HDC The Movie III : The one with a new director

[ferretchucker]

Okay, I loved MM's two films, and although i know this wont have as many views or supporters (or be as good) I just hope you lot pay some attention to it.

Is there anybody who wants to be in it?

[Kemal]

I would, but I got my head bashed in during the first one.

[Dante'sInferno]

I wouldnt mind coming back.But i'm zombified.

[novakru]

I'm way dead:)

[crabapple]

This had better be freakin' GOOD

Do you understand me???????????????????????

You make good! I tell you now!

:mad: :mad:

:rolleyes:
;)

[Zero]

you'll need to talk to my agent - but my shooting schedule will be very very tight.

also, i'll need to get a small part for lindsay lohan - - - don't ask, just do it.

[crabapple]

Monkey wants to share a trailer with Lindsay Lohan.

[Freak]

I'll be in it but I'm a zombie now.

[massacre man]

You could make it about Murderdoll and call it "HDC 3: Season of the Bitch"!

I'm just kidding Murderdoll, you know I love you.

[neverending]

I'll be in it, as long as I'm played by Roberts Blossom again,

[Zero]

i'm willing to share a trailer with lohan (out of respect for the braindead) but its going to have to be fumigated on a daily basis. . . even monkeys have their limits!

[Despare]

As good as the other two are another person having some fun with it will be great. Make sure to run it through spellcheck first. ;)

[massacre man]

i'm willing to share a trailer with lohan (out of respect for the braindead) but its going to have to be fumigated on a daily basis. . . even monkeys have their limits!

OH! He went there!

[Doc Faustus]

I'd write it. I also agree to most of Zero's potential demands. Monkeyproofing the Louvre will be hard, though.

[crabapple]

i'm willing to share a trailer with lohan (out of respect for the braindead) but its going to have to be fumigated on a daily basis. . . even monkeys have their limits!

Uh, this one went over my head. What is this all about, now?

[massacre man]

Uh, this one went over my head. What is this all about, now?

What part of "don't ask, just do" don't you understand?

[VampiricClown]

...........................

[Doc Faustus]

EXT: A parking lot littered with monkey parts. Massacre Man is walking away, toting a dripping ax over his shoulder. As Massacre Man walks off, Zero's disembodied head looks up, confused. It rolls around on the ground until a skeletal hand lifts it up.
Zero:AHHH! I'm out of Monkey Hell!
Camera pans out revealing that the hand belongs to a mysterious figure in dark robes.
Mysterious Figure: I took you from Monkey Hell for a reason.
Zero: But Monkey Hell is great!
Mysterious Figure: Look, I'm sorry, but this was really important.
Zero: It'd better be!
Mysterious Figure: The time has come for you to return and wreak havoc.
Zero: Wasn't I just wreaking havoc a minute ago?
Mysterious Figure: Yes. Because you are the chosen...the emissary of chaos...
Zero: That sounds even better than Monkey Hell!
Mysterious Figure: Just wait...
The figure sets down Zero's head on the ground and Zero's body reassembles.
Mysterious Figure: Excellent...it's all going according to plan.
INT: A med school classroom. Ferretchucker is presenting a hideous creature, half ferret, half pig to his classmates and professor.
ferretchucker: So, you see, by combining a pig and a ferret, we can solve all of society's problems.
ferretchucker's professor shakes his head in disapproval.
Professor:I don't see how. And this was clearly done with a staplegun. This isn't even a proper crazy genetic experiment.
ferretchucker: How dare you challenge me! Does your outmoded "God" tell you it's wrong to take his place?
Professor: No, your project is just lazy. You can't just staple animals to each other and call it a cure for all of society's woes!
ferretchucker: I'll show you! I'll show you all! Ha ha ha ha ha!
ferretchucker exits with his bizarre creation.
Professor: Whatever.
Opening credits roll

[ferretchucker]

Okay, here goes. A short first seen. BTW. This is MY FILM! Anyone who want;s to write ***Cough*** Faustus, can wait for the 4th film.

A small run down building is shown in the middle of nowhere. The camera zooms in to show some movement under a few pieces of broken wood. The wood moves to reveal a ferret eating a severed monkey ear. A large, red monkey foot is shown stomping on the ferret.

Zero : "That's mine bitch."

Cut to a house in the city where Mothman is watching television. Show the television screen.

