Cheating?

[bloodrayne]

It seems that not all of us have the same definition of 'cheating' *cough* Bill Clinton *cough*....So, I wonder...What do you guys consider cheating and what do you think is just fine?....Is looking okay?...Flirting?...Maybe even a kiss?.......I don't feel right about even THINKING about someone else 'that way' when I'm in a relationship.....

[The Mothman]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
*cough* Bill Clinton *cough
waaaaaaatch it.

lets not bring politics into this forum.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The Mothman
waaaaaaatch it.

lets not bring politics into this forum. HAHA...We've been there, done that SOOO many times here...Had some real 'knock down, drag outs'....Horror even said that he was going to give us our own seperate 'Political Debates' forum.....Don't know what the hell ever happened to THAT :rolleyes:

[urgeok]

i dont believe in cheating ..

and kissing is to me the most intimite act of all ...


but there is a huge difference between what some people say is flirting and how i define it.

to me flirting is showing interest and letting the other person know that the door of opportunity is wide open..

i dont consider telling someone that they are attractive .. or goofing around ('meet you at the motel at 7:00pm') is flirting ...

anyone i joke around with knows where i'm coming from.

it does piss me of fthough that people consider complimenting a woman on her appearance flirting ...

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
i dont believe in cheating ..

and kissing is to me the most intimite act of all ...


but there is a huge difference between what some people say is flirting and how i define it.

to me flirting is showing interest and letting the other person know that the door of opportunity is wide open..

i dont consider telling someone that they are attractive .. or goofing around ('meet you at the motel at 7:00pm') is flirting ...

anyone i joke around with knows where i'm coming from.

it does piss me of fthough that people consider complimenting a woman on her appearance flirting ... Wow...I had no idea that we thought so much alike on this one....

[The STE]

Hard to say. Besides the obvious stuff, of course

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
It seems that not all of us have the same definition of 'cheating' *cough* Bill Clinton *cough*....So, I wonder...What do you guys consider cheating and what do you think is just fine?....Is looking okay?...Flirting?...Maybe even a kiss?.......I don't feel right about even THINKING about someone else 'that way' when I'm in a relationship.....

I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. Except looking. Looking, I think, is okay.

[Babygurl20]

I some what agree with Urge on this one. It's cheating to me if you actually fall in love with the person with whom you are talking to etc. Kissing is cheating, and of course having sex is cheating, but telling someone they are hot or even letting someone know your interested in them to me is not cheating


I could go on and on about this one, cuz I have been played in every relationship I have been in, so I am just going to shut my mouth and sit back and read what everyone else has to say

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
I'm pretty much in the same boat as you. Except looking. Looking, I think, is okay. Well..That kinda depends for me...I mean there's looking, and thinking something like "that guy is attractive"....And then there's looking and thinking something like "Oh man!...I want some o' that!".....So, I actually think the 'thinking' part, plays a bigger role than it seems...

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by Babygurl20
Kissing is cheating, and of course having sex is cheating, but telling someone they are hot or even letting someone know your interested in them to me is not cheatingBut...If you're already in a relationship, how could you possibly BE "interested" in someone else?

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
But...If you're already in a relationship, how could you possibly BE "interested" in someone else?

i think you could see the potential of what might have been ..

its if you allow yourself to get too wrapped up in it or not that is the problem.


i've met women that i thought were great and if i was single i would love to have a chance to get to know them .. but i wouldnt dwell on it .. it isnt a threat to my relationship ..

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
But...If you're already in a relationship, how could you possibly BE "interested" in someone else?

Back in November, when I was going out with my ex, there was this girl in my 2nd and 4th hours that I had started developing feelings for. But, given that I was already in a relationship, I ignored them. They were (and are) there, but I did nothing about them.

Would you consider that cheating?

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
Well..That kinda depends for me...I mean there's looking, and thinking something like "that guy is attractive"....And then there's looking and thinking something like "Oh man!...I want some o' that!".....So, I actually think the 'thinking' part, plays a bigger role than it seems...

i think there is a huge number of guys that equate liking the looks of a girl with wanting to tap it.

