PDA

View Full Version : The Depths of Evil


Jake.Ashworth
02-24-2016, 02:19 PM
Sooooo Im working on a new thing. I just through down a quick intro so that I would have something on paper that I could start building on. Its definitely rough, but I feel good about it, I like the premise and the ideas. Let me know if I should continue to work on this guy or if its to blah... Im of course and as always up to any interpretation or assistance. Thanks guys and gals.

In the Beginning

"And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day."
This is how we have always heard it, this is what you’re supposed to believe. In all of the ruckus and work of creating all of existence, God didn’t realize that when he separated night and day there was something left over.
There was a spot deep in the heart of a large forest, a spot that never saw that light. A spot that even in direct sunlight, is never lit. The location of this place is a mystery, some have seen it, some have even touched it, but no one really knows where it is. It may move, or it may not even exist.
This place has touched the hearts and souls of many. It draws in everything good around it. It doesn’t destroy the good, it doesn’t even corrupt the good parts of a person. It plants a small seed of darkness that, over time, sometimes decades or life times will grow into a dark, deep root. Eventually this will sprout into pure evil. It will overcome all good in a person or thing and it will cause an instance of absolute evil. Sometimes one overwhelming and intense occurrence, sometimes many over the course of time.
This could range from kicking a puppy to ripping out a person’s throat and relishing in the heat of the blood. The darkness makes creatures that stumble into its grasp slowly lose their minds. They attack other animals even if they aren't vicious or carnivorous and eventually tear themselves apart.
This darkness doesn’t grow but it lives, it breaths, it wants. It wants to be more, it wants to touch everything in the world and bring forth the darkness that was in the beginning, before God created all that there is now.
Everyone who has done anything dark, evil, and demented in this world was at some point touched by this darkness. It doesn’t have to be directly, in some cases it dwells inside of a person and is passed on to that persons children and even theirs. The longer it dwells, grows and waits the worse it becomes.
Charles Manson was touched by this darkness through the father he never really knew. His father was a vagrant, he hitch hiked across the country and fucked every woman he could get his hands on. This man lived on the street when he couldn’t find a woman’s bed to sleep in. In one of his journeys he came across a small stoned outcropping in the middle of a forest.
The area was beautiful. Everything was alive and flourishing. The trees where huge, the stones on the side of the gentle hill where covered in a bright green moss. A small stream dribbled by slowly meandering its way through the forest, wrapping around trees and rocks.
He stood and stared for what seemed like hours watching nature slowly pass him by. The sounds of the forest where pure and clean and of absolute perfection. His attention slowly passed between the stream and the tree tops, and before he realized he was even moving, he reached out to touch the moss covered stones.
As soon as his hand touched the slimy moss covered stone, all of the sound halted. He watched a bird flutter by but didn’t hear the beat of his wings. His heart raced, sweat beaded on his forehead and a tremble ran from his toes through his legs, up his back and over his shoulders. This all took about 5 seconds, then everything rushed back. He stepped away from the dark stone outcropping, noticing for the first time how the light seemed to almost bend around it. The sounds of the forest rushed back into his ears and he decided to get as far away from this place as possible.
It was three months later that an attractive young woman picked him up in a bar and took him home to make love. He never thought of that place again, never looked back as they say. But that day the darkness planted itself in him. It didn’t get much time to grow in him because it saw more potential in the embryo inside of that young lady that he planted his seed in. The darkness found a soul to root in, it found Charles Manson.

Jake.Ashworth
02-24-2016, 02:20 PM
It didn't take any of my format, I apologize...

SerialKiller
03-23-2016, 02:10 PM
Please & thank you. ::wink::

Repo'd
03-24-2016, 01:50 AM
Crap, sorry I missed this when u posted! Yeah, Jake, please continue. Thats a perfectly provocative start.

Roiffalo
03-24-2016, 07:37 AM
Beautifully written as always, Jake!

Martha
03-24-2016, 01:02 PM
Looks good Jake! Keep it up!

Jake.Ashworth
03-25-2016, 07:45 AM
AWWWWW!!!!!! Yall are awesome. I don't share with anyone but you guys and its nice to hear some props. Thanks yall.

hammerfan
03-25-2016, 08:39 AM
I finally got a chance to read this. Wow, Jake! This is amazing!

Jake.Ashworth
03-25-2016, 08:44 AM
I finally got a chance to read this. Wow, Jake! This is amazing!

I wouldn't go that far... But I appreciate you going there. Yall inspire me to keep going lol.

I just wish it would have taken the format, it looks sloppy and extra amateur without the appropriate line breaks and whatnot.

hammerfan
03-25-2016, 09:10 AM
I wouldn't go that far... But I appreciate you going there. Yall inspire me to keep going lol.

I just wish it would have taken the format, it looks sloppy and extra amateur without the appropriate line breaks and whatnot.

For me, personally, it's not about format, it's about content. And, the content is excellent.

Jake.Ashworth
03-25-2016, 11:35 AM
Well thank you, I will work on it more soon and post it up here as I do. I just got to figure out how to ration my time.