__V__ : So really defeating the zombies was more a case of knowing their weaknesses, in this case their book.

Interviewer : Well, it's been six months since the "Zombie-Mania" and you seem fine. Was, was it hard getting over this ordeal?

__V__ : Not really. I mean, Shit - Oh shit I said shit at three o'clock. Sorry kids.

Interviewer : Well, lets hope that's the last we'll here of them. On to the weath-

Mothman clicks the television off. He smiles as he picks up an old book.

Mothman : Honey, have you made my Cheese and leek Soup?!

A deadified Mona_Lisa shuffles out of the kitchen holding a bowl of soup.

Mothman : That's my girl. I think old __V__ will finally have that triumphant smile ripped off his face come tommorow...

[newb]

Off to a great start.





Doc

[ferretchucker]

Now now, there's no need for that.

Next scene up in a min.

[ferretchucker]

Hmmm...Maybe, mine a faustaus' scenes could both work in this. Yes...yes...

Here comes the re-vamped first scene.


EXT: A parking lot littered with monkey parts. Massacre Man is walking away, toting a dripping ax over his shoulder. As Massacre Man walks off, Zero's disembodied head looks up, confused. It rolls around on the ground until a skeletal hand lifts it up.
Zero:AHHH! I'm out of Monkey Hell!
Camera pans out revealing that the hand belongs to a mysterious figure in dark robes.
Mysterious Figure: I took you from Monkey Hell for a reason.
Zero: But Monkey Hell is great!
Mysterious Figure: Look, I'm sorry, but this was really important.
Zero: It'd better be!
Mysterious Figure: The time has come for you to return and wreak havoc.
Zero: Wasn't I just wreaking havoc a minute ago?
Mysterious Figure: Yes. Because you are the chosen...the emissary of chaos...
Zero: That sounds even better than Monkey Hell!
Mysterious Figure: Just wait...
The figure sets down Zero's head on the ground and Zero's body reassembles.
Mysterious Figure: Excellent...it's all going according to plan.
A small run down building is shown in the middle of nowhere. The camera zooms in to show some movement under a few pieces of broken wood. The wood moves to reveal a ferret eating a severed monkey ear. A large, red monkey foot is shown stomping on the ferret.

Zero : "That's mine bitch."

Cut to a house in the city where Mothman is watching television. Show the television screen.

__V__ : So really defeating the zombies was more a case of knowing their weaknesses, in this case their book.

Interviewer : Well, it's been six months since the "Zombie-Mania" and you seem fine. Was, was it hard getting over this ordeal?

__V__ : Not really. I mean, Shit - Oh shit I said shit at three o'clock. Sorry kids.

Interviewer : Well, lets hope that's the last we'll here of them. On to the weath-

Mothman clicks the television off. He smiles as he picks up an old book.

Mothman : Honey, have you made my Cheese and leek Soup?!

A deadified Mona_Lisa shuffles out of the kitchen holding a bowl of soup.

Mothman : That's my girl. I think old __V__ will finally have that triumphant smile ripped off his face come tommorow...

INT: A med school classroom. Ferretchucker is presenting a hideous creature, half ferret, half pig to his classmates and professor.
ferretchucker: So, you see, by combining a pig and a ferret, we can solve all of society's problems.
ferretchucker's professor shakes his head in disapproval.
Professor:I don't see how. And this was clearly done with a staplegun. This isn't even a proper crazy genetic experiment.
ferretchucker: How dare you challenge me! Does your outmoded "God" tell you it's wrong to take his place?
Professor: No, your project is just lazy. You can't just staple animals to each other and call it a cure for all of society's woes!
ferretchucker: I'll show you! I'll show you all! Ha ha ha ha ha!
ferretchucker exits with his bizarre creation.
Professor: Whatever.
Opening credits roll

[ferretchucker]

Part 2

A small house in the suburbs with a bit of a run down garden is shown, with ferretchucker running into it.

Ferretchucker: Mum! They didn't like my ferrig! Wait 'til the guys on the internet here about this! Mum?

The figure turns around to reveal zero on stilts in a dress and a wig.

Zero: Hey kiddie. Mamma's got a surprise for you! I'm making waffles!

Zero shoves a waffle iron into ferretchuckers horrified face. He drops the ferrig on the floor and it runs away.