I've always been content to enjoy the view.
Even the times between relationships i'd usually rather look ..
you can instinctually tell that some people are a lot more interesting to look at than to be with.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
i think you could see the potential of what might have been ..

its if you allow yourself to get too wrapped up in it or not that is the problem.


i've met women that i thought were great and if i was single i would love to have a chance to get to know them .. but i wouldnt dwell on it .. it isnt a threat to my relationship .. But...If you go so far as to 'let someone know' that you're interested in them...What would the point of that be?...If you have no intention of leaving the person you're with, you'd just be leading the other person on...And, I just think that if you really love someone, you CAN'T think of any other 'possibilities'...I think that telling someone you're interested in them would be getting 'wrapped up' in something that shouldn't...

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
But...If you go so far as to 'let someone know' that you're interested in them...What would the point of that be?...If you have no intention of leaving the person you're with, you'd just be leading the other person on...And, I just think that if you really love someone, you CAN'T think of any other 'possibilities'...I think that telling someone you're interested in them would be getting 'wrapped up' in something that shouldn't...

no i wouldnt let them know ..

maybe interested is 2 different things for you and me ..
i'm not talking about sexual tension .. i'm talking more about friendship ... admiring someone for the person they are ...
not some growing desire to bed them ..

[The STE]

oh, yeah, telling someone you're interested wouldn't be right

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
Back in November, when I was going out with my ex, there was this girl in my 2nd and 4th hours that I had started developing feelings for. But, given that I was already in a relationship, I ignored them. They were (and are) there, but I did nothing about them.

Would you consider that cheating? I would take that as a sign that the person you were with, probably wasn't really the person you actually wanted to BE with....If you are in a relationship, and you feel yourself 'developing feelings' for someone else...That's probably a good time to face the fact that you aren't really in love with the person you are with, and that you may just be wasting your time...And theirs...

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
I would take that as a sign that the person you were with, probably wasn't really the person you actually wanted to BE with....If you are in a relationship, and you feel yourself 'developing feelings' for someone else...That's probably a good time to face the fact that you aren't really in love with the person you are with, and that you may just be wasting your time...And theirs...

well, you apparenlty would've been right anyways.

I probably should've stayed out of this one, the only experience I can draw from isn't really a good example

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
I would take that as a sign that the person you were with, probably wasn't really the person you actually wanted to BE with....If you are in a relationship, and you feel yourself 'developing feelings' for someone else...That's probably a good time to face the fact that you aren't really in love with the person you are with, and that you may just be wasting your time...And theirs...

didnt you see Dr Zhivago ? :D

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
no i wouldnt let them know ..

maybe interested is 2 different things for you and me ..
i'm not talking about sexual tension .. i'm talking more about friendship ... admiring someone for the person they are ...
not some growing desire to bed them .. And again...There is the difference in semantics....I view being interested in someone as being interested in a possible relationship with them...

[Babygurl20]

I know what all of ya'll are saying and I agree to that, but I'm not talking about coming out to the person and saying "Hey I have feelings for you" blah blah. I'm saying.......well I guess I'm saying I think it's alright to flirt with someone. Just don't take it past that line and end up in a downward spiral of emotions for the both of them.

In your case STE, I would not consider that cheating at all. You didn't act on your feelings, so no harm was done.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
well, you apparenlty would've been right anyways.

I probably should've stayed out of this one, the only experience I can draw from isn't really a good example You really should talk to this 'other' girl...


Originally posted by The urgeok
didnt you see Dr Zhivago ?Actually...No...lol



I hate to admit it, but I really haven't watched very many movies that aren't horror related.....A few comedies, but otherwise, I'm pretty single-minded that way...

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
You really should talk to this 'other' girl...


See previous post re: Shot Down

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
And again...There is the difference in semantics....I view being interested in someone as being interested in a possible relationship with them...


well, i'd have to explain for you to see where i'm coming from ..

I've never dated ..per say.

the thought of going somewhere with someone i dont know just because i liked the way they looked terrified me. I couldn't make it through a meal if the person turned out to be a ding-dong.

the girls i ended up with were friends at first .. i wanted to get to know then under more relaxed circumstances.

If she turned out to be someone i could actually enjoy talking with .. then it would naturely evolve into a relationship.

so if i'm in a relationship and i meet someone else and they have a lot of the qualities i like .. then naturally i would think the person is cool and i could recognize the potential ... but that would be the same or less than what i have now .. so there would be no need or desire to push on with it ...

and honestly - when i was in my 1st marriage and things were going horribly - i never had the desire to cheat then either ... although - believe it or not.. i was offered a wicked chance to.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
See previous post re: Shot Down Damn...

