Quote:
Originally posted by novakru
I like it.
Could be more detailed.
I would like to know WHY Daniel feels this way,the beginning of this hatred he has,maybe a reason to understand his pain....send this in to some of those mags that have short horror stories-see if they bite.
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It's good, you have a nice descriptive style but I would flesh it out a little more if you did consider sending it out to magazines. Maybe show a little of how Daniel see the world around him (not just his victim) to generate a greater sense of foreboding.