I Nekro?

[IDrinkYourBlood]

So I'v been having these re-occuring dream of my gf in the cemetary in a crypt laying on a cement coffin only covered by a silk blanket. I come in wearing a dark suit and a pretty cool looking cape(who doesnt like capes?) and i start to kiss her and then i get to biusness on her. And i think this is the hottest thing ever. This isnt wrong is it?.......

[urgeok]

Originally posted by IDrinkYourBlood
So I'v been having these re-occuring dream of my gf in the cemetary in a crypt laying on a cement coffin only covered by a silk blanket. I come in wearing a dark suit and a pretty cool looking cape(who doesnt like capes?) and i start to kiss her and then i get to biusness on her. And i think this is the hottest thing ever. This isnt wrong is it?.......

it depends ... if the girlfriend is a jackyll with blood covered fangs and a belly swollen with satans unborn spawn....

......... then i'd say it was perfectly normal.

[ShankS]

you like necrophilia....

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by ShankS
you like necrophilia.... indeed:D

[ShankS]

wow, we realy do get all sorts here... tell me, when you're at the supermarket, do you get turned on by the chickens and cow corpses in the chilled section?

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by ShankS
wow, we realy do get all sorts here... tell me, when you're at the supermarket, do you get turned on by the chickens and cow corpses in the chilled section? haha no, im really only into girls.....but my neighbor did a dog befor.

[ShankS]

did you join in, watch from the shadows salivating.... or go in for your turn when the dog was too knankered to put up resistance?

[urgeok]

shanks ! you have to change that avatar so the crazy drunk guy is there instead of the skull !

[ShankS]

Originally posted by urgeok
shanks ! you have to change that avatar so the crazy drunk guy is there instead of the skull !

but I just found that pic on amazon....

I like it

[urgeok]

it still needs the shanks touch

[ShankS]

Originally posted by urgeok
it still needs the shanks touch

ok ...give us a sec...

[ShankS]

done...

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by ShankS
did you join in, watch from the shadows salivating.... or go in for your turn when the dog was too knankered to put up resistance? man that shits just wrong, everytime i hear here german sheperd yelp, i shudder.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by ShankS
done...

THATS the ticket !!! :D :D

[ShankS]

maybe it needs some care, attention and 'special' loving

[ShankS]

Originally posted by urgeok
THATS the ticket !!! :D :D

KILLIN IS MY BUSINESS!!! :D

[Iniquity]

Necrophilia for Dummies


II: Finding a partner

Finding a partner for your necrophiliac activities is definitely the hardest part. You not only have to gain access to the corpse but you also have to find one which suits your tastes. Granted, some necrophiliacs would screw roadkill if given the chance but most of us are more discriminating. Your chances depend upon where you pick up your date. If you have access to a morgue it would definitely be your best bet as the corpses there are usually the freshest and have not yet been treated for burial. They may be a bit chilly because they've been lying in the meat locker for days but that really shouldn't make a big difference to the determined necrophiliac. Cemeteries are a bit harder to deal with as finding a screwable corpse is harder to do. However, if you know how to interpret signs this shouldn't be a problem. If a grave consists of a mound of fresh dirt and is covered with flowers, chances are that the stiff hasn't been laying here for too long. Rotting flowers on the mound usually hint to the state of the corpse as well. Some people are exclusively into 'porking the bone', i.e. sex with skeletons. In this case you can dig up almost any grave and hope that the inhabitant hasn't yet disintegrated into dust. Try to scope out a fairly secluded cemetery for your passions unless you like a sense of danger to go along with the sex. Having anyone catch you in the act is NOT fun, and if you're picked up by a cop chances are that you won't be able to screw anything but Bubba behind bars for the next few decades. People are generally not understanding of the necrophiliac lifestyle, so it will probably be a long time before we can come out of the closet.

III: Preparation

Depending upon where you are at this point you'll have either a little or a lot of work to do. The person in the morgue will obviously have to do little more than to open the locker, pull the corpse out and bang away. If you're one of the cemetery people you'll have more work to do. An experienced necrophiliac is always equipped with the bare essentials: a shovel, Vaseline and a box of rubbers. Why the shovel is needed should be obvious, but if the ground is hard then you might need more equipment to dig up your date. Vaseline is used to loosen the corpse up a bit. This makes it less likely for a body part to break off while you're having fun and it also prevents your mantool from becoming too irritated while screwing the dried out pussy. The BOX of condoms is used to play it safe; no necrophiliac should be without it. You never know which STDs your partner had during his/her lifetime, and believe me, it doesn't get any better after the person dies. You can put on more than one rubber for extra protection if it is warranted, but screwing a corpse without protection is just plain stupid unless you want to be the next date for a necrophiliac. If you're in a cemetery try to drag the corpse out of the grave and behind a bush or to another secluded place. Pumping away in the grave may seem more convenient, but it's a severe disadvantage to you if you need to take off in a hurry. Sometimes the corpse is too fragile to be moved; in that case make it fast. Or just break off the head, hand or lower torso and take it with you for added convenience.

Note: Vaseline dissolves latex, meaning it will eat through your or dead-boy's condom. Use KY Jelly or anything else that's not oil-based.

