The Joker
 

Are you a practical joker, do you ever play practical jokes to scare the shit out of people?

When I was little I used to cover myself in tomato sauce and lay on the kitchen floor when my mum would work in sometimes sit at the sink with my head in the water as though I had drowned.

Then when I was 20 I became friends with a guy who kept telling me I look like Harold from his favorite movie. So I my 21st at the end of the night he brought Harold and Maude around and we watched it.

So I'm guessing I'm not the only one who likes to freak people out from time to time.

I love throwing fire crackers of the balcony aswell, huhu ha......

no........

Yeah, I've done a few in my time...
I've glued things to things, set things up so they fall apart when people touch them, removed inks from pens (or even better, left the ink in, but removed the tops), I've used fart gas/bombs at colleges, always used to get my arachnophobiac sister with fake spiders in strategic locations, I loved my shock pen, I've made all kinds of cranks to all kinds of people and places (at one point resulting in a "major incident" squad being called out...oops), I've put glue on toilet seats, blown out mailboxes, faked fights, killings, and electrocutions with my friends in public areas, and put stupid shit (nothing dirty, like candy...etc) in peoples food, I also used to pretend to carjack my mother...she'd get home late at night and as soon as she got outta the car, I'd rush/ambush her from a different location, and I also have this thing where sometimes I stand behind a door while someone's inside, waiting patiently until they come out, then stand so damn close and make some stupid noise when the door starts to open, usually works (the girlfriend fucking HATES than one), er...one I've done a few times that's more irritating than paractical joke, something I've done on numerous occasions when drunk...if someone goes into a public restroom, into the booth...either mulekick the door (not the middle...don't want it to open, just make a real loud noise), or throw HUGE wads of wet toiletpaper over the top.
I've convinced people to try habaneros on numerous occasions saying "these are weird...theyre a chilli, but not really hot, more sweet than anything"..gets 'em every time, and I've put chocolate and foodstuffs on peoples faces while they sleep, tobasco in the corner of the eye/mouth works a treat.
...and at school, damn sure I ALWAYS had a peashooter handy.
Yeah, I guess the pranks were/are my thing...yknow, not all the time, but I'd say I'm more prone to messing with people than most. I don't do it to be cruel or anything, but there's nothing better than their reactions to this kinda shit.

Yeah, I do things sometimes....like if I go to the store with a girlfriend, I'll chase her around with Monistat 7 or Vagisil yelling, "Hey, did that infection clear up yet?" or I'll sneak some hot sauce into someone's Coke. Once I talked my little sister into getting into a hole in the yard, and then I put a bucket over her head and sat on it for half an hour. That was when I was younger though.

http://horror.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8067

this is a good old thread on jokes. I am rather proud of mine :)

my ex-father in law pulled off the joke of the century - only funny to those familiar with the movie "Dont Look Now"

is anyone reading this thread familiar with the flick ?

Is it weird that whenever I commit these acts, I hear the nes bomberman tune in my head?

hahahha thats great !! you're a retard !

Yes. i have emotional scars from murderous midgets, old blind women groping themselves, and Donald Sutherland's ass:eek:

ok .. well get this then .. and tell me if it isnt fucking perfection :

1st off .. you have to get a picture of this guy in your head. a slight, dapper grey haired proper british gentleman. soft spoken, admired by everyone he's met as a proper gentleman .. its always the word used to describe him.
(think peter cushing, but not as severe looking.)

he was a plant manager for a major global firm .. started in GB, came to canada, was transfered to Holland, retired in the USA, then came back to Canada. so he talked and acted like an executive .. mild mannered but very professional and nice.


thing is .. he loved horror movies .. we used to go to them together whenever they played and he got a huge kick out of them - the bloodier the better ..
something you'd never see coming a million miles away ..
made him funny and cool to me ..

anyway - this happened while in Holland.
Late one night he, his wife and the 2 girls (my ex-wife and her sister) ended up watching Dont Look Now On TV.

He loved it - it scared the shit out of all the girls.

sometime after everyone went to bed he got an idea..
one of the girls had a small red raincoat..

he puts it on (the hood on his head anyway) grabs a knife from the kitchen .... and goes into my ex's room on his knees .. making sure she hears him going in...

she looks up .. and there at the side of her bed is a midget in a red raincoat holding a knife..

apparently you could hear the screams for miles..


its not so much how clever it was - but the complete and utter suprise - coming from someone who's character is so far removed from pulling a prank like that ..

best one i've ever heard.

:p i was waiting for you to respond to that.

the only people this obsessed with shit are usually the rubber room inmates who sit in it and play with it.

The last time I played a practical joke was about 2 years ago. A guy I know had gotten me to drink a shot of spirits with tobasco sauce in it when I was already quite drunk and not expecting it. So...

I got a shot glass, put 2 teaspoons of a Habanero chilli paste that I have (67% pure habaneros) and filled the rest with gin. It was dark, told hm it was a strawberry in the bottom.

The sclerae of his eyes were glowing red, tears down his face, He told me he was shitting fire the next morning.

Defecating or urinating on objects/people isn't a cute little joke.

It is the most insulting thing you can do. It shows a complete lack of respect for yourself, your friends and/or any object that comes in contact with with your feces and urine.

I am actually quite concerned for you and those around you. This behavior indicates a complete lack of concern for your fellow man and societal constraints. By definition your behavior is psychopathic.

Are you in councelling?

HA! Zing!


But really, get help.

just more mis-aimed bravado bullshit.
do that around most people and you'd end up with your head on a stick.

for some reason i cant get my head around - this guy somehow thinks people here will think it's cool or funny.

every fucking post you ever make involves shitting on something ..
right now it's on us .. bullshit.

save your stories, you wouldnt know the truth if it crawled up your ass and bit your intestines.

that is the worst excuse for a paragrAPH EVER!

LOL...ooooh em the worst person to have around
and yet..em prolly also one of the easiest person to scare the shit out of

Not one of Steve Millers best but it did give us this song.

Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma
Yeeaahh

Come on baby
Lets slip away
You know Im in a hurry
Want to leave right away

Dont make sense
If it aint the real thing
cause nothing but the real thing
Makes my heart sing
Yeeaahh

Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma

Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma ma
Shu ba da du ma ma ma
Yeeaahh

CAN WE GET A BAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!