Cowboys vs. Dinosaurs
Godammit why do I keep doing this to myself. The characters are stupid, the story is stupid, the CGI and acting is AWFUL. Theropods eat the townspeople and they try to mix in dramatic build up. That's not the time for build up, that shit belongs in the beginning of your shitty movie, not the end where it's time for the finale of fight scenes!
The gore in here is just about the worst. People fall down like an idiot before the bad CGI monsters can even touch them and blood splatters like a balloon being popped! Or like they just said 'fuck it' and used a photoshop brush. Either way it looks about as real as Dolly Parton's boobs!
The main character, whose name of COURSE is Walker, was injured from bull riding, and yet the build up is getting back on a horse. Well yeah a bull's going to buck you off moron! A horse is a whole other story! I couldn't even try to give two fucks when they had the dramatic slow motion play for him as he got in the saddle again.
There was something else that happened after his injuries that had him abusing his girlfriend or something before he left for three years. They NEVER go into detail about it, and yet for some reason the movie tries to show the sheriff as the villain in this!
Also none of the people in this are cowboys. So the title is a lie. Putting someone on a horse doesn't make them a cowboy. If anything it's; One kind-of-but-not-really-cowboy, two chicks and a black guy who CERTAINLY doesn't die.
This movie was just terrible, stupid, painful and not nearly short enough! In the mood for a dinosaur movie but already saw Jurassic Park a couple thousand times? WATCH IT ANOTHER THOUSAND TIMES. It's better than this!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron Von Marlon
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Thanks much, man! 8)