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  #71  
Old 03-08-2006, 06:29 PM
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stubbornforgey stubbornforgey is offline
my opinion counts dammit
 
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yups..like duh me !!
the jokes are great :D
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  #72  
Old 03-09-2006, 12:07 PM
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This is what happens when you're only allowed ONE drink at the company picnic.













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  #73  
Old 03-10-2006, 04:00 AM
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scouse mac scouse mac is offline
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Proof, if proof were needed, that Canadians DO have a sense of humour.



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  #74  
Old 03-10-2006, 06:58 AM
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The Flayed One The Flayed One is offline
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Well, it's Friday again, and that means drunken goodness. Tonights medicine:


Lowenbrau
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  #75  
Old 03-10-2006, 08:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by The Flayed One
Well, it's Friday again, and that means drunken goodness. Tonights medicine:


Lowenbrau
If you like your beers on the malty side....may i suggest a Sam Adams Double Bock. Very smooth and it packs quite a wallop....8.8 abv.

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  #76  
Old 03-10-2006, 08:56 PM
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LETTER TO REDNECK SON




Dearest Son,

I'm writing this slow because I know you can't read fast.

We don't live where we did when you left home.
Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within
20 miles of your home, so we moved
This place is really nice.
It even has a washing machine.
I'm not sure about it.
I put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain.
We haven't seen them since.

The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the
first time for three days
and the second time for four days.

Auntie Maude has sent you a pair of socks she knit,
she put a third one in because she heard you have grown
another foot since she last saw you.

Jimmy locked his keys in the car yesterday.
We were really worried because it took him two hours
to get me and your father out.

Your sister had a baby this morning, but I haven't found out what
it is yet, so I don't know
if you are an aunt or uncle. The baby looks just like your
brother.

Uncle Bobby fell into a whiskey vat last week.
Some men tried to pull him out but he fought them off and
drowned. We had him
cremated, he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pickup truck.
Butch was driving. He rolled down the window and swam to
safety.Your other two
friends were in the back.
They drowned because they couldn't get the tailgate down.

There isn't much more news at this time.
Nothing much out of the normal has happened.

Your Favorite Aunt,
Mom.
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  #77  
Old 03-10-2006, 08:56 PM
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A Beer Before It Starts

A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the
TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."

She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer. When he finished
it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start." This
time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer.

When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts."

"That's it!" She blows her top, "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop
your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run
around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and
wash and iron all day long?

The husband sighed. "Shit, it's started."
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  #78  
Old 03-15-2006, 02:10 PM
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Interesting Psychological Fact...

A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that
the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending
on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example, If she is
ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features.
However, if she is menstruating, or menopausal, she tends to prefer a
man with scissors lodged in his temple and a bat jammed up his ass while
he is on fire.


Further studies in this area have been canceled.
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  #79  
Old 03-15-2006, 02:15 PM
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Elvis_Christ Elvis_Christ is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by newb
she tends to prefer a
man with scissors lodged in his temple and a bat jammed up his ass while
he is on fire.
Sounds like my ex girlfriend :D I usually hid in a bunker during the PMS fury
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  #80  
Old 03-15-2006, 03:15 PM
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stubbornforgey stubbornforgey is offline
my opinion counts dammit
 
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hahahahahaha..letter to redneck son
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