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I say cut these people out of your life, even if they are your family. They have a way of poisoning and shitting on anything's that's good, and it will just seep into the life you've made for yourself. I've learned that blood isn't thicker than water, and all that counts is the family you make, by surrounding yourself with people whom you trust and love and give you the same in return. That's all one can do.
As for your brother, he knows you're there for him. If he doesn't decide to do anything to remedy his situation by taking you up on your offer, that's also on him. It fucking sucks, I know, but you can't force people to be strong. They just are what they are, and get there on their own terms, just like you did. You seem happy in your life with your girl and friends. Don't let them ruin it.
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Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken.
Thug means never having to say you're sorry.
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