Zero: Okay then buddy. What next? I here Chicago can be pretty ni-

Cloaked figure: Silence! There are still many more obstacles to overcome. First, remove this childs head from the waffle maker thing.

Zero peels ferrets lifeless face off the scolding hot waffle iron.

Zero: Oooh, couldn't you just play tic tac toe on that face?

He points at the blank face with horrible criss cross burn marks covering it.

Cloaked Figure: Bite him.

Zero. My Pleasure CF. Have you got any maple syrup?

Zero bites the neck of Ferretchucker. Instantly a change takes place. Ferretchucker's hair falls out, his skin becomes a much paler colour (Save the burn marks) And his eyes become a glowing red. Also he has the typical fangs and pointy toungue.

Ferretchucker: Now I can have my revenge on society! Now I can have revenge on my class mates. Now I can have revenge on my teacher. Vampiric clown watch out! The ferretchucker's about!

Zero hits ferret over the hack of the head with a frying pan.

Zero: Shut the fuck up! We aint in a comic book. You don't need to make stupid speeches and you are NOT called Ferretchucker. I'm gonna call you...Waffleface.

CF: Silence both of you. I sence a presence. Someone watching us...

In a house across the street, OMCdave takes off the binoculars.

OMCdave: Let's see what's happening next door in Mrs. Blankenships house...

Trippin_the_rif: My turn!

Neverending enters the room with a shot gun and blasts their heads off.

Neverending: Bloody wankers!

[neverending]

Oh now, that's totally out of character for my character. I wouldn't be shooting anyone in the face. I'm the crazy old man who comes in after the shooting and glares at everyone and starts ranting about "Oh you have no idea the forces you've unleashed here..."

[ferretchucker]

new director. Theres always some break of character.

[massacre man]

Oh now, that's totally out of character for my character. I wouldn't be shooting anyone in the face. I'm the crazy old man who comes in after the shooting and glares at everyone and starts ranting about "Oh you have no idea the forces you've unleashed here..."

Or "There's (Some sort of killer/evil force) in these here (your location at the moment with an "S" at the end"

Example: There's pissed-off nazi ghosts in these here houses?

[neverending]

Well, I think Mr. Blossom and I are holding out for more money then.

[_____V_____]

Me no likey this Uwe-Boll-ish turn in this sequel!:mad:

Everytime they change the crew for the 3rd part...it sucks.

O well...:rolleyes:

[ferretchucker]

why must you hurt me in this way?

Part 3

Back in __V__'s apartment. __V__ is typing on his computer to "The Guys"

__V__: Well, this is all a good idea but do you really think Thriller.Com needs another fan-movie? These guys are idiots.

A knock on the door. __V__ answers to find Massacre Man standing there with plenty of blood on his shirt.

Massacre Man: Bad news! Look outside!

The camera shoots to the window in a fashion fitting a computer game to reveal people running around in the city, screaming, trying to escape the horde of deadites.

__V__: Oh my god. How did this happen?!

Massacre Man: Some kid up there decided it was time for a sequel...

__V__: What?

Massacre Man: What?

__V__ looks at Massacre Man in a strange way.

Massacre Man: Well. i was just watching TV and drinking some Bud when my house was stormed by Zero, some kid who seemed to think he was terrifying and kept mentioning Ferrets and a cloaked dude. Well, I managed to convince the kid that he could be incharge. He bought it and decided to try and kill them. Well, he threw and axe at mr. cloak but zero made short work of the kid. Poor deluded guy. I could see right through his head. But anyway, in the confusion i managed to run away. Then the first place I thought of coming to was here.

Some screaming noises can be faintly heard but __V__ and Massacre Man appear to have not heard them

__V__: But how could these guys be alive. I destroyed the book and anyway, didnt horrorobsessed mention some kid with a Ferret last time?

Massacre Man: I dunno. His dad probably had a car.

__V__: Hearing Noises What's That?

Suddenly a deadite bursts through the door, knocking the two guys over.

Massacre Man: What the fu-?

Another deadite storms into the room. Massacre Man recognises this one as

Massacre Man: Posher?

The posher deadite lunges at him with great speed. Pushing him back on the floor. MM reaches for a piece of broken vase (It was knocked over earlier in the struggle.

TO BE CONTINUED...

[massacre man]

I didn't say "fuck" once in that. And I never met Posher in the script. ;)

[ferretchucker]

I didn't say "fuck" once in that. And I never met Posher in the script. ;)

Ah, but you had seen photos of him and heard of him...biatch.