Part IV: Techniques

So now you've got a stiff lying seductively in front of you, but you have no idea how to start. How you proceed from this point onward really depends upon what kind of person you are. The corpse will last longer if you treat it gently and with care, but if you prefer to go all out you'll probably receive greater satisfaction. There are many differences between screwing a live and a dead person which one needs to be aware of. Firstly, a corpse will never tell you to get off of it if you're being a bit rough and it will never complain no matter what kinky sexual practices you use it for. Screwing a corpse is also much more predictable because you can raise an arm, leg or whatever and it will still be in that position when you reach for it again. Take the arms and gently lock them in an embrace behind your back, or spread the legs to make sex a bit easier. If you want a great blowjob then lubricate your partner's mouth, lock it to your preferred width, insert and go for it. Although there's no tongue stimulation it's still worthwhile, and it's also safer than conventional sex. Corpses can also be recycled if treated properly. If you're a proficient embalmer you can keep a corpse for over five years if it has been properly embalmed. That's free sex whenever you want it! You naturally don't want to be too rough with an embalmed corpse though as they are more fragile. One final advantage of screwing corpses is that they are always in abundance. Based upon your sexual preferences you can designate a cemetery or a morgue as your territory and always find fresh partners to screw. Plus you don't have to resort to cheesy pickup lines or spend all your money in order to get a date. necrophiliac is a passion which is cheaply satisfied.

Note: Necrophilia is not so cheaply enjoyed unless you already have such direct access.

V. Conclusion

I hope that this text file will encourage you to go out and try necrophilia. Not many people do it, but that's precisely what makes it so much fun; it makes you feel special! If no living person would touch you with a 10 foot pole then try having sex with a corpse! Some of them are real beauties and it's an experience you'll never forget. There is no greater experience for a virgin than having his/her virginity taken by a corpse. Anyways, have fun and if you have any experiences you'd like to share then by all means do! Maybe necrophilia will enter the mainstream because of your efforts.


*grinz*

[urgeok]

remember kids ,, after a long hard days work, there's nothing like taking your shoes off, kicking back, and sucking down a couple of 'cold ones'

[bitch_of_d_west]

Like what d hell is Necrophilia??????

[urgeok]

Originally posted by bitch_of_d_west
Like what d hell is Necrophilia??????


holy fuck, its the return of the idiot

[bitch_of_d_west]

Originally posted by urgeok
holy fuck, its the return of the idiot

Lol you guys CRACK ME UP!!!!!

Here are some lyrics for you rock fanS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!

Pieces Of Me
Ashlee Simpson
(Autobiography)

On a Monday,I am waiting
Tuesday, I am fading
And by Wednesday,I can't sleep
Then the phone rings,I hear you
And the darkness is a clear view
cause you've come to rescue me

Fall... With you,I fall so fast
I can hardly catch my breath,I hope it lasts

[Chorus]
Ohhhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way it feels
Ohhhhhh
It's as if you've known me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces,pieces pieces of me
All the pieces,pieces pieces of me

I am moody,messy
I get restless and it's senseless
How you never seem to care
When I'm angry you listen
When you're happy it's a mission
And you won't stop 'till I'm there

Fall... Sometimes I fall so fast
Well,I hit that bottom
Crash,you're all I have

[Chorus]
ohhhhhh
It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way it feels
Ohhhhh
It's as if you've known me better than
I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
All the pieces,pieces pieces of me

How do you know everything I'm about to say
Am I that obvious
And if it's written on my face, I hope it never goes away

On a Monday,I am waiting
And By Tuesday,I am fading into your arms
So I can breathe

[Chorus]
Ohhhhh It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels
Ohhhhh
It's if you've known me better than I ever knew myself
I love how you can tell
Ohhh
Ilove how you can tell
All the pieces,pieces pieces of me
All the pieces,pieces pieces of me

[urgeok]

now i'm convinced that it's a returning member ...

[bitch_of_d_west]

Originally posted by urgeok
now i'm convinced that it's a returning member ...

Yes i have been here before this forum seems to intrist me.......

[Gren the cake]

lol
harrow

[IDrinkYourBlood]

AH hahaha oh thats the greatest Iniquity, you made my day.

[ShankS]

Originally posted by IDrinkYourBlood
AH hahaha oh thats the greatest Iniquity, you made my day.

yeah it's good. I'm gona print that out and learn it, that way If I can't get sex down the local whore house, I've always got the local cemetry residents to fall back on.

[IDrinkYourBlood]

ShankS, Its pretty sad if you cant get any action at the whore house, pretty sad indeed.

[ShankS]

yeah but they close up early, if they know I'm visiting town.

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by ShankS
yeah but they close up early, if they know I'm visiting town. Oh of course, why wouldnt they.

[Marroe]

Originally posted by urgeok
shanks ! you have to change that avatar so the crazy drunk guy is there instead of the skull ! Crazy drunk guy is sexy.

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by Marroe
Crazy drunk guy is sexy. girl(im assuming your a girl) got issues.

[Marroe]

Originally posted by IDrinkYourBlood
girl(im assuming your a girl) got issues. Didn't we already cover this?:D

[DraculaInDallas]

Originally posted by IDrinkYourBlood
So I'v been having these re-occuring dream of my gf in the cemetary in a crypt laying on a cement coffin only covered by a silk blanket. I come in wearing a dark suit and a pretty cool looking cape(who doesnt like capes?) and i start to kiss her and then i get to biusness on her. And i think this is the hottest thing ever. This isnt wrong is it?.......

Sounds like a real dead fuck to me....:p :D

[ShankS]

Originally posted by DraculaInDallas
Sounds like a real dead fuck to me....:p :D


lol deffo wont get turned down on that conquest! :D