What movie killer would you be least afraid of?

[Dr.Kelvinstein]

I know most folks will probably go with a certain killer doll, but I'd say Hannibal Lector. I'd whup his hammy, overacting ass real good.

[Sam The Egg]

Freddy, by simple lack of logic. You wake up, Freddy can't kill you. Nancy burns herself, she wakes up. The pain makes her wake up. If Freddy cuts you, doesn't that hurt? Freddy killing is counter-productive by the simple fact that if he hurts them, by all logic they should wake up automatically. He'd have to do it quick, like break their neck or something.

[Dr.Kelvinstein]

I never put that much thought into a Nightmare movie, but damn, I guess you're right. Freddy would almost have to kill you with the first blow to have any effect. But you gotta admit, braining Hannibal Lector with a lamp or a baseball bat or whatever else comes to hand would be loads more fun.

[Sam The Egg]

Just for the sheer psychological impact, I would rather see Freddy vs. Hannibal than Freddy vs. Jason. If my brain had a penis, that movie would give it a hard-on

[Dr.Kelvinstein]

When asked if there was something sexual in women being stalked in most of his movies, Brian DePalma said it was simply common sense. A man being stalked wasn't as scary because they could probably give the killer a run for his money in any fisticuffs that might ensue.

[Sam The Egg]

OMG SEXCISM!!!1

[Dr.Kelvinstein]

I don't think it's sexcism as much as a size thing. I also think Hannibal should get smacked around for remaking Manhunter. Michael Mann is smoother than grape jelly.

[Sam The Egg]

grape jelly is sticky and kinda lumpy

[Dr.Kelvinstein]

Not the Extra Smoothy brand of grape jelly. There's a picture of Corey Fieldman on the label, and the company is owned by Kip Winger. I think Crispin Glover has stocks.

[Sam The Egg]

I just know of Smuckers