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-   -   Lamest movie monsters (https://www.horror.com/forum/showthread.php?t=5540)

Vodstok 04-21-2004 09:54 AM

Lamest movie monsters
 
I know there was another one of these kicking around, but i am lazy. (I just ate a big mac)

What movie monsters just suck? It could be that the premise is just lame, or it might be another "jaws with another animal" movie, or the basic idea of the monster is so implausible or boring that you think "Why did they bother?"


A few of my votes:
The snake from Anaconda. The assholes that made that movie apparently did research on how snakes DONT behave, and then made a movie out of it.

The movie frogs..... What idiot thought a movie about killer frogs was a good idea? Not even giant frogs, but Bullfrogs.

then there is Peter Benchley's Creature. They had to say Peter Benchley's, other wise people would have been waiting for the rest of the title with just "creature". Wow, amphibious man-shark. 30 years after jaws, he comes up with "amphibious man-shark". Question, what do you do with a one-trick pony that forgot how to do his trick?

You shoot him.

Sistinas 04-21-2004 10:11 AM

The worms in Squirm! were pretty stupid.

Vodstok 04-21-2004 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sistinas
The worms in Squirm! were pretty stupid.
hehe, i saw that on MST3K.. I was actually going to mention that one, too, how's that for funny? I like how when they had a scene with one worm, it was obviously an artificial fishing lure on a line.

Unaboner3000 04-21-2004 02:07 PM

Anyone see Skeeter. An assirific film with assirific monsters.

sleepaway 04-22-2004 03:18 AM

Anything CGI.

Rawhead Rex

The beach ball in Dark Star.

Totem

Ghoulies

Vodstok 04-22-2004 03:59 AM

I remember seeing Daarkstar as a kid. One of my freinds said it was the funniest thing he had seen. After watching it, i began to wonder if he might be retarded.

Interesting side note, Dan O'Bannon wrote Darkstar, AND Alien.

If you have seen the DVD on the history of the Alien movies, he said "When you write a comedy, and no one laughs, it hurts. So i figured, if i cant make them laugh, i will scare the hell out of them."

Or something to that effect.


I have heard bad bad things about rawhead rex. Clive BArker was embarrassed that it was his first movie.

Ever see Basket Case? The "brother" looked like a chewed up football.

Arioch 04-22-2004 04:13 AM

Quote:

I remember seeing Daarkstar as a kid. One of my freinds said it was the funniest thing he had seen. After watching it, i began to wonder if he might be retarded.

Interesting side note, Dan O'Bannon wrote Darkstar, AND Alien
HEY DARKSTAR OWNS!!!!!!

Doolittle convinces the bomb not to explode.]
Doolittle: Hello, Bomb? Are you with me?
Bomb #20: Of course.
Doolittle: Are you willing to entertain a few concepts?
Bomb #20: I am always receptive to suggestions.
Doolittle: Fine. Think about this then. How do you know you exist?
Bomb #20: Well, of course I exist.
Doolittle: But how do you know you exist?
Bomb #20: It is intuitively obvious.
Doolittle: Intuition is no proof. What concrete evidence do you have that you exist?
Bomb #20: Hmmmm... well... I think, therefore I am.
Doolittle: That's good. That's very good. But how do you know that anything else exists?
Bomb #20: My sensory apparatus reveals it to me. This is fun.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Pinback wants the bomb to disarm.]
Pinback: All right, bomb. Prepare to receive new orders.
Bomb#20: You are false data.
Pinback: Hmmm?
Bomb #20: Therefore I shall ignore you.
Pinback: Hello... bomb?
Bomb #20: False data can act only as a distraction. Therefore, I shall refuse to perceive.
Pinback: Hey, bomb?
Bomb #20: The only thing that exists is myself.
Pinback: Snap out of it, bomb.
Bomb #20:In the begining there was nothing, only darkness. And then there was me.
Bomb#20: Let there be light.
[EXPLODES]

Fucking classic,

Your right about the painted garbage bag alien tho, LMAO:D

Vodstok 04-22-2004 04:15 AM

Does that bomb strike you as being slightly HAL-ish?


"What are you doing, Dave?"

BudMan 04-22-2004 05:29 AM

Rawhead Rex---good call sleepaway [ by the way, where have you been? ]

I read Rawhead Rex and got all excited when the movie came out, then it sucked. I think Clive Barker wanted nothing to do with it as well.

Vodstok 04-22-2004 05:41 AM

I read an interview with him where he said he was mortified when he saw it.

I believe he referred to the experience as humiliating.


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