LDB
12-01-2013, 01:37 AM
All right, so let's get started. ^_^ My name's Tiffany, I'm the owner of FleshDimension.com. I'm a writer who prefers to publish online. Writing isn't a job for me, it's a love. :D So anyway, my new website is supposed to kicked off a new horror anthology I'm working on.
To get started, here is the first seven pages to a new story I've been working on. Please forgive any typos or grammatical errors. Honestly, this is kind of a test run to see how some people react.
Not really looking for critiquing, just kind of hoping someone reads it and enjoy it. :)
Here is a drawing I did of my main character...a synopsis....and other than that, enjoy!
Read it here or at https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3168183/1/Allyson
I don't have it on FleshDimension.com yet.
http://fleshdimension.com/home/?attachment_id=9
SYNOPSIS
Crinkle Paper Company. A small greeting card company months away from closing its doors for good. Struggling to stay afloat, Crinkle Paper rents a cheap office space in an otherwise unused building, located in the dark ghetto of an unnamed city. Allyson, a customer service representative, is staying late one night with her co-worker, Jennifer, to submit some last minute orders for the company.
When Jennifer disappears without a trace, Allyson goes in search. But the void she enters is strange and twisted and inescapable…
ALLYSON
“Thank you for calling Crinkle Paper. This is Allyson. Are you calling today to place an order just in time for the holiday?”
“Err—no. I was-uh-actually calling to cancel an order I placed yesterday. I found a better deal,” the raspy voice said on the other line. He sounded like he was talking through a sponge.
“I’m so sorry to hear we’re losing you’re business. Do you have some time now to discuss some better options for you? I’m sure we can find something better for you,” Allyson said, clicking her mouse in the text field and preparing to type.
“I doubt it. These cards are .50 less than your set. And they’re scented,” the man said.
“Well, why don’t we start off with your name,” Allyson said, ignoring the scented comment.
“Tom Crumble. I got the-uh-Merry Marshmallow Christmas cards.”
“What a great choice! Okay, well now that I have your order up, let’s see what we can do to make this the right choice for you. Now, I see you have the standard straight edge. How about I make those scalloped edges – that’s a dollar extra per card – and expedite shipping to you at no charge. That way, you can get started on sending them out early!”
Ticka ticka ticka. Allyson quickly changed the options on her computer screen.
“Oh, well that’s just fine! Thank you,” Mr. Crumble said, genuinely satisfied.
“Great!” Allyson breathed a mental sigh of relief. That would have been the fifth cancellation today. “Thanks so much for giving us another chance, Mr. Crumble.”
Allyson nearly hit the roof when Sonia rapped on her office door. She looked over her shoulder at her boss, giving her thumbs up. Sonia gave her two thumbs up and grinned. Allyson finished up the call and took her headset off, turning in her swivel chair. Sonia entered, leaning against the doorway.
“Was that a sale?” she asked, a corner of her mouth curling up.
“It sure was.” Allyson left out the parts about saving Mr. Crumble money. Her eyes drifted to the bright red binder Sonia held. On the spine, the word ORDERS was written in black permanent marker. There was a yellow Post-It on the front with a phone number on it.
“So—!” Sonia placed the binder on Allyson’s desk and then clapped her hands together. “I’ve got some extra orders the girls got this morning. I need you and Jennifer to stay late tonight and make sure these get in the system.”
Allyson felt her face twitch, but she maintained her smile. Sonia noticed.
“It shouldn’t take you more than an hour.”
“My pleasure,” Allyson said.
“Thanks. It’ll be slow tonight, I’m sure. So try to do them in between calls. But make sure you finish up Friday’s. We don’t want to fall behind.”
To say Sonia wasn’t a workaholic would have been a lie. She stayed late almost every night, right up to nine o’clock or later after Allyson and Jennifer were long-gone. Today was Sonia’s birthday and she still came in to work, so Allyson didn’t complain. Not that it would have made a difference.
“I already told Jennifer,” Allyson said, straightening up. “That’s my phone number there on the front. Call me if you have any questions. I’m going to get ready to go.”
“All right, no problem.” Allyson locked her computer and grabbed her purse under her desk. It was warm from leaning against the computer tower. “I’ll take my break now then, before you go.”
“Good idea. Thanks, All.” Sonia left the door open and left. Allyson let her smile drop and slumped back in her chair. She regretted not setting her TV that morning to record her show. Now she would miss it.
She fished through her purse for her phone and groaned when she realized it was sitting on her counter at home.
“No!”
She pushed aside her make-up bag, wallet, pack of gum, car keys, pill case…nothing. Disappointed, she stood and stretched her arms toward the ceiling. She smoothed her skirt, fixing her gold leather belt. Then she flicked off the light and closed the door behind her.
Her fuchsia pumps clicked on the glossy beige floor. Allyson’s office was at the end of the hall on the left. Directly next to her office was Jennifer’s. She was about Allyson’s age, blue eyes just like hers, but brunette instead of blonde. Allyson waved at her co-worker through the glass, but Jennifer was on a call and didn’t notice. Her muffled voice came through the door.
