OMG...This Is SO True!!!

[bloodrayne]

Originally Posted by Roderick Usher

Nope, not that In-n-out

This is the best burger chain in the world. It's older than McD's but they don't have freezers for anything for but the ice that goes in the soda. Everything else is fresh.

Fresh potatoes are sliced in front of you for fries. Milkshakes are made from real milk & real ice cream. They only do burgers, fries & shakes.

Fan-fucking-tastic!

OH...We USED to have a place like that a long time ago...It was called GD Ritzy's...It was very expensive...It was only here for about a year...

[Posher778]

We have about 3476591237659269356123890658072358369587 starbucks...

[_____V_____]

You Know You're From California When...


The fastest part of your commute is down your driveway.

You were born somewhere else.

You know how to eat an artichoke.

The primary bugs that you worry about are electronic.

Your car has bullet-proof windows.

Left is right and right is wrong.

Your monthly house payments exceed your annual income.

You can't find your other earring because your son is wearing it.

You drive to your neighborhood block party.

Your family tree contains "significant others."

You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

You don't exterminate your roaches, you smoke them.

You see 25 lawyers chasing an ambulance.

More than clothes come out of the closets.

You go to a tanning salon before going to the beach.

More money is spent on facelifts than on diapers.

Smoking in your office is not optional.

You pack shorts and a T-shirt for skiing in the snow, and a sweater and a wetsuit for the beach.

When you can't schedule a meeting because you must "do lunch."

Your children learn to walk in Birkenstocks.

Rainstorms or thunder are the lead story for the local news.

You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

You'll reluctantly miss yoga class to wait for the hot tub repairman.

You consult your horoscope before planning your day.

A glass has been reserved for you at your favorite winery.

All highways into the state say: "no fruits."

All highways out of the state say: "Go back."

The Terminator is your governor

It's barely sprinkling rain and there's a report on every news station: "STORM WATCH"!!

Your coworker has 8 body piercings and none are visible.

You make over $300,000 and still can't afford a house.

You take a bus and are shocked at two people carrying on a conversation in English.

You can't remember . . . is pot illegal?

Your child's 3rd-grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Flower.

You've been to a baby shower that has two mothers and a sperm donor.

You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian.

A really great parking space can totally move you to tears.

Gas costs $1.00 per gallon more than anywhere else in the U.S.

Unlike back home, the guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney really IS George Clooney.

Your car insurance costs as much as your house payment.

You pass an elementary school playground and the children are all busy with their cell phones and iPods.

Its barely sprinkling rain outside, so you leave for work an hour early to avoid all the weather-related accidents.

Both you AND your dog have therapists, psychics, personal trainers and cosmetic surgeons.

If you drive illegally, they take your driver's license. If you're here illegally, they want to give you one.

Finally...HEYY!!. . . is pot illegal?

[friday13thfan]

you know your from Lancaster county, PA when

Your idea of Chicken Pot Pie has nothing to do with a pie and you can't figure out why people might think it would.

Your driving lessons involved learning to avoid horse droppings.

You know at least 5 euphemisms for animal manure and at least 4 of them involve food.

You know how to cook, but not without butter.

You've ever missed school for the first day of deer season... but didn't get in trouble.

The following words mean something to you: Fire Hall Wedding, Chicken and Waffle Dinner, Fire-police, Wooly Bear Whoopie Pie

You spend at least 30 minutes every summer day complaining about New Jersey drivers.

You don't understand why people would ever want to see the Amish.

The local Post Office used to be a single-family home and they close between noon and 1 for lunch.

You have ever ended a sentence with "a while".

You do not giggle when you see the following signs: Lititz, Intercourse, Blue Ball, Bird-in-Hand

You've heard of 7-11 but you've never seen one.

You cannot buy beer and wine from the same store.

Park City has nothing to do with skiing for you.

Agnes 1972 means something to you and you can tell stories about it.

You pronounce Lancaster in "Burt Lancaster" differently from Lancaster in "Lancaster, PA".

