Divorce
 

I guess i will be getting a divorce soon,sooner than later. I first was a little relieved and was feeling freedomcoming my way.It just started hitting me all at once that life as my kids and i knew it is over.I have been with him for 8 years and we have 4 kids.I'm wondering if any of you have been through this and if so, when does it start to get easier?What helped you through it and if you have kids, how did you help them throught it?Any advice would help today,i'm feeling pretty low today.:(

Sorry to hear that Pink. I've never been through it but have many friends who have. The best advice I could give is Don't let the lawyers turn it into a complete clusterfuck.

Thanks Newb!Life really sucks!I think i have went through a truck load of tissues today.

try to hurt his wallet as much as possible.

Damn...

Sorry, Mags. Wish I knew what to say...cept for a big bear hug.

I hope you have enough strength to deal with this...its a big change in life.

If things aren't looking otherwise, you might as well go for custody of the kids. That way, he will financially support them and you will have other things to worry about...

i went through it before - but there were no kids so after the initial tough decision (it was something i never wanted to fail at) it wasnt so bad.

kids add a dimension i cant imagine.

you've made a choice that you'd be better off without - rather than with .. so you have to focus on that and keep reminding yourself why.


was it mutual, or a one sided choice - and how old are the kids ?

It was really me who decided this.He never helps me with OUR kids,never helps with bathing,feeding,cleaning up after them,nothing.He goes out drinking and comes in at like 2am and leaves me with all of the kids.When he actually does talk to me,its to cuss me and make me feel like nothing.The cussing has gotten so bad that my little boy is calling me stupid bitch.My kids are 6,4,2,and 7 months.

Punch through a window like Rayne did!

Muscle relaxers and beer help!80)

Obviously I've never benn through a divorce and my parents are still married to each other, but my half brother and sister did (my dad and their mum before I was born). I asked them about it once and they said that, although they were upset, they're happy now because they know their parents are happy and, it may be different in your case, but their were no more arguments etc.

All I can say is that whatever age they are, they'll be upset and there's nothing you can do about that, but make it as smooth for them as you can. Make it clear they can still see their dad (unless they can't) and that things will be better once you all get through the other side.