[ferretchucker]

Part 3b.

) The piece of broken vase slips out of his hand as posher struggles even more.

Massacre Man: Fuck Punches Off! Punches

He once again move his hand around, this time clasping a bigger piece of the vase. He brings it quickly up into poshers throat. Poshers body writhes for a while, then goes still.

Massacre Man: __V__, where are you?!

He looks around, then hears some muffled fighting in the bedroom. He kicks open the door to see __V__ hitting the deadite over the head with an alarm clock until it stops moving.

__V__: Well, we'd better get out of here. I feel I've played the hero too much. How about Istanbul?

Massacre Man: You can go where ever you like, the fuckers will follow you. Any minute now Zero will have picked up your scent.

__V__: So what happened again-

The motionless deadite srings up from the ground, and in a flash, both he and __V__ have smashed through the 31st floor window. Massacre Man runs to the now smashed window just in time to see __V__ fall through the roof of a mini-van. A swarm of the Deadites push past each other to get into the now, corpse carrying Van.

Massacre Man: What? That can't happen! THAT CANT HAPPEN!

Massacre Man is silenced when two, red furry hands grab him by the neck and pull him out of the window. Zero is holding him above the drop him his hair, whilst he hangs from a little flower pot ledge.

Zero: You gots some 'splainin' to dooo!

Massacre Man: Just try it! Try it! Go on! You know i'll get you in the end. And your mum!

Zero smiles maliciously as he pulls the protagonist up higher. He sinks his teeth into Massacre's neck. Grey blood oozes out. MM screams in pain but still refuses to beg. Zero throws his body onto a nearby roof, then climbs into the apartment.

Zero: Let the games begin...

[Thomasgeorge]

can i plz plz plz

[ferretchucker]

I'll post the next bit tonight. (My tonight, GMT) I think I shall bring in another old star. And maybe some new ones.

[ferretchucker]

here we go!

Cut to a lon white hallway. Camera zooms down to a door at the end with the face of horrorobsessed pressed to a grill.

Horrorobsessed: LET ME OUT! I'M SANE! THEY'RE COMING! THEY'RE COMING BACK!

A Man in a white coat runs to the door.

Doctor Thomasgeorge: Look, your medication is on it's way. We're short staffed, we went through this and if you'll justcalm down-

Horrorobsessed: You just don't fucking get it do you. Listen to me or you'll need the bloody medication. THEY ARE BACK!

She Spits in his face.

TG: Here. Look at this little guy. We found him in Doctor Macabre's room. Little guy came in through a window.

He hands her a photo of a red monkey sitting on a swive chair.

horrorobsessed: LET ME OUT NOW! LET ME OUT! HE'S BACK! HE WANTS TO GET ME! LET ME OUT YOU STUPID BASATRD.

TG smiles patronisingly but before he can do anything else Zero has run up behind him, grabbed his head and is smashing it against the door.

Horrorobsessed: Fu-fu-fu-

Zero: Funny?

He smiles sadistically and bites TG's neck. Blood pours from it. Within a few seconds, he is up again and unlocking the door.

Horrorobsessed: NO! HELP ME! SOMEBODY HELP!

Zero pushes the door open and begins walking towards her, slowly.

Horrorobsessed: GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE! YOU'RE NOT REAL! I WAS WRONG! THIS IS A DREAM!

As Zero is within inches, the deadite TG pushes him out of the way angrily and tries to get a bite himself. While Zero is dstracted, Horrorobsessed runs out of the room and into the hallway. Zero lays into the Deadite TG then follows Horrorobsessed.

Horrorobsessed: HELP ME! SOMEBODY HELP ME!

Presumably nobody takes her seriously because they just laugh. She can't see any doctors and runs up to the roof. Zero follows.

Zero opens the roof door but cannot see anybody. Suddenly, he finds a rope around his leg and is lifted by a crane above the 8 floor drop.

Horrorobsessed: ZERO!

Zero puts his hands up to his face and doesn't speak.

Horrorobsessed: I just have to be sure...

She walks towards him and reaches for his face. Just as she realizes what she's doing, zero has grabbed her and tere is a strggle. She pushes him off the ledge but he grabs her and pulls her done too. Next thing she knows, she has a knife in her back and Zero is holding the ledge. She kisses his lips. He puts out his tounge and she pulls away, gagging.

