View Full Version : bored
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:31 AM
So I'm sharing bullshit emails from my Mom.....again
a joke
A man goes into a lawyer's office and says, "I heard people have sued the tobacco companies for giving them lung cancer, and McDonald's for making them fat."
The lawyer says, "Yes, that's true."
The man says, "Well, I'm interested in suing too."
The lawyer says, "Okay, McDonald's, or the tobacco companies?"
The man says,
"Neither I'm suing Budweiser for all the ugly people I've slept with."
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:33 AM
...
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:38 AM
bumpersticker
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:40 AM
another
mmmkay...I'm done....for now
AUSTIN316426808
03-12-2005, 01:47 AM
Those are funny ecspecially the second one.
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:49 AM
Okay...maybe I'm not done:D
Marroe
03-12-2005, 01:51 AM
..
Angra
03-12-2005, 02:00 AM
Originally posted by Marroe
..
Thatīs not funny. Just true.:)
Marroe
03-12-2005, 02:06 AM
Originally posted by Angra
Thatīs not funny. Just true.:) true, true
Planned parenthood is a wonderful place..free too. Get the word out, TAKE THE GODDAMN PILLS!!!:mad:
AUSTIN316426808
03-12-2005, 02:11 AM
Originally posted by Marroe
Okay...maybe I'm not done:D
LMAO:D
that one's hilarious.
urgeok
03-12-2005, 03:24 AM
Originally posted by Marroe
So I'm sharing bullshit emails from my Mom.....again
a joke
A man goes into a lawyer's office and says, "I heard people have sued the tobacco companies for giving them lung cancer, and McDonald's for making them fat."
The lawyer says, "Yes, that's true."
The man says, "Well, I'm interested in suing too."
The lawyer says, "Okay, McDonald's, or the tobacco companies?"
The man says,
"Neither I'm suing Budweiser for all the ugly people I've slept with."
i got the same one yesterday
barbra
03-12-2005, 10:31 AM
my dead granny had that jesus bumper sticker
It would be cool to have like 50 or so of the
"cant feed them dont breed them" to tag up my town
ShankS
03-12-2005, 11:24 AM
what do you call a chicken and a hot coal?
bbq.
ItsAlive75
03-12-2005, 11:35 AM
Originally posted by ShankS
what do you call a chicken and a hot coal?
bbq.
That's just kinda describing the parts of a barbecue...
barbra
03-12-2005, 11:43 AM
um...
why did thepot head cross the road
he was chasing the chicken
barbra
03-12-2005, 11:46 AM
The parish priest needs his house painted so he offers the job to one of his altar boys. The first day the kid paints the entire inside of the house, he's sweating like hell but eventually gets it finished. The priest commends him on the work and with a flourish hands him 50p. The boy looks at the coin and says to the priest, "Thanks very much Father, you're a virgin".
The priest is a bit startled but makes no remark. Next day the boy has to paint the outside of the house; it's a really hot day and he just manages to finish the job without collapsing. The priest looks at the job and this time gives the lad a pound coin. Once again the lad looks at the coin and says, "Thanks very much Father, you really are a virgin".
At this stage the priest decides to take action. "Tommy," he says, "that's twice you called me a virgin. Do you have any idea what the word means?"
"Yes" says the brat, "a tight c*nt."
barbra
03-12-2005, 11:49 AM
PROOF THAT JESUS WAS...
...Jewish:
1. He went into his father's business.
2. He lived at home until the age of 33.
3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God.
...Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He never held a steady job.
3. His last request was a drink.
...Puerto Rican:
1. His first name was Jesus.
2. He was always in trouble with the law.
3. His mother did not know who his father was.
...Italian:
1. He talked with his hands.
2. He had wine with every meal.
3. He used olive oil.
...Black:
1. He called everybody brother.
2. He liked Gospel.
3. He couldn't get a fair trial.
...Californian:
1. He never cut his hair.
2. He walked around barefoot all the time.
3. He started a new religion.
But the most compelling evidence of all - proof that Jesus was a WOMAN:
1. He had to feed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was no food.
2 . He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it.
3. Even when he was dead, He had to get up because there was more work for him to do.
ShankS
03-12-2005, 11:56 AM
Originally posted by ItsAlive75
That's just kinda describing the parts of a barbecue...
I like my chicken burnt like coal
barbra
03-12-2005, 02:53 PM
Originally posted by ShankS
I like my chicken burnt like coal chicken jerky
Originally posted by Marroe
So I'm sharing bullshit emails from my Mom.....again
a joke
A man goes into a lawyer's office and says, "I heard people have sued the tobacco companies for giving them lung cancer, and McDonald's for making them fat."
The lawyer says, "Yes, that's true."
The man says, "Well, I'm interested in suing too."
The lawyer says, "Okay, McDonald's, or the tobacco companies?"
The man says,
"Neither I'm suing Budweiser for all the ugly people I've slept with."
hmmm....should I be insulted....this is my wife.
http://www.grimmemennesker.dk/data/media/1/36.jpg
AUSTIN316426808
03-12-2005, 08:33 PM
Originally posted by newb
hmmm....should I be insulted....this is my wife.
http://www.grimmemennesker.dk/data/media/1/36.jpg
isn't that the guy from the ''bitter beer'' commercials?
barbra
03-12-2005, 08:40 PM
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
A: The blonde works in the dark!
Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
A: The joystick is wet.
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
Q: What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?
A: "Have another beer."
Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Q: What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A: The more you bang it the looser it gets.
AUSTIN316426808
03-12-2005, 08:52 PM
Originally posted by barbra
Green Bay Packers?
Go Pack Go!!!
barbra
03-12-2005, 09:03 PM
Originally posted by AUSTIN316426808
Go Pack Go!!!
AUSTIN316426808
03-12-2005, 09:25 PM
....
barbra
03-12-2005, 11:40 PM
Originally posted by newb
hmmm....should I be insulted....this is my wife.
she gets around huh?
http://www.freddypharkas.com/tmdbohah/images/rabies.png
Marroe
03-13-2005, 12:02 PM
Originally posted by newb
hmmm....should I be insulted....this is my wife.
http://www.grimmemennesker.dk/data/media/1/36.jpg I don't know? Do you think your wife is ugly?:p
ItsAlive75
03-13-2005, 01:26 PM
Originally posted by AUSTIN316426808
Go Pack Go!!!
Boooooo......
GO BEARS!!!!:D :) :p
AUSTIN316426808
03-13-2005, 05:56 PM
Originally posted by ItsAlive75
Boooooo......
GO BEARS!!!!:D :) :p
there's nobody on that team that's in the same vicinity of Favre.