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
and honestly - when i was in my 1st marriage and things were going horribly - i never had the desire to cheat then either ... although - believe it or not.. i was offered a wicked chance to. You're just a really good man ;)

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
You're just a really good man ;)

i dont think thats it ... i just hate complications :D

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
i dont think thats it ... i just hate complications :D lol...Or it could be that...

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
Damn...

yeah, sucks, don't it? The Ring movies have an erie parallel to this kind of stuff happening.

The Ring: I mention that I'm going to see the Ring, and JUST before I ask if this girl I like wants to go, she mentions that she's going with her b/f (didn't know she had one) to homecoming

The Ring 2: Shot down right after we left.


There's a sign somewhere in there...

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
lol...Or it could be that...

another saving grace is that i'm REALLY fucking fussy about who i want to spend time with.

you wouldnt think i could afford that luxury but i know the reality of being stuck with the wrong person and trying to get out of it...(just relationships - i'm not even talking about the failed marriage)


I'd rather be alone than be with someone i cant communicate with .. and the people i can communicate with at that intimite a level are few and far between.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by The STE
yeah, sucks, don't it? The Ring movies have an erie parallel to this kind of stuff happening.

The Ring: I mention that I'm going to see the Ring, and JUST before I ask if this girl I like wants to go, she mentions that she's going with her b/f (didn't know she had one) to homecoming

The Ring 2: Shot down right after we left.


There's a sign somewhere in there...

you're going to save money on a ring.. (well, with them anyway)

[Babygurl20]

Originally posted by urgeok
another saving grace is that i'm REALLY fucking fussy about who i want to spend time with.

you wouldnt think i could afford that luxury but i know the reality of being stuck with the wrong person and trying to get out of it...(just relationships - i'm not even talking about the failed marriage)


I'd rather be alone than be with someone i cant communicate with .. and the people i can communicate with at that intimite a level are few and far between.
Wish I was like that about rather be alone than with somebody you can't communicate with. I'm the type of girl who can't stand being alone. I know it is so fuckin crazy, b/c I'm only 20, but I have this fear of being alone and winding up alone.........call me crazy.

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
yeah, sucks, don't it? The Ring movies have an erie parallel to this kind of stuff happening.

The Ring: I mention that I'm going to see the Ring, and JUST before I ask if this girl I like wants to go, she mentions that she's going with her b/f (didn't know she had one) to homecoming

The Ring 2: Shot down right after we left.


There's a sign somewhere in there... Whoa...That makes me wonder what would happen if you invited a girl over to watch Ringu with you...Hmm...Maybe you'd better not...heh

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by Babygurl20
Wish I was like that about rather be alone than with somebody you can't communicate with. I'm the type of girl who can't stand being alone. I know it is so fuckin crazy, b/c I'm only 20, but I have this fear of being alone and winding up alone.........call me crazy. But...Being with someone you can't communicate with is the same as being alone...only with irritation....I, personally, would rather do without the irritation...

[X¤MurderDoll¤X]

I would have trouble explaining my definition of cheating. It would sound like a "cheaters" definition I guess, even though I'm not really that way anyway.

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
Whoa...That makes me wonder what would happen if you invited a girl over to watch Ringu with you...Hmm...Maybe you'd better not...heh

Maybe Ringu would only have an effect if she were asian...and the STE does like him some asian girls...

[bwind22]

If it's something that you'd be pissed about, it's cheating.

If I saw my girl making out with some dude, I'd be pissed and consider it cheating, therefore if I were to do the same thing with a different girl, it would be cheating.

Just make sure your parameters are celarly defined. Maybe your girl wouldnt care if you kissed another girl, but you would hit the ceiling if she kissed another guy. Those kind of things are good to figure out when starting a relationship.

It's all about trust. If you are sneaking around doing stuff with someone of the opposite sex that is not your significant other and you have no intention to let your significant other know about it, I'd call it cheating.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bwind22
If it's something that you'd be pissed about, it's cheating.

Maybe your girl wouldnt care if you kissed another girl,


pretty good rule of thumb .. but your significant other would have to agree eye to eye on it.


also... i'd pay good money to have my wife kiss another girl.
it ain't happening.