Allyson walked to the end of the hall, passing the empty, dark offices. Most people were long gone by this time of day. In an hour, the place would be a dead zone. It was an eerie place at night when the rest of the staff had left. Sonia would turn the lights off in the unused part of the office. She was a stickler for saving on electricity. The worst part was walking out to the parking lot. Usually, Allyson and Jennifer walked through the bleak building together, but on days when one of them was off and the other worked, it was unsettling to say the least.
She passed the emergency stairwell and rounded the corner. At the end of the hall, Allyson could see snow coming down hard outside. Ice had formed around the edges. Just looking at it made her shiver. The snow hadn’t let up since that afternoon. Allyson prayed it ceased even a little by the time she and Jennifer got out.
She went into the brightly lit break room. She set her purse on the table and opened the refrigerator door, grabbing her can of Diet Coke and left over fettuccine in Tupperware. Allyson put the pasta in the microwave for ninety seconds and sat down, opening her Coke. The lights flickered a few times as Allyson touched the cold can to her lips. She froze, waiting until it stopped.
In the center of the table was what was left of Sonia’s pink frosted birthday cake. The staff sang Happy Birthday To You earlier. Allyson bought her a thermos that said Just Dot It Later.
The microwave beeped when it was finished. Allyson sat down with her warm leftovers. She could see straight into Sonia’s office. Normally, her blinds were drawn, but not today. Sonia was turning off her computer. Her purse and tote bag were propped up on her desk, and she had her coat on.
A few minutes into Allyson’s break, Sonia turned off the lights, locked her office, and turned off the lights to the hall and conference room on the way to the break room.
“I’ll be finishing this off tonight,” Sonia said, bobbing her eyebrows as she picked up her cake in the plastic container and set it carefully in her tote. Allyson faked a laugh.
“Have a good night,” Sonia said. “Drive safely.”
“You too. Happy birthday!”
Sonia waved and strode through the dark office to the glass doors at the front. Allyson wished it was she who was leaving, watching Sonia lock the doors, take a few steps, and open the red door leading into the large corridor, which she would follow to the parking lot. Allyson sat alone for the rest of her break, slowly sipping her soda.
Allyson kicked her pumps off and massaged one foot with the other. Dampness has accumulated between her toes. She could almost see her turquoise nail polish through her black hose.
Next time, I’ll do gold.
Another ten minutes and she would be out of here. It was already a quarter to eleven, the latest she had ever stayed. Sonia was full of crap when she said Allyson and Jennifer could knock those orders out in an hour. In the office next door, Allyson heard Jennifer was typing away on her keyboard. Suddenly, she stopped and gave a loud, exhausted yawn. Her chair squeaked and then the sound of Jennifer’s bare feet softly padding into Allyson’s office.
To get started, here is the first seven pages to a new story I've been working on. Please forgive any typos or grammatical errors. Honestly, this is kind of a test run to see how some people react.
Not really looking for critiquing, just kind of hoping someone reads it and enjoy it. :)
Here is a drawing I did of my main character...a synopsis....and other than that, enjoy!
Read it here or at https://www.fictionpress.com/s/3168183/1/Allyson
I don't have it on FleshDimension.com yet.
http://fleshdimension.com/home/?attachment_id=9
SYNOPSIS
Crinkle Paper Company. A small greeting card company months away from closing its doors for good. Struggling to stay afloat, Crinkle Paper rents a cheap office space in an otherwise unused building, located in the dark ghetto of an unnamed city. Allyson, a customer service representative, is staying late one night with her co-worker, Jennifer, to submit some last minute orders for the company.
When Jennifer disappears without a trace, Allyson goes in search. But the void she enters is strange and twisted and inescapable…
ALLYSON
“Thank you for calling Crinkle Paper. This is Allyson. Are you calling today to place an order just in time for the holiday?”
“Err—no. I was-uh-actually calling to cancel an order I placed yesterday. I found a better deal,” the raspy voice said on the other line. He sounded like he was talking through a sponge.
“I’m so sorry to hear we’re losing you’re business. Do you have some time now to discuss some better options for you? I’m sure we can find something better for you,” Allyson said, clicking her mouse in the text field and preparing to type.
“I doubt it. These cards are .50 less than your set. And they’re scented,” the man said.
“Well, why don’t we start off with your name,” Allyson said, ignoring the scented comment.
“Tom Crumble. I got the-uh-Merry Marshmallow Christmas cards.”
“What a great choice! Okay, well now that I have your order up, let’s see what we can do to make this the right choice for you. Now, I see you have the standard straight edge. How about I make those scalloped edges – that’s a dollar extra per card – and expedite shipping to you at no charge. That way, you can get started on sending them out early!”
Ticka ticka ticka. Allyson quickly changed the options on her computer screen.
“Oh, well that’s just fine! Thank you,” Mr. Crumble said, genuinely satisfied.
“Great!” Allyson breathed a mental sigh of relief. That would have been the fifth cancellation today. “Thanks so much for giving us another chance, Mr. Crumble.”
Allyson nearly hit the roof when Sonia rapped on her office door. She looked over her shoulder at her boss, giving her thumbs up. Sonia gave her two thumbs up and grinned. Allyson finished up the call and took her headset off, turning in her swivel chair. Sonia entered, leaning against the doorway.
