Livin' it HDC (The Horror.Com Soap)

[ferretchucker]

thanks. This is good for me considering my movie writing career didn't go too well with HDC the movie 3. I think it's because with them you are limeted to characters and there's one particular storyline. Sorry newb but I had to get rid of a main character seeing as dude isnt dead, rayne isn't, crab isn't and neither am I. I'm just paralyzed. I think it's kind of ironic. I'm one of our youngest regular members and am still (unfortunately) a virgin (I stick with the law!), and yet my character is one of the oldest and is a sex addict (alas, no more).

[ferretchucker]

next part up tonight. I've been literally making this up a couple of seconds before I write it down. So, any ideas for tonight?

[crabapple]

Yeah! You gotta work in some little albino ferrets, like someone can have a ferret babysitting service or something, I swear it NEEDS it, it would lend such depth, you really gotta add that hoochie poochie stuff. Maybe one of the characters can be an expert in small animal feeding, something along those lines. Rats, bunnies, maybe even a cat with a cold sneezing. Comedy relief.

My favorite part was "Peppermints? Pepper spray?" That was so weird and funny.

[ferretchucker]

thanks....i think. and i did use hoochie poochie.

[crabapple]

Oh yes! I see you did. It went by so fast, when Zero was called a "hoochie poochie monkey," I almost didn't see it. I guess I wanted a whole scene devoted to that. But I'll take what I can get by golly! Good work, it's getting even scarier.

[Psycom5k]

I want in, make me zero's evil henchman or something, oh oh oh... and like... i want a cane!!! yeah the cane would be sweet. and it would be a sword cane, and it would have a zilver monkey head for the top part.

[ferretchucker]

Opening credits role, fade to the hospital. Horrorobsessed is walking down a hallway. Somebody runs up to join her.

Horrorobsessed: Look, I listened to your advice but I don't think I can talk to him yet.

Hammerfan: I'm not saying you have to, but I just think it would clear things up a bit between you. I mean, what's he supposed to think? He saw it happen so lying is out the window.

Horrorobsessed: Just...just let me think about this okay.

She turns into a room with a patient in it.

Horrorobsessed: Hi...I heard what happened. I...I knew him. Not very well though. We got chatting in his bar a bit. He lives near me.

Crabapple: You live in Readers Row?

Horrorobsessed: Yeh...why?

Crabapple: I'm crab. Crab apple. I'm the one who was shot.

Horrorobsessed: Oh...oh my god. I just thought you were here when he died.

Crabapple: So where are you living?

Horrorobsessed: With XtRaVa...you do know that they caught bloodrayne and that other guy. Newb shot him.

Crabapple: I know. He was my only friend. He never judged me. Not really a friend but at least not an enemy. And he saved my life. I just owe him so much.

Horrorobsessed: I just came here to tell you your mother is on her way, oh...here she is.

An old woman walks in. She's crying.

Crabapple: Mum. It's okay. I'm alive.

next segment up soon. I'm just going out.

[ferretchucker]

Crabs mum: I...I have something to tell you.

Crab: Oh god. You haven't got another man have you? If he's been hurting you!

CM: No...it's about Newb.

Crab: Oh. Well. What? How do you know him.

CM: Because he's your brother.

Crab: What?

Fade into the police station. Mothman is talking to Kemal.

Mothman: Look! Here.

He pauses the tape and points to a tree.

Mothman: See? Theres a guy there and now...

The figure drops down. and goes into the bush.

Kemal: How did we miss this?

Mothman: Because of what was happening in the bottom of the screen.

The still picture shows horrorobsessed being attacked.

Mothman: So, if we can just rewind this tape we should be able to see who it is. I had a quick look but thought it best if you were here incase I was just imagining things.

They rewind the tape. a person in a black hood and hat is walking along. He goes into the alley beside the house and VC groceries.

Mothman: So there was no luck with the hat?

Kemal: No, didn't know a thing.

HE fast forwards the tape and there is no sign of the man.

Mothman: What the? Where is he?

Kemal: I think I know. Get your coat.

They walk out. Cut to Yuki's. Everybody is quiet and dressed in black.

Ferretchucker: 5 minutes. Better get to the church.

Most of the people leave. Cut to the inside of a church where people are coming into. Several people are crying. The camera swings around slowly to show an open coffin.

Rod: Good morning everyone. Shall we begin?

Fade to the hospital and Crab is still confused.

Crab: How can we...what?

CM: I was 15 years old. I was too young to have a child. I just. I just couldn't. I gave him to my friend. Then she...then she died and her sister took her. Typical she moved to Readers Row, then of course, when you were an adult, you moved there too.

Crab: But that means...did he know?

CM: Yes. I told him. I told him not to tell you. You couldn't handle it! I couldn't let you know!

Crab: You mean, I let my older brother risk his life then die for me? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME? GET OUT! GET OUT! NURSE!

A nurse comes in and removes CM.

Fade back into the church.

Rod: If you wish, you are allowed to go to the body of are friend and say your final goodbyes.

Most of the people get up. They walk past the coffin.

__V__: Thanks mate. You gave me a job when you died. He laughs sadly.

Jenna: Bye Newb. Thanks for the booze.

XtRaVa: Wow. Has it really been 12 years? Sorry I wasn't there for your last days. I always thought we'd die in some strange lightning based accident. Bye Newb. It was fun.

Ferretchucker: I'm so sorry. It was my fault. If only I hadn't told you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I know you can't here me but. Thanks for everything you did for me. Thanks. I never imagined the last word I said to you would be groceries. Bye.

Dante: Well. You gave me a free drink when I was first 21. You loaned me money so I could get my flat and you even tried to hook me up with that woman. I'm just glad I got to return the favour before you died. I hope you take that hankerchief I gave you to the afterlife. There might be pollen.

Several other people say their goodbyes and the camera zooms out backwards through the door. and the door closes until it shows that we're looking through the eyes of a camera lense. The shutter goes and a flash then the closing credits role.

[massacre man]

Alright, a tip on making this better, take the next story you plan on doing, and put more me in it.

[ferretchucker]

okay, maybe we'll see you in sundays episode.