[Yellow Jacket]

House of the Dead 2

This is hands-down the most surprising movie so far this year! I would've never thought that a sequel to one of the shittiest movies ever made could be so much damn fun! I didn't catch it on Sc-Fi (because that channel sucks and cuts too much shit out), and I don't know if it had tits and gore, but the DVD release was packed with it. Tits galore and gore amore! Now, there are some flaws in this stellar sequel. First of all, the opening sucked major donkey-dong. It sucked Donkey Kong's dong. Supersoakers and an invasion of a slumber party was not the way to go. Especially since there were no titties to go with it (except for that wet t-shirt). Also, the opening credits were dumb as hell! I didn't like the clips they added with the opening credits. They just seemed too rushed. Sid Haig (Captain Spaulding from House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects) has a cameo in this movie, but doesn't stay long. I honestly believe it was because he didn't want to be there. I mean, he didn't do to much of a good job with his small role (it wasn't bad, just wasn't good either). But, that's just my humble opinion. All of this aside, House of the Dead 2 was a pleasuring masturbation of a film! Don't let the House of the Dead title throw you off. This is nothing like the original. Hell, this was what the original should've been like!

4 out of 5 stars