View Full Version : my miserable life (part 2)
ok - so i decided to do a good deed and help a friend do some volunteer work at a local food pantry. there ramp was rotting away and since most of the clients are elderly and many in wheel chairs or on walkers the ramp was a necessity. no problem. we tear it down and rebuild it fairly quickly. . . but then we run out of carpet tacks that we were using to tack down the carpeting (duh) and he heads out to get some more. while he's gone i realized the ramp was sort of in the way of the food pantry entrance so i pick it up (it only weighted about 70 to 80 pounds) and decide i'll carry it inside to the back so we won't be in the way.
of course, i stupidly forget that with the ramp gone there is a huge step up and proceed to trip over the step and fall forward. my only thought is to save the ramp (which we'd spent two hours rebuilding) so i twist and turn to land under the ramp. . . and proceed to break my hand in two places. . . so now i have to wear this temporary cast thingy (like david hasselhoff) and can only type with my right forefinger. what really sucks is that i am tragically right-handed - can't do anything with my left so. . . to beat you to the punchline - my sex life is ruined for weeks (oh and i can barely eat or brush my teeth or even tie my shoes)
and that's what you get for doing a good deed!
hammerfan
08-04-2006, 06:57 AM
Ever heard the saying "No good deed goes unpunished"?
Originally posted by hammerfan
Ever heard the saying "No good deed goes unpunished"?
i feel that throbbing up my right forearm every few seconds --- ouch
Vodstok
08-04-2006, 07:18 AM
Originally posted by Zero
my sex life is ruined for weeks (oh and i can barely eat or brush my teeth or even tie my shoes)
I did something similar. My wife got me a beautiful new knife set with a block (Calphalon hand ground, full tang stainless steel). They are RAZOR sharp and absolutely gorgeous.
I finally got around to washing them SAturday morning, at the start of a day where we were going to finish as much of the home improvement on our house as possible (you can see where this is going.....)
i was cleaning the 8 inch slicing knife, doing everything properly with the blade facing out, cleaning it from the back. The damn sponge stuck, my hand slipped and i cut my right forefingger and thumb. My thumb bled pretty bad, but was in okay shape, it didnt bite too deeply. My forefinger was another story. You could see meat exposed, and it was bleeding like a stuck pig.
Long story short, i spent 3 hours waiting with my wife and 8 month old daughter in the waiting room for 4 damn stiches and a vicoden prescription.
i also am right handed. the first major hurdle (aside from Typing for a living.....) was wiping my ass.
hammerfan
08-04-2006, 07:29 AM
Originally posted by Zero
i feel that throbbing up my right forearm every few seconds --- ouch
I feel for you, Zero. I started physical therapy on my shoulder yesterday - my shoulder is very sore today. I hope you feel better soon!
thanks for the sympathy and sorry to hear about all the various aches and injuries. . . i just went to my g.p the next day rather than try the ER thing
wiping and typing are very difficult - and so was opening beer last night
Vodstok
08-04-2006, 08:15 AM
my advice on the beer thing is to avoid cans like the plague; stick with bottles and use a good-sized bottle opener. If all else fails, you can hold the beer between your legs and use your left hand for the opener.
or stick to hard liquor with screw on lids. if you drink wine, have a freind open it for you.
crabapple
08-04-2006, 08:16 AM
Hopefully it is some concolation to reflect that most people's lives are miserable to some degree. Try to keep positive! It's an uphill battle but what the hey. Venting helps, hence this thread. Sit down today and watch a funny movie if you can or do something similar, get a few laughs
I raise my glass to MISERABLE today for miserable we all are and so shall we stay! Here's to miserable.
Vodstok
08-04-2006, 08:24 AM
want to kick miserable in the nuts and then stomp on his throat. I have had enough of miserable and would like to invite over Rest and Relaxation for a threesome. Or at least a movie.
Originally posted by crabapple
Hopefully it is some concolation to reflect that most people's lives are miserable to some degree. Try to keep positive! It's an uphill battle but what the hey. Venting helps, hence this thread. Sit down today and watch a funny movie if you can or do something similar, get a few laughs
I raise my glass to MISERABLE today for miserable we all are and so shall we stay! Here's to miserable.
in fairness many of the folks going into the food pantry for assistance seemed much worse off than me even with my hurt hand
stubbornforgey
08-04-2006, 12:28 PM
Originally posted by Zero
thanks for the sympathy and sorry to hear about all the various aches and injuries. . . i just went to my g.p the next day rather than try the ER thing
wiping and typing are very difficult - and so was opening beer last night
Have you ever considered making money
by writing an auto biography on ure life.
This seems funny..but on the same token..sad.
You poor fuckin monkey.
Damn..'waits in anticipation for prt3'
Vodstok
08-04-2006, 12:30 PM
"on top of everything else that has been happening to me, i have someone in New Zealnd giving me shit..."
:D
Sorry to hear about your troubles Zero.....but it is a good source of entertainment for us folk.:D
Ya never really appreciate the simple things..i.e. wiping ones own ass..until it becomes difficult....last month I threw my back out and had trouble doing that......it SUCKED.....I had to learn a whole new technique.....going around instead of between the leggs....not so easy when your in excruciating pain.
crabapple
08-04-2006, 08:59 PM
I got a piece of fuckin' glass stuck in my foot today. It was groovy.
Originally posted by crabapple
I got a piece of fuckin' glass stuck in my foot today. It was groovy.
so now crabby can't wipe his ass either!
:p
crabapple
08-05-2006, 07:47 AM
your crazy person
!!!!!!!
Only weird little monkeys do everyting with their feet like that.
Originally posted by crabapple
your crazy person
!!!!!!!
Only weird little monkeys do everyting with their feet like that.
*flings dung at Crabby . . . . with My Left Foot*
Originally posted by Zero
*flings dung at Crabby . . . . with My Left Foot*
Double Oscar winner
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/thumb/3/31/150px-Myleftfoot1.jpg