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#21
06-02-2005, 11:45 AM
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I christen thee, Count Spatula.
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#22
06-02-2005, 12:04 PM
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Im with Cheeba, Im all about the knife. The other night at work I actually had to show some one how to use a steal to sharpen their blades. They had never even used a whetstone!!! Jesus Fucking Christ, thats like being a writter and not knowing how to use a pen.
__________________
I feel like a balloon floating higher I’m touching a distant moon I don’t think I’ll come down anytime soon Ah my kitten I am so glad you’re the way you are You’re my favorite living human by far ’cause you make this frightening world less bizarre
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#23
06-02-2005, 02:35 PM
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*hangs head even lower in informercial purchase shame*
I also have purchased: Tanning Bed *broken* A RONCO Rotissierie *broken* A Scunci (sp) Steamer *used it for about a year cleaning my cars, steaming engines, even worked great for steaming out fouled powder in rifles, but alas it too is broken* *resisted urge to buy Elvis collector plates* phew.......
__________________
"~The more defects a man may have, the older he is, the less lovable, the more resounding his success~ Marquis de Sade"
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#24
06-02-2005, 04:37 PM
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There was an informercial for an outdoor bouncing pit that was trying EVERYTHING to sell the stupid product.
"With the bouncing pit, you'll know EXACTLY where your child is! He won't be running into the street or talking to strangers!" "It's so light! If you use it indoors, you can literally lift it up and vaccuum under it!" "The bouncing pit is so safe! You could literally unload this shotgun INTO the bouncing pit, and your child would come out almost UNHARMED!"
__________________
MISINTUPITATED- The act of removing the spine by use of fire. DEVESTED- The removal of one's vest. SCTUPP- To deficate on a woman after nonconsensual sex.
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#25
06-09-2005, 03:38 PM
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a HA! i finally thought of one
only cuz ive spent many a sleepless night watchig these craps. i rreally like the food ones, just cuz.. well its food! anyone seen those ones about those thermal pots? i always wondered about those ANYWAY. i got lazy and right now am heating up a queadilla in the microwave(ghetto fabulous) when i remembered wbout the 'magic bullet' its basically like a coffee grinder, slightly bigger, the idea being u can grind ur food in it super fast. making salsa, chicken salad, guacamole, etc etc. 'make your food in 5 seconds time, dont bust out that bulky blender or chop everything by hand!' jackasses.. u hafto CUT and PEEL everything before u stick it in the machine. that and of course its gonna eb powerful, the damn blades are as big as the bowl itself (as opposed to a blender, the blades ar at the bottom and theres all that xtra space) anyway.. they put cheese, tomatoes, peppers and chicken together and bledned it. then the stuck it in 2 tortillas and put it in the microwave. but when theyt ook it out, the damn thing had grill marks on it! GRRRRRRRRRR :mad:
__________________
http://artpad.art.com/gallery/?iclbyo12peks IN REMEMBRANCE OF BARF CUM - .................. ^_^
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#26
06-10-2005, 05:14 AM
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Wasnt "Magic Bullet" also a name for a silver vibrator? I believe i once saw an add for one in "Hustler: Busty Beauties" several years ago. How embarrasing that would be? Getting sued by a dildo company for copyright infringement....
__________________
Some misguided people decided I was funny enough to pay. See if they're right: http://www.cracked.com/members/Vodstok/ (I tweet pretty hardcore, too)
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#27
06-10-2005, 09:36 AM
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Quote:
__________________
...  If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit My Karma ran over my Dogma God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him I'm suffocating in what's become of me... The rancid remains of what I used to be
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#28
06-10-2005, 09:40 AM
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Quote:
sounds like those old meat grinders olf folks had - they attach to the end of the table and you feed meat into in and it comes out in these long worms ... great devices - hard to clean .. actually dont they have one in one of the monty python credit sequences ? and in The Wall .. (apparently the british like these things :)
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#29
12-31-2006, 04:48 AM
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So, any new ones?...I haven't watched television in FOREVER...You guys still laughing at these stupid things?...Does it seem that there are more now, or less than there were about a year ago?...You guys actually FALLING for any of them? ;)
__________________
... If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit My Karma ran over my Dogma God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him I'm suffocating in what's become of me... The rancid remains of what I used to be
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#30
12-31-2006, 05:46 AM
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those damned workout machines..sheesh..
natural glow and the godammned george foreman ovens. I hate that 'but wait'..order now and you'll receive another set absolutely free.. thats right..and you'll also receive a set of ginseng knives' SO CALL NOW'..'rolls her eyes'
__________________
my opinion counts dammit so says my Lord :D
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