The "NO DRAMA" thread

[newb]

Originally Posted by The Flayed One

This feels like the good old days again. Sitting in my office with not a lot to do, posting back & forth with newb, urge & the rest of the gang. It's good to be home:)

We still have to get a few back fulltime [ Bloodrayne, Shanks, zero, and it would be nice if zwoti posted a bit more :D ]

[fortunato]

Originally Posted by _____V_____

Phone call from Daddy:

((((RING))))

**Pick Up**

"Hello?"

"Hi honey, this is Daddy, Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No Daddy, She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank"

After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Frank"

"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now"

Brief Pause

"Uh, okay then, ...this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door, and shout to Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway"

"Okay Daddy, just a minute"

A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone "I did it Daddy!"

"And what happened honey?" he asked

"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!"

"Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Frank?"

"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it, he hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead"

***Long Pause***

***Longer Pause***

Then Daddy says . . ..

"Swimming pool??
...Is this 555-7039??????"

"No."

Click............

hahaha

that's the best one i've heard in a while.

-----------------

Why do ducks have webbed feet?
To stamp out fires.
Why do elephants have flat feet?
To stamp out burning ducks.

[fortunato]

Originally Posted by newb

We still have to get a few back fulltime [ Bloodrayne, Shanks, zero, and it would be nice if zwoti posted a bit more :D ]

it is incredibly exciting to have so many longtime regulars back.
when i signed up, i pretty much became one of those noobs that makes the intro post, and a few more, then forgets about the account after a while.
when i first came back regularly last summer, this place was mostly dead.
it's so great to see it bustling and thriving again, thanks to the tireless efforts of _v_, the wonderful regulars, the wonderful returning regulars, and a few great new members.

[hammerfan]

If College Students Wrote the Bible

The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning cold
The Ten Commandments would actually be only five - double-spaced and written in a large font
A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit re-selling
Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria food
Paul's letter to the Romans would become Paul's email to [email protected]
Reason Cain killed Abel: they were roommates
Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: they didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen
Instead of God creating the world in six days resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before he had to get it done

[alkytrio666]

Originally Posted by hammerfan

If College Students Wrote the Bible

The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning cold
The Ten Commandments would actually be only five - double-spaced and written in a large font
A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit re-selling
Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn't cafeteria food
Paul's letter to the Romans would become Paul's email to [email protected]
Reason Cain killed Abel: they were roommates
Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: they didn't want to ask directions and look like freshmen
Instead of God creating the world in six days resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before he had to get it done

Hahaha, funny stuff!

[hammerfan]

Originally Posted by alkytrio666

Hahaha, funny stuff!

Thank you! :D I got it from my church newsletter.

[urgeok2]

this made me laugh ..


although i like cats - here's an excellent argument against them :

http://ca.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuse...deoID=43507539

[_____V_____]

[_____V_____]

[newb]

Originally Posted by _____V_____

that reminds me