[Egekrusher]

I don't know if I can say the worst thing I've ever done without everyone here hating me. I don't know if I can even remember the worst thing I've ever done. I'm pretty good at blocking out memories.

I do have one that I can share.

I was 17 years old. I was at a friend's birthday party. He always had the biggest parties out of anyone I knew. He was one of those guys who managed to transcend social barriers and befriend all different classes and cliques of people. There were about 100 people there, and 2 kegs. All just details, not really too signifigant to the story.

One of my so-called "friends" (I hated his guts) was trying to get a girl into bed. I was very attracted to this girl, though it was the first time I had met her. I decided to steal the girl from him. She wasn't really attracted to him in the first place, though the only reason she came to the party was to hang out with him.

I swept her off of her feet. I wooed her, I did my best to be a gentleman. I convinced her to come home with me. She didn't have any place to stay, as the person who brought her to the party ditched her. You should have seen the look on my friends face, I'll never forget it. He looked pissed off and dissapointed all at the same time. I almost felt sorry for him, but this was revenge for many, many cases of petty thievery on his part.

I was a virgin before that night. I talked her into having sex with me. I used my depression to my advantage. Believe me guys, that works VERY well with the ladies, though it makes you feel like a complete asshole.

The "relationship" lasted four days. It turns out that I wasn't the only one who was horribly depressed. In the end though, I used that same depression to get myself out of the situation.

I regret what I did with every ounce of my soul. I wish that I had not lost my virginity in such a manner. I still can't forgive myself for being such a manipulative asshole. It's completely out of character for me.

That's just the tip of the iceberg too. If there IS a Hell, then I know that I'm going there. Fortunately, that's all a bunch of bullshit.