View Full Version : The Horror.com pron movie :)
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 06:08 AM
Okay, I liked the what is your porn name thread, so i figured we could do the plot of a porno starring our porn names....
I suggest "Plight of the Protruder", a touching tale of a pilot with a huge member, trapped in Vietnam after his plane gets shot down. It stars lots of asian extras, and Cleft Pounder. Lets pretend that my alter-ego Cleft is as "gifted" as Ron Jeremy (a fat, hairy hedgehog with a giant weiner), but a little harier.
It starts when he gets shot down by a Russian Pilot in a dominatrix out fit. She flashes her boobs to distract him, and then shoots him from behind. He makes an off color remark about taking it in the ass and "goes down"
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 06:20 AM
Online speak for porn.
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 06:24 AM
It developed out of people mispelling "porn", just like when people put "teh" instead of "the". thsi sis alos how "owned" became "pwned".
In this case, i MEANT to say porn, but i mispelled it....
Anyway, so he crashes, and Cleft is surrounded by many women, most of them "enhanced"... Anyone care to continue?
Originally posted by Vodstok
It developed out of people mispelling "porn", just like when people put "teh" instead of "the". thsi sis alos how "owned" became "pwned".
In this case, i MEANT to say porn, but i mispelled it....
Anyway, so he crashes, and Cleft is surrounded by many women, most of them "enhanced"... Anyone care to continue?
OH....you mean dyslexia.
natas
07-14-2004, 06:45 AM
Cleft's crash was brutal. Buffy saw the whole thing and ran to his aid. She knelt next to him..her chest rising and falling with her deep breaths. "Are you ok?" she asked, as she cradled is head in her lap stroking his hair. Cleft looked up and found himself gazing into the bluest eyes he'd ever seen. "I think my leg is broken."
"Don't worry," Buffy said. "We'll take care of you. My friends and I just live over there. You can stay with us and we'll nuse you back to health."
natas
07-14-2004, 06:47 AM
This was a great idea!! This will give me something to look forward to every night....just one thing...nobody kill off my character!!
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 07:01 AM
She contacted her companions to assist with carrying Cleft to her place. On the way there, Cleft passed out from the pain, and they feared that there may be some internal bleeding. Once they got him there, she told the others to leave the room. Then, she decided it would be best to strip him down to look for any bruising that would indicate the source of the internal bleeding. What she found was not a bruise, but the biggest dick she had ever seen before. Along with the fact that he had amazing regenerative powers, so his leg and the bleeding had healed already.
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 07:02 AM
Dont worry, there is no killing in porn, just a lot of "Stabbing" :)
Cleft looked down and said "My god, my third leg is engorged with blood."
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 07:10 AM
The infamous Doctor Proctor, aka "Proctor The Butt Doctor" looked at his member and just about fainted. He had never seen anything so large before, though his came pretty close. He was an assman, so he didn't need the biggest one in the world. Might be a little hard to get it in her bum that way.
He grabbed Buffy from behind and held onto her tightly. He was jealous of this "Cleft Pounder", and didn't want her going near him.
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 07:21 AM
Cleft pounder is patched up, and goes for a short walk into the jungle. A snake mistakes the monster peeking out of his shorts as a rival python, and strikes at him.
Cleft falls, sweating profusely (like Ron Jeremy, he ALWAYS sweats). He calls out "I may have been bitten by a snake! On my third leg, could someone, oh could someone come suck out the poison!
Dr Proctor ignores his pleas. (not quite ready to explore that territory here....)
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 07:43 AM
Nor am I....
Having no other choice, Dr. Proctor runs and grabs Buffy so that she may suck out the poison.
(Just how in-depth are we going to get with this thing here? We're approaching a point where this could get very vulgar, very quickly.)
natas
07-14-2004, 07:46 AM
Buffy was glad to be in Proctor's arms, the size of Cleft's member scared her yet intrigued her. Proctor held her tight. She realized she was rubbing herself against him. The sexual energy in the room was making her hot....not to mention Proctor, who at this time was kissing Buffy's neck. His hands roaming her body with great precision. Knowing all the right places to go.
Buffy turned around and pushed Proctor onto a nearby sofa. She knealed on the floor in front of him and slowly took him into her mouth. She taunted and teased his member til he exploded.
Cleft was watching the whole time but couldn't watch any longer. He had to have her. He got up and went to her. As he started kissing her he started tearing at her clothes. He pushed her backwards onto a bed. Buffy got a glimps of his shear size again. He saw the fear in her eyes. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle," he said as he pinned her down.
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 07:48 AM
I think I just had an accident... christ...
hellfire1
07-14-2004, 07:48 AM
LMAO !!!!
down, boy !! :p
natas
07-14-2004, 07:49 AM
Ah..crap!! Took too long with that one....now it doesn't fit into the story. Oh well...hope you like it anyway.
By the look of my post I would have to say..yes to the vulgar real fast thing.
Sorry...I'm really getting into this!!
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 07:49 AM
I think keeping it to euphamisms is about as raunchy as i am comfortable with. it's supposed to be funny, not really all that exciting...
"Buffy" is pretty dirty... :)
He lubed her up with some handy ky to avoid making any "Squeeking" sounds....
natas
07-14-2004, 07:56 AM
Originally posted by Egekrusher
I think I just had an accident... christ...
I take that as a compliment!!:D
Egekrusher
07-14-2004, 08:00 AM
I have to take a break from this thread ladies and gents. I'm at work, and I'm just too excitable for my own good right now.
natas
07-14-2004, 08:10 AM
Awwwww! :(
I gotta get to bed anyways...got to get up early. But I will definatly be having some good dreams tonight!!;)
Kay people....give me some good stuff to work with tomorrow!!
Vod.....I think you bit off more than you can chew with this thread. [ no pun intended ]
ShankS
07-14-2004, 08:37 AM
lol this thread.
zwoti
07-14-2004, 08:38 AM
Originally posted by ShankS
lol this thread.
how did i know you'd enjoy this thread..
ShankS
07-14-2004, 08:39 AM
it was meant to be a sarcastic 'lol'
:D
Vodstok
07-14-2004, 08:40 AM
YeaH, I know :)
thjat is why i started this one:
Horror.com prawn movie (http://horror.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8031)
I can see this one gets people's creativity working overtime....
fluffho
07-14-2004, 09:33 AM
Originally posted by Vodstok
[B] It stars lots of asian extras[B]
<~asian
:D
natas
07-15-2004, 07:24 AM
Originally posted by Vodstok
YeaH, I know :)
thjat is why i started this one:
Horror.com prawn movie (http://horror.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8031)
I can see this one gets people's creativity working overtime....
Sorry....you started the thread...I gave my posts. Didn't know it was suppose to be tame porn....
Vodstok
07-15-2004, 07:44 AM
I never specified, be as raunchy as you want :)
Although, if you are interested in crustaceans, we have a thread for that too. :)
I know, i'm a dork.
ShankS
07-15-2004, 10:43 AM
hahaha :D