Horrorobsessed: See you in hell.

He lets her drop. She falls into the trees and Zero pulls himself back up. At the bottom, her body twtches, then gets up.[/.I]

Horrorobsessed: Fuck me that hurt!

[I]She gets up and limps away.

Next part up tommorow.

[horrorobsessed]

hmmm...........

i think i've seen this movie before.











please tell me Busta Rhymes isn't in this one.

[massacre man]

This seems very Epic Movie-ish... :(

[Dante'sInferno]

Um......weak.

[ferretchucker]

i had no ideas and that was on tele. oh well.

next segment up now.

On top of the roof, massacre man regains wakes up.

Massacre Man: Fuck this. I'm goin' to my cabin. Maybe finish Harry potter. I can't wait for hermiones topless scene!

He gets up, holding his side, then limps away.

Meanwhile, in the woods, horrorobsessed is running away as fast as she can.

Horrorobsessed: Why...does...this...shit..always...happen...to me?!

Some rustling can be heard in the distance. She stops still for a second. Suddenly, out of a bush, ferretchucker appears, grabbing her leg.

Horrorobsessed: Get the fuck off me!

She kicks him in the face. He stops moving, Then she notices the machette in his hands.

Horrorobsessed: Finally! These fucking deadites wont know what hit 'em!

She tries to take the macheete, but ferretchucker's hands have a tight grip so instead, she picks up him. She walks on into the trees.

horrorobsessed: I think this is where massacre man one tried to seduce - I'm talking to myself. Oh crap, i feel like I'm commentating for some viewer/listener/reader.

She arrives at a small wooden hut. There's a murky swamp next to it that could easily have an alligator in it. There appears to be a candle on in one of the rooms. She knocks on the door.

Horrorobsessed: Hello!

No Answer.

Horrorobsessed: Massacre Man! It's me, Horrorobsessed! Let me in!

The door earily swings open.

Horrorobsessed: Thanks...

She steps inside, dragging ferretchuckers body. He hits his head on every step up to the inside. She drops the body and decides now is a good time. She walks into the kitchen, gets a knife and uses it to hack off his hand. after she is finished and he is moaning slightly, she takes the machette and decides to go to the room with a candle.

Horrorobsessed: Hello? Who's there? Jesus? Is that you.

She's a figure in a cloak with the hood down. She recognises the face as that of vampiricclown. he appears to still be breathing...slowly. She then looks across at the armchair and sitting in it is no other than...MOTHMAN!

Horrorobsessed: YOU! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LIT THE CANDLE!

Mothman: And...

Horrorobsessed: And broke into the cabin?

Mothman: And...

Horrorobsessed: Realeased the deadites!

Mothman: BINGO! Yes, I did it.

Horrorobsessed: To get revenge on __V__ for taking your spot on television! For massacre man stealing your girlfriend and for me...for me sleeping with your father and breaking up your family.

Mothman: Wrong! I did it for fun! Ever had really long nights? ever got bored of monopoly and cluedo? Ever found some book with things to raise the dead? Ever wanted a zombie wife who never complains no matter what you do to her?

At that precise moment, massacre man bursts in through the door, holding a newly bought copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows whilst unzipping his trousers.

Massacre Man: What the fuck are you to doing here?

Mothman: Just in time! SICK 'EM BOYS!

Outside, some movement and rustling can be heard drawing closer. Grunting and shouting. Then, all of a sudden, the cabin is surrounded by Deadites, and the two only characters who have played a main part in this and the last one and survived until this moment are surrounded. Just then, the ceiling breaks and the noise of a helicopter can be heard. Somebody in black clothing lowers themselves into the cabin. They take off their mask.

Horrorobsessed: BLOODRAYNE!

To be continued...

[illdojo]

Um......weak.

Ditto.....

[newb]

http://www.wipublib.org/jimages/Jbaby_boy_sleeping.gif

...............................................

[illdojo]

http://www.wipublib.org/jimages/Jbaby_boy_sleeping.gif

...............................................

I am so stealing that gif.....Bravo Newb Bravo. :D

[XtRaVa]

Give him a break, hes around 13 years old. Most people of that age these days cant even speak properly, let alone attempt to write movie scripts. :rolleyes:

[ferretchucker]

Thanks. Plus, of course it wont be as good as the other one, nearly everybody in this forum is dead and also, this is the one with a new director. Look at jurassic park 3! LOOK AT IT!

