Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have enough time
Why were men put on earth?
Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn
Why don't women have men's brains?
Because they don't have penises to put them in
What do electric trains and breasts have in common?
They're intended for children, but men usually play with them
Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
Because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock
Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
So they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties
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If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance...Baffle 'em with bullshit
My Karma ran over my Dogma
God WAS my co-pilot...But, we crashed in the mountains and...I had to eat him
I'm suffocating in what's become of me...
The rancid remains of what I used to be
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