[crazy raplh]

eatin aint cheatin'

[urgeok]

i've been waiting all this time for someone to say that

[bwind22]

beatin' aint cheatin' either.

[ENTITY2000]

hey what's wrong with alittle strange every once
in awhile? i mean you all are talking like your freak'n saints.
i this i that i wouldn't do that. but i guess we have our own
thing:D

[The STE]

And I guess your thing
is typing so that noone
can understand you

[urgeok]

i dont think i'm a saint ...


if i sound all noble its really just to cover that no one else would want to jump my bones anyway :D

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
i dont think i'm a saint ...


if i sound all noble its really just to cover that no one else would want to jump my bones anyway :D LOL...I'm no saint either...I just give what I expect to get in return...I wouldn't do anything that I wouldn't want my guy to do.....I think that cheating is grounds for a break up, and I happen to like havin' my guy around.....That's really pretty much all it is........That, and the fact that, messing around would be pointless for me, cuz I already have everything I want, and all that I need, right here at home...

Why go out for hamburgers when ya got prime rib at home?...Just seems kinda stupid to me ;)

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
LOL...I'm no saint either...I just give what I expect to get in return...I wouldn't do anything that I wouldn't want my guy to do.....I think that cheating is grounds for a break up, and I happen to like havin' my guy around.....That's really pretty much all it is........That, and the fact that, messing around would be pointless for me, cuz I already have everything I want, and all that I need, right here at home...

Why go out for hamburgers when ya got prime rib at home?...Just seems kinda stupid to me ;)

bad analogy .. i'd take hamburgers over prime rib anyday :D

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by urgeok
bad analogy .. i'd take hamburgers over prime rib anyday :D Umm...Okay then....How about...Why go out for hot dogs when you got Lobster at home?...Better?



LOL...Either way...You get my point:)

[The STE]

Originally posted by urgeok
bad analogy .. i'd take hamburgers over prime rib anyday :D

Ok, then, why go for hamburgers when you have hamburgers without any STDs at home?

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
Ok, then, why go for hamburgers when you have hamburgers without any STDs at home? HaHa...Another VERY good point ;)

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
HaHa...Another VERY good point ;)

*chew, chew* Hey, this burger tastes like supperating urethras!

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
*chew, chew* Hey, this burger tastes like supperating urethras! Blech...*pukes on thread*

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
Blech...*pukes on thread*

Victory is mine!

[bloodrayne]

Originally posted by The STE
Victory is mine! HaHaHa...You ALWAYS do that to me.....

[X¤MurderDoll¤X]

most people "cheat" atleast once.

Also a lot of people go on with relationships that they know aren't going anywhere. I have cheated before, but not on my current boyfriend. I guess that could change down the line, who knows? I think it only cheapens your relationship, but if you're not going to marry the person, I say cheapen away.

Also a lot of people including myself would be pressed to find a guy/girl they'd rather fuck than their girlfriend/boyfriend. Sex isn't all physical.

Basically... I don't believe in the act of cheating being bad. I believe in knowingly doing something that would hurt someone you love, being bad. If you don't love him, your happiness comes way before his/her's.

I thikn this is all jumbled.. I'll fix it up when I'm semi-capable of thinking straight.

[The STE]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
HaHaHa...You ALWAYS do that to me.....

I do a lot of things to you ;)

[bwind22]

Originally posted by X¤MurderDoll¤X
most people "cheat" atleast once.

Also a lot of people go on with relationships that they know aren't going anywhere. I have cheated before, but not on my current boyfriend. I guess that could change down the line, who knows? I think it only cheapens your relationship, but if you're not going to marry the person, I say cheapen away.

Also a lot of people including myself would be pressed to find a guy/girl they'd rather fuck than their girlfriend/boyfriend. Sex isn't all physical.

Basically... I don't believe in the act of cheating being bad. I believe in knowingly doing something that would hurt someone you love, being bad. If you don't love him, your happiness comes way before his/her's.

I thikn this is all jumbled.. I'll fix it up when I'm semi-capable of thinking straight.