[newb]

Give him a break, hes around 13 years old. Most people of that age these days cant even speak properly, let alone attempt to write movie scripts. :rolleyes:

Too bad......we don't coddle anybody here.Especially aspiring movie directors....we don't need another Uwe Boll churning out shit movies.


:D

[bloodrayne]

Too bad......we don't coddle anybody here.Especially aspiring movie directors....we don't need another Uwe Boll churning out shit movies.


:DThink of it this way...When little Uwe drew a scribble and called it a dinosaur, his mommy probably said "That is EXCELLENT...It's the best dinosaur I've EVER seen"...

So Uve said, "Well, it HAS to be because I used the MOST expensive paper, it's the same kind of paper that well-known artists use, AND the best markers that you can find anywhere...These exact same markers were used by Jerry when we were on the school bus, and everyone said that his picture of a cat was the most awesomest cat EVER!"

And everything he did in his life, no matter what it was or how bad, his mommy always told him it was the best, and that no one could do better...All the way back to his first memory of "Aww, that is such a good poopy you made...I'm so proud of my big boy"

So...How would he even KNOW, and how could he possibly BELIEVE, that he's still cranking out shit?

It's called 'constructive criticism'...It's a necessary evil...

If you make someone believe that something bad is good, they will have absolutely NO reason to change it, work on it, and make it better until it really IS good...

This insight comes from raising kids...I'm always completely honest with them in my praise or criticism, and even help them to find ways to improve something when necessary.....Otherwise, even though Seri is now 18, we might still be eating her rock hard brownies and salty cookies...haha

[ferretchucker]

well, i like it...

[XtRaVa]

I'm fine with constructive criticism, but it wasnt constructive criticism...at all.

"Off to a great start.............................Doc" - How is it constructive to immediately say that the first part written by someone else was good, but the first part written by the person who wanted to be the writer isnt.

"It sucks" - How is that constructive?

"Um.....weak" followed by "Ditto" - How is that constructive? It's just flaming.

Finally a picture of someone asleep insinuating its really boring, which is then bravo'ed. Thats not constructive. At all.

How about instead of just flaming, or saying how much you dont like it, you offer actual constructive criticism.

If this was just another random annoying new member who was just posting some incoherent pile of wank, then yes, flame away (I'd be the first to if I could), but when its a 13 year old trying to write fiction, who is a regular on the forum and all he gets is stupid comments its just out of order.

I doubt any of you will agree with me (no doubt you'll say things like "we were just joking" and "lighten up") and I'll probably just get flamed back, but I'm an adult. Ganging up on a kid is different. Bad form.

[bloodrayne]

well, i like it...Oh, I honestly haven't had time to read the entire thing, so I can't form an opinion...I was just explaining the 'critiquing' thing :)

[bloodrayne]

"Off to a great start.............................Doc" -
no doubt you'll say things like "we were just joking" I could pretty much bet you that at least THAT part was a joke...Newb's our resident Jester

Of course...I could be wrong

[massacre man]

Honestly then, the only thing that's bugging me about it was the Halloween Resurrection scene and Zero talking, other than that it's readable.

[crabapple]

Fertt: Y0ou schould make SCARY. I want a cold shi ver of fear when I read you script! Make good scary now, you have the powah. Bring all monkeys, they frighten many much...theyjump up and down,. make oook noises, them have scary long tails. Is frightening animal,

[XtRaVa]

I could pretty much bet you that at least THAT part was a joke...Newb's our resident Jester


Oh theres no question that most of it was done in a joking way, I'm just saying that its not all that funny to gang-flame. Do that a couple of times, sure...but then start with some actual constructive criticism. :cool:

[bloodrayne]

Fertt: Y0ou schould make SCARY. I want a cold shi ver of fear when I read you script! Make good scary now, you have the powah. Bring all monkeys, they frighten many much...theyjump up and down,. make oook noises, them have scary long tails. Is frightening animal,
Uwe?...OMG, we've been infiltrated!...What did you do with Rodd?!:eek:


:D...Excellent impression

[crabapple]

.............Then you will, um, make........a...monkeys are scary and so are dogs and sometime cats......

