The lecture, please.

Watching a 2016 presidential debate VS not watching a 2016 presidential debate?

I really enjoyed all three! More than in past debates, they really drew a contrast between the two candidates, both in policy and in personality. That's what you want from debates. The only important thing missing was the other two 50-state national candidates: Jill Stein Green Party and Johnson Libertarian Party. A partisan crime.


Marry and divorce 6 times Vs never marry?

Never marry

A hole in your shoe on a rainy cold day VS turning into a polar bear who translates Spanish to English as a hobby.

I've already had the wet shoe 2 times this week. Not that bad.

Singing group carols at stranger's door - Vs - listening to an unfamiliar group singing a carol to you at your door?

I would enjoy either, but since I love singing I'll go with being a caroler.

Swim like a fish or run like a cheetah?

Run like a cheetah....not big on water.


Clean out the garage or help a friend move?

or help your friend move out of your garage...

Helping friend move is good workout. but i find cleaning a garage fairly interesting wth the discovery and re-organising.

hand gliding with an expert VS bingo

Ugh. Don't wanna do either, but since my daredevil days are over I'll take bingo.

Heavy snowfall vs a powerful thunderstorm

I would have opted for the bingo as well.

Powerful thunderstorm

Candy canes or after 8 dinner mints.

After Eights are the best!

Chocolate Eclair Vs homemade lemon meringue pie?

Assuming this is the kind of pie with an actual lemon filling *under* said meringue, I'd go with that.
I prefer standard lemon tarts, but I'd say this would be close.

Just sawing your whole ear off with a scalpel quite slowly then applying purell to the wound.
or
Smashing your little toe flat with a mallet then removing the remains with a hammer and chisel.

Oops, sorry cheebs, i somehow went into edit on your post. Hope I didnt mess that up.

anyway, I'll be sacrificing the ear!

Listen to music you absolutely abhor for an entire day or wear an entire outfit that is scratchy and uncomfortable all day?

I'll take the song.

Eating a whole bag of marshmallows in one sitting Vs wearing a sign on your forehead that reads, "tell me I suck"

I could probably do the marshmallows.

Gingerbread men or mincemeat tarts

Gingerbread, without a doubt. I kind of love it.


Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning?

I like the peacefulness of Christmas eve...the calm before the storm, lol.

Mulled wine or alcoholic hot chocolate

Holy crap, the chocolate sounds amazing. I'll have two, please!

Scrooge, starring Alastair Sim VS Scrooged, starring Bill Murray?

Can I say both? I think they're both really good film takes on the story. Seeing one again (obviously) I'd probably go Scrooged. It's funny, and Bill still tugs my heartstrings with his ending TV speech.


This month watch It's a Wonderful Life Vs Miracle on 34th Street (1947)?

Miracle on 34th street . O'Hara!

You'll shut your eye out VS Everytime a bell rings an angel gets his wings?

I don't know it, but just has a ring to it...

Picking up a large slug and rolling it around inside your mouth and swallowing any slime, before returning it safely to the ground.

or

Shooting a shotglass full of unknown piss. warm. Smells like tuna in a can.

As much as I enjoy a tall glass of stranger piss, I'll go with the slug. You know, it being the Holidays and all.

Kill time or kill brain cells? Sure, you can do both, but have a go anyway.

Kill time

Going to a movie theatre alone Vs a restaurant?

Movie

See an opera or a broadway show?

it would depend on what the specific show was. I'm not much of a fan of either. I love female singers, but find most operatic female singing irritating, but I enjoy the male tenors... which seems strange to me. I've been to a large budget 'broadway' show (Annie), it was good. But I'd probably go to proven favorite opera, as I've never been to one.

Have dinner with Gandhi Vs dinner with Leonardo DiCaprio

Gandhi for sure! I'd love the chance to pick his brain on so many things... Buddhism being one of my interests, it would be an honor to me.


Your food made by Gordon Ramsay or Julia Child?

Julia Child


Blue eyes or brown eyes

I'm a total sucker for a brown eyed brunette.

70's R&B or 80's metal?

80's metal


Christmas tree: down after boxing day or down a week after new years.(or later)

Tree down before the new year. Definitely.

Hang out with your neighbors or keep to yourself?

Hang out with Neighbors.

Smash a huge Jack-o-lantern Vs share a bottle of champagne?

Smash the jack-o-lantern

Watch an exorcism or be possessed?

watching one would be fascinating, so I'll go with checking out an exorcism.

Get hit square in the face with a big tuna fish swung by a Major League Baseball player or get whacked in the side of the neck with a potato thrown hard from 25 feet away?

The potato. Could be thrown by anyone. I don't need an athlete taking a swing at me with anything.

No more fruit in the world or no more vegetables?

end of fruits. Can't take the tomato and potato away... that's just cruel.

Banned for life from eating beef, or all aquatic food?

Well you'd have to take one of those away.

Beef.
There are foodstuffs akin enough to beef for my liking.
The range of things from the sea, I love eating the vast majority.
Sure, I'd miss the occasional bloody steak...but I'd miss more things the other way.

Shoving an entire slice of bread up your nose in small rolled up, say, pea sized pieces, then snorting until they fired down your throat, then make yourself vomit it up.
or
Having full on habanero (or above) hot-mouth at the highest extent of the effects, starting from the moment you collect it in chopped up form with your bare hands, lasting for the same duration as the bread thing would take. No drinks.

Well, you didn't say it was the scientific definition of veggies, so I was happy to go with the common convention. ::big grin::

Even if we took all technical fruits away, it's still no contest. The giant category of edible veggies I would wildly guess outnumber fruits something like 10-1.

Bread. The pepper would probably be a new kind of discomfort I'd rather not visit.

Watching a new Star Wars TV series with all Ewoks, Vs watching a new Star Trek TV series were ever character is Sulu?

I think I'll take the Sulu Trek. I'm more a fan of Star Trek than Star Wars anyway.

Dead Kennedys vs Black Flag

DK.
I'm not really into either, but I liked more of what I heard from DK.
...and Rollins seems like a fucking pretentious twat...

Smashing your elbow down onto a bench or whatever until it breaks
or
Heel stomping the top of your other foot until IT breaks

My elbow
I am a Pisces, I don't need to risk screwing up my foot.

drinking gasoline
vs
drinking tar

Yuck. Either way I don't think my body is really going to recover, if it survives at all. I guess I'll drink the gasoline and hope that at least some of it will pass through my body. If I drink tar I know that shits not going anywhere.

Have someone you don't like scream the most heinous insults directly into your face from less than in inch away VS enjoying a slice of your favorite cake or pie.