You sound scandalous as hell! If you aren't into your significant other, don't fuck around behind their back. Get some fuckin' gonads and just break up with them! Why would you lead them on while cheating on them and thereby setting them up for a crushing blow when they find out their girls a hoe. It sounds very meanspirited and cruel. I'm not saying I'd hit a girl, but if she did that shit to me, I'd definately be thinking about it.

[urgeok]

i think - and i may be wrong - that MD is saying that she'd cheat if the relationship didnt mean much .. so i guess it would be pretty much over anyway. so its not so much a cheat as a change ..

i wouldnt hit a girl for cheating .. i'd just walk ..

[X¤MurderDoll¤X]

Originally posted by urgeok
i think - and i may be wrong - that MD is saying that she'd cheat if the relationship didnt mean much .. so i guess it would be pretty much over anyway. so its not so much a cheat as a change ..


yeah

[LilMissScareAll]

I think any form of cheating is bad... even them talking to someone else makes me jealous. haha...but that's just me. I'm an extremely jealous person. Which is probably 1 reason I'm not in a relationship and probably never will be again.

[DraculaInDallas]

Originally posted by bloodrayne
It seems that not all of us have the same definition of 'cheating' *cough* Bill Clinton *cough*....So, I wonder...What do you guys consider cheating and what do you think is just fine?....Is looking okay?...Flirting?...Maybe even a kiss?.......I don't feel right about even THINKING about someone else 'that way' when I'm in a relationship.....

:p interesting.....

[crazy raplh]

looking and talking is fine, there is nothing wrong with flirting. My GF doesn't care if I play pimpo as long as I don't bring anyone home or go homne with anyone.

[X¤MurderDoll¤X]

mmm free drinks and ego boosts.

[Spallalala]

Ok.. Cheating is not good not matter how you look at it. I would never nor would I consider cheating.
I have friends that have been cheated on and its fucked with them big time.
Wether or not you like the person your with. Theres no excuse in the world for anyone to cheat. Its a fucked up thing to do.
If your not interested bloody tell em. Your gonna hurt em either way but its easier to tell then to cheat.

I consider cheating, flirting, kissing and anything more then that.

I dont consider looking anything wrong. Cause shit I do it myself.

For some reason if a guy has been cheated on once they seem to think that every woman is gonna do the same thing ( this is not for all men. some actually have brains to figure out that this is bullshit )

[urgeok]

Originally posted by Spallalala
I dont consider looking anything wrong. Cause shit I do it myself.




i've seen you looking at me ...


wanna cheat ? :D

[Danni_bear]

hmm, looking but not touching is ok, flirting is acceptable. just natural really..but if you act on it then your a dirty ole cheat :)

[urgeok]

how about sticking your finger in someone elses bum ?

is that cheating .. or just unsanitary ?


Drs. do it .......... filthy buggers.

[BoneSaw]

this is a very interesting topic, because it strikes home for me. i have been married almost 7 years and i have been fighting urges for a while. i say fighting because it is a constant struggle. when i married my wife, i stood up and promised her, myself, and my god that i would remain faithful to her and our relationship. it has been very interesting to say the least. i love her very much, and would never physically cheat on her, but i have cheated on her in my heart. you see, i have come to realize that there are very few things in this world worth having, most less fighting for. honor, though, is one of them. and when i lust after a woman, even though i dont even talk to her, i am dishonoring my self and my wife. because i made that vow, you see. and yet, i cant seem to completely stop doing it.but i try. so i believe that cheating is anything you do that takes your focus away from the person that you have committed yourself to.

[Gren the cake]

when i find that psecial someone i dont even see anyone else anymore

i dunno. anyway, i have cheated. and i probably will. well, i dont really plan on it. but, whatever. ;) if its meant to be its meant to be. if i can find everything i need in 1 preson, cool. but if i have to find it in 6 people, so be it.

but thats when diseases happen, but i been real real real good lately.

[slasherman]

Cheating is ok...Me ? ...never :D

[orangestar]

I've never been cheated on, but I got dumped for letting a guy put his arm around me once... :rolleyes:


Im an extremely jealous girlfriend and I get upset when the person that is supposed to want ME even talks to someone else. But I must admit Im a natural flirt and I cant help myself.

I guess there is a difference between my recent boyfriends and the one boy I've been in love with for 3 years. If I dated him, I cant imagine looking at anyone else.

So that kind of proves my point, right? If you really love someone, you dont need to look anywhere else.