Look. House, haunted house, is always one on end of street. Dark, very dark. See? We always simpole advice. Make ghost, he flap in windew, have a good loud noise. Collect five dollatrs from each audience member constituent. Instant profit just like hollywood! :D :rolleyes: :mad: :eek: ;)

[Dante'sInferno]

What?I said weak because Massacre man said epic movie.I didn't direct weak at ferretchucker.That kids smarter then some adults and he's like 13.He'll get better once he gets older.So,i say continue with your story ferret.

[XtRaVa]

Uwe Boll doesnt have one movie with a rating of over 4.5/10 on IMDB. I started watching Alone in the Dark once. Turned it off after 20 mins (and wanted to be dead).

Cant believe he's doing the Far Cry film...Wish he would stop fucking up game-to-movie adaptations...

[bloodrayne]

Uwe Boll doesnt have one movie with a rating of over 4.5/10 on IMDB. I started watching Alone in the Dark once. Turned it off after 20 mins (and wanted to be dead)Oh, that's weird...I didn't finish Alone In The Dark either...But, I gave it maybe 30 minutes...at least

Wish he would stop fucking up game-to-movie adaptations...Or actually PLAY one of the games first to see what they're about, or what the characters are like...Or at least WATCH someone play the game...Read the back of the case maybe?

I just can't believe how bad he fucked up BloodRayne...That was NOT BloodRayne...Absolutely nothing like her personality (took out her sharp tongue and sarcastic wit, removed her strength, pride and independence, basicly left out everything that she was and made her something she was not, and could never be)...BloodRayne would NEVER do the things that were done in the movie...I could go on and on, so I'll stop here...

[Dante'sInferno]

Haha.Bloodrayne and Alone of the dark are getting sequels.Anyway,that guy's an asshole.So full of himself.And what does he do to pay us back for being an ass?Make terrible fucking movies like Alone In The Dark.HAH!One guy who shouldnt even be making movies,is.AND he's making fucking sequels.Well once,Massacre and I get into hollywood,we'll save the horror genre.So good luck to us.

[newb]

We were just joking....lighten up.

http://www.opusadvisory.com/uploads/jester.jpg

[bloodrayne]

ooooo...Sechzy Jester


:p

[illdojo]

We were just joking....lighten up.

http://www.opusadvisory.com/uploads/jester.jpg

:D :D DITTO :D :D

[ferretchucker]

well. Thanks a LOT (Not sarcastic) XtRaVa and everyone else, well, i could go off on one but i'm not that kind of person so i think we'll all just put all of it down as a joke, even if some wasn't.

Okay. Next and FINAL! part. Then i will do my own stand-alone movie. So, can i have some ideas?

Bloodrayne: It's safe to come down!

From another rope comes XtRaVa.

XtRaVa: Hey, i told you I'd be coming soon. (He'll get that joke). What's the situation?

BloodRayne: One thousand deadites, a dead, handless guy, a couple of kids and that guy.

She points at Mothman.

Mothman: Fuck off!

He draws a sawn-off and fires aimlessly. It misses XtRaVa by an inch and goes through the window. Deadite-illdojo falls to the floor.

XtRaVa: GO UPSTAIRS YOU TWO!

MassacreMan: Screw you!

XtRaVa Draws a pistol and shoots MassacreMans foot.

MassacreMan: You BASATARD!

Before massacre man can fight back, Horrorobsessed pulls him upstairs.

XtRaVa: Stay still! Now put your hands on the ground!

BloodRayne: They're coming in!

A few windows have smashed and deadite-Kemal is crawling in.

Cut to an upstairs shot where Horrorobsessed and MassacreMan are hiding

MassacreMan: Now I'll never get to Hermiones topless scene!

Horrorobsessed: For gods sake, it's one paragraph!

They sit in silence for a while. Slowly, MassacreMan's hands rise up until they are touching horrorobsessed's breast. She swipes his hand off. She's glaring at him and he turns away. Within millimetres is Zeros face, smiling back at MassacreMan.

Horrorobsessed: FUCK!

Massacre man is quickly dragged into a cupboard. Horrorobsessed watches, wincing everytime MassacreMan shows pain. She hears some punching and zero shrieking in pain. The door swing open and Massacre Man stands there, looking at her silently. She walks towards him and he falls over. Behind him is a smiling Zero.

