Dear IA

[VampiricClown]

Originally posted by stubbornforgey
Vampric Clown reminds me so much of
one of my freinds 'silk'
You just want to wrap a cottonball around him and keep him safe..

Is that a good thing or bad?:confused:

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by Spallalala
Dear I.A,

I have had this problem for sometime now and really need to get it under control. I fart too much. So uh..Can you help me ?

Yes, yes I can. This is not a mental problem, this is your body telling you something's wrong. I suggest you start listening to your body; start jogging more, eat less pasta and red meat, and start using enemas.... lots of em'.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by Zero
Dear IA:

I stupidly made a flippant comment to a 'friend' that he (or she) should start an advice thread on a message board. . . well, sadly, he (or it) did so and now its a silly embarassing disaster. . . what should I do?

Signed,
Embarassed for him on HDC

:D

Hmm... kill yourself?

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by VampiricClown
Dear IA,

I am starting to feel that my welcome on HDC has been worn out. What should I do?

-_-VampiricClown-_-

You can go somewhere else, or you could write a letter to someone you love sharing your distaste. Again, not my area of expertise.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by alkytrio666
Dear I.A.

I've been reading your column ever since it came out. I'm a huge fan!

But anyway, here's my question:

Should I fake my orgasms?

Thanks!

-Kev

Faking orgasms is hard for men to do. The semen's a dead giveaway. Maybe you could say you're pulling out then put your penis out of view, and let your facial expression give the IMPRESSION you ejaculated on the floor, or a coat... or a chair.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by Taom
Dear IA;


I know a person who we shall not mention by name, but his welcome has been worn out. How do I tell him this without hurting his feelings?

Seems as though you already did. I suggest you and this person have a clsoe one on one... and start kissing each other, hardcore.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by mothermold
dear I.A.,

my girlfriend is upset with me because i insist on listening to "the battle hymn of the republic" during lovemaking....she claims it's distracting,i tell her it inspires me....what to do? please help sort this mess out I.A.



-momo

You should explain to her that this music is for both of you. Without it, the passionate love-making you two experience is all but lost... a slow-paced, boring experience where everyone ends up crying. She'll understand.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by wood_elf_pansy
Dear IA,
(this is an actual question sent in to an advice column I just found)My boyfriend wants to have sex with me, I'm a virgin and I'm 13, I really don't know and I'm not really comfortable with my body.Where would be the best place to have sex, and do you think I should shave my pussy or no?
-Young and Confused

As an answer to your first question, you should only have sex when you're absolutely ready. And you're only ready when your significant other TELLS you that you are. If your boyfriend says its time to go, it's time to GO.

In answer to question two, you're 12. How hairy can your *edit* be?

Oh, and have sex in a bed.... usually a good choice.

[ItsAlive75]

Originally posted by VampiricClown
Dear IA,

Someone isn't answering their column. How should I let them know that they should?

-_-Broken Disaster-_-

I apologize for my lack of replies, I've been busy. But I WILL answer them all all in a row right now.

[VampiricClown]

Dear IA,

I have reached my 1,000 post goal. Should I leave HDC now?

-_-VampiricClown-_-