[Doc Faustus]

I would spray you with baboon pheromones and then toss you in an enclosure with AIDS infected babboons. Then, when they get exhausted, I'll airlift you to a secret undisclosed location where I will spike your food with a moderately effective AIDS cocktail. Then after years of suffering through AIDS with slight remission, I would let you go, but not before spraying you once more with babboon pheromones and posting babboon guards right outside your door for more fun. Then, the bus that picks you up to return you to a normal life will be full of babboons. Babboons with time bombs strapped to their chests that will go off after another hour of simian misery.