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Old 08-23-2007, 01:22 PM
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ferretchucker ferretchucker is offline
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i had no ideas and that was on tele. oh well.

next segment up now.

On top of the roof, massacre man regains wakes up.

Massacre Man: Fuck this. I'm goin' to my cabin. Maybe finish Harry potter. I can't wait for hermiones topless scene!

He gets up, holding his side, then limps away.

Meanwhile, in the woods, horrorobsessed is running away as fast as she can.


Horrorobsessed: Why...does...this...shit..always...happen...to me?!

Some rustling can be heard in the distance. She stops still for a second. Suddenly, out of a bush, ferretchucker appears, grabbing her leg.

Horrorobsessed: Get the fuck off me!

She kicks him in the face. He stops moving, Then she notices the machette in his hands.

Horrorobsessed: Finally! These fucking deadites wont know what hit 'em!

She tries to take the macheete, but ferretchucker's hands have a tight grip so instead, she picks up him. She walks on into the trees.

horrorobsessed: I think this is where massacre man one tried to seduce - I'm talking to myself. Oh crap, i feel like I'm commentating for some viewer/listener/reader.

She arrives at a small wooden hut. There's a murky swamp next to it that could easily have an alligator in it. There appears to be a candle on in one of the rooms. She knocks on the door.

Horrorobsessed: Hello!

No Answer.

Horrorobsessed: Massacre Man! It's me, Horrorobsessed! Let me in!

The door earily swings open.

Horrorobsessed: Thanks...

She steps inside, dragging ferretchuckers body. He hits his head on every step up to the inside. She drops the body and decides now is a good time. She walks into the kitchen, gets a knife and uses it to hack off his hand. after she is finished and he is moaning slightly, she takes the machette and decides to go to the room with a candle.

Horrorobsessed: Hello? Who's there? Jesus? Is that you.

She's a figure in a cloak with the hood down. She recognises the face as that of vampiricclown. he appears to still be breathing...slowly. She then looks across at the armchair and sitting in it is no other than...MOTHMAN!

Horrorobsessed: YOU! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LIT THE CANDLE!

Mothman: And...

Horrorobsessed: And broke into the cabin?

Mothman: And...

Horrorobsessed: Realeased the deadites!

Mothman: BINGO! Yes, I did it.

Horrorobsessed: To get revenge on __V__ for taking your spot on television! For massacre man stealing your girlfriend and for me...for me sleeping with your father and breaking up your family.

Mothman: Wrong! I did it for fun! Ever had really long nights? ever got bored of monopoly and cluedo? Ever found some book with things to raise the dead? Ever wanted a zombie wife who never complains no matter what you do to her?

At that precise moment, massacre man bursts in through the door, holding a newly bought copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows whilst unzipping his trousers.

Massacre Man: What the fuck are you to doing here?

Mothman: Just in time! SICK 'EM BOYS!

Outside, some movement and rustling can be heard drawing closer. Grunting and shouting. Then, all of a sudden, the cabin is surrounded by Deadites, and the two only characters who have played a main part in this and the last one and survived until this moment are surrounded. Just then, the ceiling breaks and the noise of a helicopter can be heard. Somebody in black clothing lowers themselves into the cabin. They take off their mask.

Horrorobsessed: BLOODRAYNE!

To be continued...
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