stupid names
 

i was making chicken salad again today to take for lunch when i looked at the mayonaise and remembered a time when all i would eat was miracle whip.

then i thought about the name "miracle whip"


we take a lot of things for granted because they've been around forever that just wouldnt fly now.

what the fuck possessed someone to name a spread 'miracle whip' ?

i guess at the time someones criteria for a 'miracle' was pretty damn low ... unless Jesus himself made this stuff out of snot and eggs.

I think even jesus would have had a hard time making anything out of snot.

these days, it would get a name like "It's not Mayo!" and would come in 4 flavors whithin 6 months.

I think they were horny. :p

If that was the case, it would be more like "Miracle Flog" or the more accurate "Miracle Goo"

this ties in with that old rant .. the use of the word 'decadent' to describe things as safe and mundane as chocolate chip cookies.

i know there are other rediculous product names but i cant think of any ..mostly because we take them for granted and dont consider them weird until we really think about them.

any product with the word 'miracle' that doesnt raise the dead or feed thousands with very little qualifies ..

i wonder if there are any others.



although all the ones that start with MR. are kind of goofy - they are usually to the point.


that would be another good thread ...


either a thread with all the legitimite MR. ______ products they can think of, or a thread with all the MR. ______ products we could invent ..


like :


Mr. Douche

I've always found the 100 Grand (formerly $100,000 Bar) rather amusing seeing as how it costs $0.75.

What, they thought calling it a million dollar bar was too bold?

Wonder Bread?

yeah,,, good one


the 8 wonders of the world !!!!!


The Great Pyramid of Giza
The Hanging Gardens of Babylon
The Statue of Zeus at Olympia
The Temple of Artemis at Ephesus
The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus
The Colossus of Rhodes
The Lighthouse of Alexandria

and now !!!!

Not in bondage. :p

American Football....You carry the ball 90% of the time. The only time your foot touches it is at kickoff...

For some reason I am frightened by the name of "JIF Peanut Butter." It probably means something, make your meal in a jiffy or something like that, but when I see those three letters I wonder if this peanut butter didn't come from another planet. Jif! Jif!

Same thing for the shortened version of "mathematics"--"math."

Say "math" over and over again while looking at the word "math." It will soon have no meaning to you, just a sound, a weird noise your mouth makes. Try it, it's fun! Well, actually, it's not.