Horrorobsessed: You sent me to a FUCKING mental asylum. You've killed SO many people that I knew and I am not FUCKING gonna let you kill me.

They struggle, Horrorobsessed makes several gashes in his back with the machette but it get's knocked out of her hands. He bites her arm. She kicks him in the face. He pulls out a clump of hair the size of a banana. she headbutts him. He kicks her across the room, into a diving tank sized aerosole. She picks it up and runs over to him, bashing im over the head with it. He's bleeding all over and has a couple of bones stinking out. The aerosole trigger gets broken and is constantly letting out gas. As she's about to hit him a final time, He reaches for a box of matches.

Horrorobsessed: NO! NO YOU DON'T FUCKING DARE!

She runs out of the room and down the stairs. past the dead body of ferretchucker. Past a headless mothman. Past a deadite Novarku. Onto the front porch. A rope is being lifted from the helicopter. She runs and jumps to get it. SUCESS! She starts climbing up when the house explodes. Flames ingulf her but she carries on climbing 'til she gets to the top. XtRaVa and BloodRayne are there.

XtRaVa: I didn't think you'd make it. Where's your friend?

Horrorobsessed: Gone...

BloodRayne: Putting her arm on her shoulders. I'm sorrry. Now let's get those burns treated. WHERE'S THE FIRST AID KIT?

XtRaVa: Here ya go.

Bloodrayne: okay, i'm just gonna-

She looks at the still body of horrorobsessed.

Bloodrayne: She's...dead.

The bleeding bitemark on horrorobsessed's arm suddenly throbs. And her eyes open.

XtRaVa: SHIT!

The pilot looks behind him and jumps out. As the helicopter goes down and the savage noises of horrorobsessed are heard, the credits start rolling and you once again here XtRaVa

XtRaVa: SSSSSHHHHHIIIIIITTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[XtRaVa]

Oooh...I hope that Xtrava guy makes it! :)

[massacre man]

This was pretty short.

[Dante'sInferno]

Erm...Can i make an appearence where i eat someone?That would be sweet.

[ferretchucker]

THE short, 1 part SIDESTORY! (What happened at the same time as the main story.)

Shortly before the zombie attack, in __V__'s apartment.

__V__: Fuck I hate being diabetic. Fucking aunty ruby and her home made cookies.

He injects himself with insulin.

Just after the attack in the apartment...

Inside the minivan, the body of __V__ twitches a little bit as the deadites begin to feast. His eyes open.

__V__: What? N-n-n...

His eyes roll back into his head and he lives no more. within seconds, where his bod once la, was just a pool of blood. The deadite dante, who had become a kind of leader, looked up. Zero was holding another piece of meat. he throws it.

Dante: NNNYYYYAAARNNNGGG!

The deadite swarms pick up his scent, but before they follow him, they continue to reak havoc on the city.

A little while later.

Dante: YYYRRRAAAAARRROOOWWW!

The thousands of deadites pick up the scent of massacre man, and follow him to his hut.

Just after iidojo was shot...

The deadite army begin to slowly fall. something in their blood has mutated them once more, and they are beginning to pass it.

One week after the mayhem...

News Reporter: Well...it's over. The last zombie died last night whilst being studied. It has been confirmed that insulin, in all the people they had killed who had recenltly injected them muated their bodies to the point that they couldn't take it...

A rotting woman slowly walks onto the screen. The news reporter tries to run but she pounces and grabs him. The camera man can be heard running away, and the shocked people in the studio are seen with scratches on their arms. In the background, the sounds of the news reporter being killed are heard as well as noises from security guards running, guns firing and horrorobsesed feeding.

[crabapple]

It's actually.....kind of creepy, isn't it?

[ferretchucker]

what? the story?

[crabapple]

Yes, the story! That is damn right.

[ferretchucker]

is that a compliment i hear? Wow. Where am I?

thanks. sorry you weren't in it...

[Zero]

Fertt: Y0ou schould make SCARY. I want a cold shi ver of fear when I read you script! Make good scary now, you have the powah. Bring all monkeys, they frighten many much...theyjump up and down,. make oook noises, them have scary long tails. Is frightening animal,

boogey boogey boogedy boo

[massacre man]

Well the trilogy has drawn to a close, what's next for it? Will it become a Quadrilogy? Will people who join this forum a year from now read them? Will Diane tell Stacy that Paul is having an affair with Steven? Who knows?