Be there in 5 minutes, ready for the master's arrival.

The scene cuts to a smart looking parlour where people are gathered. Some sit on lounge chairs, two men play billiards whilst a few others watch and some merely stand holding their wine and conversing. One of the men playing billiards accidentally scuffs the table. He has a thick moustache and gold rimmed glasses. He is roughly 60. This is Bwind.

Bwind: Blast!

His opponent, a younger man with slicked back black hair chuckles. This is Return.

Return: Ha! Accept it, old man, you've lost touch since we last met.

Bwind: I shall say no such thing, not now nor ever! You know very well who your superior is, boy!

A younger woman standing by the table pipes up. She is wearing a long red dress and is smoking a cigarette.

Chronogrl: Father, must you embarrass yourself further? Just accept defeat and save what is left of your dignity.

A man nearby rushes over. He speaks as quickly as he talks and appears to live with his eyebrows raised in astonishment.

Amicus: Captain Bwind could never admit defeat with dignity for surely the two ideas juxtapose each other, no? Perhaps he could maintain dignity if he is forced to end the game against his will but then his pride would be damaged by the circumstance in which he must leave. No...no, the captain would most likely accept his situation with valour and even gain glory when he has escaped said situation. Even so...

He drifts off with a glazed over expression in his eye. All three others are looking at him with perplexed gazes.

Return: What an odd young fellow.

Bwind: What is your name, young man, and how do you know so much about me?

Amicus: Amicus, Amicus Horror. I'm a long time admirer of your work in the Afghan, captain!

Chronogrl puts a face in her hands whilst Bwind suddenly puffs up his chest looking very smug.

Chronogrl: Don't get him started, please don't!

Bwind: Whilst my daughter here may not show me the respect I deserve, I'm glad somebody does.

Return: Steady, one moment! Have I not shown you perpetual respect for all of your valiant achievements? Do I not remind you often of my admiration for your bravery?

Bwind: That may be the case, but he does it without mocking my ability at Billia-

They are cut off by some loud laughter from the corner where an old gentleman of around the same age as Bwind is standing with three young women surrounding him. He beams at all of them as they continue to chuckle. The man glances across and sees the annoyed faces of the others. He winks up at them an continues to flirt with the girls.

Opposite them sit several others in large arm chairs. One of them is speaking quickly with clear enthusiasm for the subject. He takes a sip of his drink then continues speaking. This is Flayed, and the others are Zero and Elvis. Zero looks thoroughly bored but Elvis nods politely as Flayed continues to speak.

Flayed: ...and so they say that across in Egypt, these tombs are just being discovered left, right and centre! My old friend Lord Carnarvon is growing very interested.

Elvis: Sounds incredible. I bet you're finding all sorts of things here in England too, though.

Flayed: You would think so...

Before he can continue, one of the men sitting nearby (alone) quickly stands, momentarily checking Flayed. The man walks briskly towards the door where V has just entered. The man is a few years older than V but beams as he walks towards him, smoking from his pipe. This man is Roshiq.

Roshiq: V! Thank the heavens you are here! I was beginning to fear I would have to spend all weekend with these insufferable buffoons.

V: Who are they? And for that matter, why are we here?

Roshiq: Various aristocratic fools, friends of the Lord I would imagine. As for why we're here, I've yet to find out. I assume you were sent the same letter as everybody else.

V: If that letter essentially just told you to be here today at 7:00, then yes. Details were scarce.

Roshiq: Well, the Lord hasn't ever been one to put effort in for no reason, has he?

V: Honestly, the only two people in the room with a brain and yet we can't do our job and detect what's going on! Ironic, eh?

Roshiq: You just speak for yourself, V. Don't forget, you learned from the best, but you didn't learn it all!

V cocks a smile, just as Ferretchucker walks in and opens the door, ringing a small bell.

Ferretchucker: Follow me to the Dining Room, please...

All the people in the room cease what they're doing and follow. Some of them exchange a few words about the butler's dull demeanour. They walk in to the grand dining room. There is a long table running the length of the room and sitting at the end is a man slightly older than Bwind and Newb, smiling up at them. This is Doc Faustus.

Doc Faustus: Good evening, friends. Welcome to what I can assure you, will be a good night.

Ending credits roll.