[MrShape]

Oh, fuck it! I'M announcing my candiacy for president. I can do this, I'll just make campain promises that I know I can keep:

As your president, I promise to: A) Funnel your tax dollars into things that benifit my own personal interests. B) Take bribes from corrupt buisness and government officials and C) Have as many affairs with white house interns as I can get say yes.

Then when I come up for reelection in four years I can say "Hey, I kept my promises. You should see my swiss bank account." It could work.