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I'm sorry, that sounds horrible. My heart really goes out to you.
I've been through a couple of yucky situations with my kids. I'd never take my little one to the ER unless the fever was waaaay high and sustained.
I feel that the most dangerous place in the world for an infant is the ER. The worst, most anti-biotic resistant strains of infections reside there - way worse than any cough or fever. But then again I'm anti-establishment to the core and distrust the medical/pharmaceutical industry.
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"Little, vicious minds abound with anger and revenge, and are incapable of feeling the pleasure of forgiving their enemies."
Earl of Chesterfield
"A man that studieth revenge keeps his own wounds green, which otherwise would heal and do well."
Francis Bacon
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