“Was that a sale?” she asked, a corner of her mouth curling up.
“It sure was.” Allyson left out the parts about saving Mr. Crumble money. Her eyes drifted to the bright red binder Sonia held. On the spine, the word ORDERS was written in black permanent marker. There was a yellow Post-It on the front with a phone number on it.
“So—!” Sonia placed the binder on Allyson’s desk and then clapped her hands together. “I’ve got some extra orders the girls got this morning. I need you and Jennifer to stay late tonight and make sure these get in the system.”
Allyson felt her face twitch, but she maintained her smile. Sonia noticed.
“It shouldn’t take you more than an hour.”
“My pleasure,” Allyson said.
“Thanks. It’ll be slow tonight, I’m sure. So try to do them in between calls. But make sure you finish up Friday’s. We don’t want to fall behind.”
To say Sonia wasn’t a workaholic would have been a lie. She stayed late almost every night, right up to nine o’clock or later after Allyson and Jennifer were long-gone. Today was Sonia’s birthday and she still came in to work, so Allyson didn’t complain. Not that it would have made a difference.
“I already told Jennifer,” Allyson said, straightening up. “That’s my phone number there on the front. Call me if you have any questions. I’m going to get ready to go.”
“All right, no problem.” Allyson locked her computer and grabbed her purse under her desk. It was warm from leaning against the computer tower. “I’ll take my break now then, before you go.”
“Good idea. Thanks, All.” Sonia left the door open and left. Allyson let her smile drop and slumped back in her chair. She regretted not setting her TV that morning to record her show. Now she would miss it.
She fished through her purse for her phone and groaned when she realized it was sitting on her counter at home.
“No!”
She pushed aside her make-up bag, wallet, pack of gum, car keys, pill case…nothing. Disappointed, she stood and stretched her arms toward the ceiling. She smoothed her skirt, fixing her gold leather belt. Then she flicked off the light and closed the door behind her.
Her fuchsia pumps clicked on the glossy beige floor. Allyson’s office was at the end of the hall on the left. Directly next to her office was Jennifer’s. She was about Allyson’s age, blue eyes just like hers, but brunette instead of blonde. Allyson waved at her co-worker through the glass, but Jennifer was on a call and didn’t notice. Her muffled voice came through the door.
Allyson walked to the end of the hall, passing the empty, dark offices. Most people were long gone by this time of day. In an hour, the place would be a dead zone. It was an eerie place at night when the rest of the staff had left. Sonia would turn the lights off in the unused part of the office. She was a stickler for saving on electricity. The worst part was walking out to the parking lot. Usually, Allyson and Jennifer walked through the bleak building together, but on days when one of them was off and the other worked, it was unsettling to say the least.
She passed the emergency stairwell and rounded the corner. At the end of the hall, Allyson could see snow coming down hard outside. Ice had formed around the edges. Just looking at it made her shiver. The snow hadn’t let up since that afternoon. Allyson prayed it ceased even a little by the time she and Jennifer got out.
She went into the brightly lit break room. She set her purse on the table and opened the refrigerator door, grabbing her can of Diet Coke and left over fettuccine in Tupperware. Allyson put the pasta in the microwave for ninety seconds and sat down, opening her Coke. The lights flickered a few times as Allyson touched the cold can to her lips. She froze, waiting until it stopped.
In the center of the table was what was left of Sonia’s pink frosted birthday cake. The staff sang Happy Birthday To You earlier. Allyson bought her a thermos that said Just Dot It Later.
The microwave beeped when it was finished. Allyson sat down with her warm leftovers. She could see straight into Sonia’s office. Normally, her blinds were drawn, but not today. Sonia was turning off her computer. Her purse and tote bag were propped up on her desk, and she had her coat on.
A few minutes into Allyson’s break, Sonia turned off the lights, locked her office, and turned off the lights to the hall and conference room on the way to the break room.
“I’ll be finishing this off tonight,” Sonia said, bobbing her eyebrows as she picked up her cake in the plastic container and set it carefully in her tote. Allyson faked a laugh.
“Have a good night,” Sonia said. “Drive safely.”
“You too. Happy birthday!”
Sonia waved and strode through the dark office to the glass doors at the front. Allyson wished it was she who was leaving, watching Sonia lock the doors, take a few steps, and open the red door leading into the large corridor, which she would follow to the parking lot. Allyson sat alone for the rest of her break, slowly sipping her soda.
Allyson kicked her pumps off and massaged one foot with the other. Dampness has accumulated between her toes. She could almost see her turquoise nail polish through her black hose.
Next time, I’ll do gold.
Another ten minutes and she would be out of here. It was already a quarter to eleven, the latest she had ever stayed. Sonia was full of crap when she said Allyson and Jennifer could knock those orders out in an hour. In the office next door, Allyson heard Jennifer was typing away on her keyboard. Suddenly, she stopped and gave a loud, exhausted yawn. Her chair squeaked and then the sound of Jennifer’s bare feet softly padding into Allyson’s office.