You personally know many people with the name: Lapp Lantz Stoltzfus (or Stoltzfoos) Zimmerman Zook

Iced Tea for you is sweeter than Pepsi.

You know someone who repairs gasoline-powered lawn mowers, but is forbidden to own one.

You think Fasnacht Day and Groundhog day are national holidays.

You know that eggs are either white or brown... and you have a preference.

You think the Mississippi is just a tad wider than the Susquehanna.

You know who James Buchanan was.

You can pronounce "Ephrata."

You don't have to be told what Shoo Fly Pie is.

You go to the store when the milk is "all".

You think orange traffic cones are the natural foliage surrounding Route 30.

You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word, "snow."

You know the only way to make good fastnachts is to cook them in LARD.

You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, candy or ice cream or that packages turkeys, beans or bologna.

You do things "once," as in, "I'll go check in the back room once."

You can stop along the road to buy fruit, vegetables or crafts on the "honor system."

YOUR turkey has "filling," not "stuffing" and most certainly NOT "dressing."

You know that chicken corn soup from a firehouse is the most perfect food on earth.

You say things like, "Outen the lights," "I'm calling off today" and "They're calling for snow."

You've heard of distelfinks and hex signs.

Red Beet Eggs makes your list of top ten favorite foods.

You pronounce "Suite" as SUIT, not SWEET.

You say you're going out to the shed "AWHILE," instead of "FOR AWHILE."

You only buy your beer and soda by the case.

You think the roads in any other state are smooth.

You know the Penn State cheer. (WE ARE...PENN STATE!)

Hearing horses clopping down a paved street doesn't bring you to the window to see what's going on outside.

You never see any Confederate flags except on the Gettysburg battlefield.

You prefer Hershey's chocolate to Godiva.

You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

School closings due to snow take the radio stations half an hour to finish because just about every town has its own school district.

When someone says 1972, you think, "Agnes," and when someone says 1979, you think, "TMI."

You call sloppy joes "barbecue."

You think Medium Rare equals Well Done.

When it snows, they put cinders on the roads instead of sand.

You only own three spices: salt, pepper and ketchup.

You have ten favorite recipes for venison.

Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

The local paper covers National and International headlines on one page, but requires six pages for local sports.

You think the start of deer hunting is a national holiday.

You remember fondly days of youth known as, "Snow Days."

Words like: gumband, buggie, hoagie, chipped beef, scrapple, actually mean something to you.

You think Fasnacht Day and Groundhog Day are national holidays.

The verb "to be" is useless: "Does Fido need out?"

You know what a Turkey Hill is . . .
. . . and you've ditched school to hang out there.
. . . and they're the only place that sells your favorite beverage.

You've corrected all the errors while watching Witness.

"Dinner" and "supper" are different concepts entirely.

You reocognize "Twin Kiss" and "Freez and Frizz," knowing that Dairy Queen is a pale imitation.

Dutch Wonderland is neither Dutch nor much of a Wonderland.

WGAL is the source of all local celebrities and they create quite a stir when they shop in the supermarket.

The Green Dragon ain't no Chinese restaurant.

Three words: Red Beet Eggs.

You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Lancaster County friends.

[alkytrio666]

Originally Posted by Roderick Usher

Nope, not that In-n-out

This is the best burger chain in the world. It's older than McD's but they don't have freezers for anything for but the ice that goes in the soda. Everything else is fresh.

Fresh potatoes are sliced in front of you for fries. Milkshakes are made from real milk & real ice cream. They only do burgers, fries & shakes.

Fan-fucking-tastic!

I was born in Cali...

I've got my "In-N-Out" t-shirt...:)

[dewaholic]

Originally Posted by The STE

Bolded ones are especially true or apply to me specifically


You love toasted ravioli with Budweiser beer.

"Vacation" is a choice between Silver Dollar City and Lake of the Ozarks.

You can find Pestalozzi Street by aroma alone.

