Fatherly Love

[MoonLit Meadow]

Sorry to hear things are kinda messy with your dad, Jay..

Have you attempted trying to have a "normal" conversation with him though? I mean...really try...no raising your voice, or yelling...just the two of you talking and agreeing to disagree a little.

I know it may be hard, but since he doesn't seem to want to approach YOU and do it...maybe you could just approach him and be as nice as possible...just calm, and tell him that you want to talk about a few things...tell him that you know he may not agree with all of your choices, but they're your choices/mistakes to make.

However, try and listen to his points too...he's a parent...and although he may not be going about it the right way, I'm sure he really does care...and I'm sure he really does just want the best for you...just let him know that he doesn't have to be so extreme about it...that you'd rather he just have a conversation with you...not an argument. Take a little blame, but don't be afraid to let him know what hurts you too.

Just my opinion, but hope it might help some :)

[barbra]

hey jay, here is some advice from the resident dumb ass..


your dad doesn't hang out with you so he only knows what he sees and from what you put out there in this thread its not really a comforting picture. NOT saying you ARE the loser your dad thinks you are, but really as of right now, being part of THIS generation with no high school diploma, you are not going to last long unless you get lucky. Really, right now, what are you looking at? Managment at a Wendys? Its not a bad job, but if you get bumped up in the company instead of being hired into that position your sallery will be considerably less.

In my eyes pot is not a drug just illegal so I have nothing to say about that.

Joining the armed forces is not a bad idea. The airforce is a real pansey operation and they stay in hotels and not camps..

If you have the means I say move out and try your hand at the world. You'll end up apperciating your dad more and in turn he will more than likely respect you more if you do well for your self.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
The one thing a kid HAS to do is obey - and the reaon isnt for a power trip - its for safety ..

get away from that, dont pick that up, stop right there ..
you know - the kind of things that potentially save a kids life ..

i'm also sick of the ADD thing but i'm not blind to the fact that he needs to learn to listen - immediately - or he's going to run in front of a car one day.

i'm just as sick of the parents that say 'ah they're just kids' while they chit chat with each other and their little darlings are fucking around destroying someone elses property, etc ... i also see that all the time.

I agree with this 100%...I just believe that it can be accomplished WITHOUT drugs...People have been raising kids for quite a few years before these drugs were introduced......And I wouldn't excuse bad behavior as 'he's/she's just a kid'...I've seen it and it pisses me off to no end, I would NEVER allow my kids to destroy someone else's property, or to hurt someone (which they would never have any intention of doing anyway, because that's the way they were raised) BUT...I HAVE seen people just shrug their shoulders when their kids do shit like that...It's a complete and total lack of respect, the parents who don't seem to give a shit, obviously have no respect for anyone else or their property, so it would be IMPOSSIBLE for them to teach their kids respect...

I'm saying, being hyper and not paying attention are VERY common among children...You weren't like that when YOU were a child?

My kids DO pay attention when it's a matter of safety, as you have mentioned, because I made DAMN sure those things were made perfectly clear...But, as for trying to teach them things (as in school lessons, or washing dishes, most chores) if they aren't interested, it's difficult to get them to sit and pay attention...(Even adults fall asleep in church, know what I'm sayin'?)...And THAT CAN be attributed to being a kid...

It's about how they are raised and supervised...Not what drug seems to work best...

@Urge...Your son is gonna be fine...Usually kids like him are of above average intelligence, they don't listen in class because the material usually becomes repetitive to them...Kid's wanna learn new things, not rehash all the crap they already know...They need to have their minds stimulated with more than what they are being offered...These kids can become destructive just because they get so frustrated and don't know how to vent, especially at such a young age...Most intelligent kids take things apart to see how they work, that's often viewed as being destructive, but for the child it's a learning process...I'd be willing to bet that your child is very independent, and likes to do things HIS way...You'll see when he's older that he is an intelligent person, who makes up his own mind, forms and sticks to his own opinions, and doesn't follow the crowd...

I applaud you for taking the 'non-medicated' route...All these kids really need is love, PATIENCE, understanding, discipline, and supervision...NOT drugs...