Zombie Apocalypse Training
 

So ever sense i got my sisters old computer in April i have gotten very lazy and gained some weight and i realized that if the zombie apocalypse happened now i would be screwed. So i decided that i am going to start training for the inevitable so i can out run the zombies(or just the other people) so wish me luck on my journey or you can join with me.

Good luck!

I'm kinda workin' on it. Giving up flour is hard but you feel tons better.

I don't need no stinking training! I'm a crack shot with a rifle and I know how to handle an axe and sword.

I will be the old lady behind you!

Lol.

Zombies can be easily avoided. They are not smart due to being brain dead, and they move slow as *beep*. Only a total dimwit can get killed by a zombie.

Outrunning zombies is easy if you surround yourself with the right people. Make friends with types that are generous and incredibly clumsy, when they fall they'll tell you to save yourself. Also for extra insurance, make friends with people slower than you. Having small children on hand also helps.




...I didn't say these were morally sound tips.

::stick out tongue::::big grin::

I think shoving a zombie aside would be easy enough.

I might be an older woman but I can hold my own with zombies.

Remember I am hell in a dress!

Wear tennis shoes not high heels or boots, it just might save your life!

Thanks for the advise. I have a couple of pairs of tennis shoes.

And for a woman of 75 I can still run pretty fast!

I played soccer for 5 years, I know I can avoid a zombie.

Remember.

I am hell in a dress!

No zombie can overtake me.

This is one dress that they don't want to fool with!

I figured you were skilled with that kitchen knife.

Oh yes!

VERY SKILLED!::wink::

were you causing those knife fights outside my house? J/K.

Oh no! Not me!

Hmmmm....

One time I was at a costume party wearing a really big hoopskirt.

When some zombies appeared I was able to get away quick and got some people out of harms way under my skirts.

There was this one time when a zombie walked up to me and tried to bite me, I kicked it in the balls and the fell off. Then the zombie fell over and didn't budge an inch after that. It was the oddest situation I have ever been in.

I felt one pulling on my dress. I turned around kicked him you know where and then give him an uppercut.

He was out cold.

He won't fool with this old broad no more!::wink::

lol

Just because I am a woman, don't think I can't be tough, especially with zombies.

I was just laughing at the part " No one messes with this old broad!".

Well! I am! LOL!

But you would think that these zombies would have respect for a lady, young or old!

Always have an exit in every room. You're in an elevator when the outbreak hits you're finished.

Buy a pet. Cats sense impending disaster.

Speakin' of the big ZA...y'all heard that NASA wantsta bring an asteroid to earth? Or the new face eatin' incident in FL ? To me that's one of the ways the infection begins, space rocks... The in guy FL was eatin' somebody's face off in the driveway...cops used a stun gun and copdog on 'em....and he still wouldn't stop eatin'! Zombie!

You guys are silly, talking about being a crack shot with a riffle. If you're in the center of a ring of zombies, 100 yards thick, all 360 degrees, coming from EVERY direction... you can't run, and fighting is a useless gesture. ::stick out tongue::

You need a good shelter or a helicopter.

I am a hunter! I can go from one tree to another. I prefer fighting with melee weaponry more than ranged weapons.

We have ten cats. I fear nothing.

I almost regurgitated my mushrooms reading this.

We have a big black maine coon cat guarding the house at night. He likes to chase the deer away from the house, he might do the same with zombies. If he doesn't get eaten first that is.