You can get anywhere in 20 minutes, except on highway 40.

You can debate for 30 minutes whether Missouri Baking or Marge Amighetti makes the best Italian bread.

You know what "Party Cove" is, and where the "lake" is.

You still can't believe the Arena is gone.

Your first question to a new person is, "Where did you go to High School?"

Your non-Dr. Zaiusan friends always ask if you're aware there is no "r" in "wash."

You know at least one person who's gotten hurt at Johnson Shut-ins.

You know in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska in football.

You think the four major food groups are Beef, Pork, Budweiser and Imo's.

You know there are really only three salad dressings: Imo's, Zia's and Rich and Charlie's.

You'll pay for your kid to go to college unless they want to go to KU.

You would rather have a root canal without anesthetic than drive on Manchester on a Saturday afternoon.

It just doesn't seem like a wedding without mostaciolli. AND YOU PRONOUNCE IT 'MUSKACHOLLI'. The balance of the menu is ham, boiled roast beef, string beans with ham and of course pitchers of Busch Bavarian (class weddings have Bud)

You know, within a three-mile radius, where another Dr. Zaiusan grew up as soon as they open their mouth.

You know what a Pork Steak is...and what kind of sauce to put on it!

Everyone in your family has floated the Meramec River at least once.

A hoosier is someone that lives just south of Chouteau, not a person from Indiana.

You have made fun of Mike Shanahan and tried to imitate him ordering another cold, frosty Busch Bavarian Beer.

You have listened to Mike's broadcast on KMOX, while watching the game on TV and wonder what game he is watching. A tear forms in your eye as someone mentions their favorite Jack Buck story.

You've said, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity."

Your favorite summer treat is handed to you upside-down ([B]This is true for me as well, but I doubt it's the same thing that whoever wrote this is thinking of
You can get anywhere in 20 minutes, except on highway 40

You bleed Blue between September and May

Well this is my state. But the ones that apply to me are.......
You've said, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity"

Your first question to a new person is, "Where did you go to High School?"

You still can't believe the Arena is gone.

You can get anywhere in 20 minutes, except on highway 40

Damn Missouri is boring

[Amphibious Wretch]

You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian

You feel guilty throwing an aluminum can in the trash.

You use the words "sun break" and know what it means.

You know more than 10 words to describe a cup of coffee.

You know what a dry cappachino is.

You obey all traffic laws EXCEPT "keep right except to pass."

You know at least eight people who work for either Microsoft or Boeing.

You invite twice as many people as you really want to a party since only half will actually show up.

You know what Lutefiske is.

You personally know someone from Alaska.

You consider floating bridges a pain in the butt, not an engineering marvel.

You know how to pronounce "Sequim", "Puyallup" and "Issaquah."

You have roots in Oregon, Idaho or Montana, but wanted a high paying job.

You've tried to get a job in Alaska, especially a summer job only.

You think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, on snow or water.

You know at least three Microsoft burnouts, of which two are millionaires.

You use more than 5 words to order a cup of coffee. "I want to order an unleaded, double, short, skinny, wet cappuccino with a shot of Amaretto please."

A "designer" wardrobe comes from REI, Eddie Bauer, Lands End, and Birkenstock.

You consider it a sunny day if the sun is visible at some point of the day.

You've been "snow" skiing in the RAIN more than in the snow.

When you're discussing rainforests and volcanoes, you're NOT talking about Hawaii.

You Remember the Kingdome

You have tried to forget about WTO

You know how BLUE the skies are here compared to Eastern Washington

The guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like Phyllis Diller is really a trans named Eva Destruction that used to play with Hole.

You're still used to people not from Seattle asking you about the Seattle music scene, even though it was actually dead 5 years before they ever heard of it.

Your car insurance costs more because your neighbors don't have any!

Your mayor is straight, 1/2 your friends are gay, the man who delivers your mail has a bumper sticker that reads "when they pry it from my cold dead fingers....", and your Burger World drive thru order taker was a computer millionaire last week.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Seattle.

