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#31
04-04-2005, 06:52 PM
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Quote:
__________________
DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A SHIT !!! LIFES A BITCH THEN YOU DIE!! 
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#32
04-04-2005, 11:48 PM
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If you don't come back.... we know where too find you
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#33
04-05-2005, 12:18 PM
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Quote:
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#34
04-05-2005, 12:31 PM
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Re: Today is the day!!
Quote:
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#35
04-05-2005, 01:14 PM
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thats so cool. i wanna met some of the poepl from this forum in person too!
does anyone live in or is anywhere near Southern Illinois?
__________________
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#36
04-05-2005, 01:15 PM
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Quote:
__________________
MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#37
04-05-2005, 01:17 PM
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Re: Today is the day!!
Quote:
whats the first thing that goes through your head just before you die in an airplane crash?? The front seat!!!:D :D :p :p
__________________
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#38
04-05-2005, 01:26 PM
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A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom,
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax - OH MY GOD!" Silence. Then, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking, the flight-attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach said, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"
__________________
MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#39
04-05-2005, 01:47 PM
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In honor of your flight I'm going to list some of the top things you don't want to hear over the P.A. system.;)
1. Ocean crossing flight: This is your Captain speaking, I just wanted to take this time to remind you that your seat cushions can be used as floatation devices. 2. Hey folks, we're going to play a little game of geography trivia. If you can recognize where we are, tell your flight attendant and receive an extra pack of peanuts. 3. Our loss of altitude allows a unique close up perspective of the local terrain. I assure you that it's all part of our airline's new commitment to make your a flight a sight seeing extravaganza. 4. Goose! Bogey at 2 o'clock....one on our tail!!!! Eject!!!! Eject!!!!!!! 5. Ummmmmm....Sorry......(silence) 6. (As the plane turns around right after takeoff)....uhhhhh....we have to go back ....we ..we ....uhhhhhh ....forgot something..... 7. I'm sure everyone noticed the loss of an engine, however the reduction in weight and drag will mean we'll be flying much more efficiently now. 8. Fasten your seat belt. (same tone your friend with the suicidal driving tendencies uses when you get in the car). 9. This is your Captain speaking....these stupid planes are a lot different than the ships I'm used to.. so you'll have to give me some leeway... 10. It would be a good idea if right now everyone closed their shades and watched the in-flight movie. 11. We've now reached our cruising altitude of 20,000 feet and ... Oh noooooooo!!!!!.. 12. Don't worry! That one is always on E... 13. Get the parachutes ready... 14. Drinks are on me... 15. I'll have what the Captain's having... 16. Hey capt'n take another hit man...
__________________
As I was going up the stair, I met a man who wasn't there, he wasn't there again today, I wish, I wish, he'd go away.
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