[Despare]

I liked this thread so I decided to bring it back to life.

Driving Tips When Visiting Detroit
For those planning to visit Detroit...

You must learn to pronounce the city name. It's Di-troit. NOT DEE-troit. If you pronounce it DEE-Troit then we will assume you are from Toledo and here for the country Music hoe-down.

Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Detroit has its own version of traffic rules... Hold on and pray!

The morning rush hour is from 6:00am to 10:00am. The evening rush hour is from 3:00pm to 7:00pm. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. Weekends are open game.

If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. If you're first off the starting line when the light turns green, count to five before going. This will avoid getting in the way of cross-traffic who just ran their yellow light to keep from getting shot.

Schoenherr can ONLY be properly pronounced by a native of the Detroit metro area. That goes for Gratiot too.

Construction and renovation on I-94, I-96, I-75 and I-275 is a way of life. Just deal with it.

If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory defect or they are "out-of-towners."

All old men with white hair wearing a hat have total right-of-way.

The minimum acceptable speed on I-696 is 85 regardless of the posted speeds. Anything less is considered downright SISSY. Oh, and don't even think of allowing more than one car length between cars!

The attractive wrought iron on the windows and doors in Detroit is NOT ornamental. "DO NOT get out of your car"

Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says "Keep honking, I'm reloading."

If you are in the left lane, and only going 70 in a 60 mph zone, people are not waving 'because they are so friendly in Detroit.' I would suggest you duck.

I-275/I-696 is our daily version of NASCAR.

It's not M-10, it's "the Lodge."

That's not a lake, it's a pothole.

If someone tells you it's on Outer Drive, you better hope you have a map.

The left turn is simple. If you want to turn left, go a 1/4 of a mile past your turn, get to the left, then make a left, then make a right. NOW you have gone left

[Zero]

it snows

in winter you complain about the snow

in spring you wonder when the snow will melt

in fall you wonder when the snows will start

in summer you wonder if the temperature is realted to how much snow you will get

the only time you talk to other people is when discussing the above

the only time you talk to neighbors is when helping to shovel out their driveway or push out their car - or when they are doing this for you

your main preoccupation is how long the handle on your snow shovel will last

you chuckle at the idea of global warming - but secretly pray to god it is true

you take particular joy in newcomers whom you can tease and taunt about the coming snow

no matter how bad the snow is you always talk about how its not nearly as bad as the winter of *fill in the blank*

snow boots are referred to as 'upstate guccis'

you get adept at stepping over the 'yellow patches' in the snow

you start winterizing the house in august
-(which reminds me i've got to start putting my weather stripping up)

[missmacabre]

You Know You're From Canada When...
You're not offended by the term, "Homo Milk."
You understand the phrase, "Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."
You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
You drink pop, not soda.
You know what a Mickey and 2-4 are.
You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars.
You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
You brag to Americans that: , Jim Carrey, Mike Meyers, Tom Green, and many more are Canadians.
You know that the C.E.O. of American Airlines is a Canadian!
You know what a touque is.
You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed" not "Zee".
You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan."
You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada."
You were in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
"Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary and more polite than, "Huh?"
Winter. Whenever you want it. And then some.
There's German food, Italian food, Chinese food, Armenian food, American food, but NO Canadian food.
You like the Americans a little because they don't want Quebec either.
Contests run by anyone other than the government have "skill-testing questions" that winners must answer correctly before they can claim a prize. Canadian lottery winnings are non-taxable!
Everything is labelled in English and French.
Milk comes in plastic bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
You say 'aboot' not 'about'
There are more pages about Hockey than the news in the newspapers
You know what the plug at the front of the car is for
You can ALMOST understand what Jean Chrétien says
You know what are Tim Horton, Zellers and Canadian Tire
You have a canadian flag sewn on your backpack (unless you live in Québec)
You go overseas and insist that you are Canadian when people hear your accent to make sure they won't think you are American