Funny things youve done in a theater

[Vodstok]

Gren's species 2 talk reminded me of this. i try to be thoughtful of others in a theater, but when i saw Species 2, everything that could go wrong did. Plus, imo, the movie was terrible.

We were sitting there quietly waiting for the mvoie to start. it was 10 minutes late (i was there wityh 3 other people). The lights finally go down, the movie starts, then all of the sudden, a young couple walks in. on cue, the movie stops and the lights come back on.
I said "Wow, they must be royalty." Apparently, i said it loud enough for the whole theater to hear because the place erupted in laughter.

Later, when the main guy in the movie takes a pair of his new offspring to the barn where there are what looks like 30 others. As soon as they showed the kids, i leaned over to one of my freinds and said "Holy shit, what is he, Catholic?"

Again, the entire theater heard me and started laughing. apparently, they didnt care for it much either.

[Gren the cake]

ive done a buncha random stuff but its too long to explain and its like u had to be there

and thing is my shit isnt witty like urs.. its just me saying dumb crap :)

[urgeok]

when i was a kid ... popcorn came in boxes, not cups ... so they could be flattened and thrown like a frizbee (which is the exact reason they are in cups today.

I remember taking part in the 'mother of all popcorn box wars' at one show where at one point there were so many of these grease stained cardboard projectiles flying in every direction you couldnt see the screen.

It was the coolest thing i've ever seen.

[Vodstok]

Never got into a popcorn fight at a theater. I once got into a wet toilet paper and paper towel fight in a pool dressing room one time. it was a riot. I left and went swimming 3/4 of the way into it (i started it :D) and, as luck would have it, every single other kid involved got in trouble and was banned from the pool for a month. oops.



Another funny thing: I get giddy during action-packed or extremely violent scenes. So back whenGladiator hit theaters, i was htere at a matinee on opening day. there were maybe 10 people total in the theater, so there wasnt really any non-movie related noise going on.

Then, during the fight where Maximus wipes out 6 (ithink) other gladiators in under a minute, i was cackling. He sticks both swords into the last guy and turns around and says "Are you not entertained?!" I was howling. Then he cuts the gyuys head off and throws the sword, i had to lay sideways in my seat because my sides hurt.

I looked around after the scene was done and a nice young couple was looking at me like i hit babies with hammers for chuckles.

[urgeok]

that was like the time i saw 'Problem Child' at the theatre.
I know this is not a good film .. but for some reason or another i couldnt stop laughing .. i had tears streaming out of my eyes .. i went with 2 buddies .. one was like me .. we were both laughing uncontrollably .. while the other looked blankly at the screen ..along with the rest of the audience. People were walking out ..

man i wish they'd make movies that could do that to me again ..

the list is short ..
raising arizona ..
one part of Scary Movie 3
Noises Off ..
Naked Gun



Comedy is the hardest thing to do well ..I love the films where the director builds the to the point where you cant control yourself ... it's the only thing better than a good horror film ...

[Gren the cake]

OMG raising arizona.. where the guy is all 'loook at my young boy isnt he so smart' and hes scribbled 'fart' on the wall LOLOL

[urgeok]

and then he throws a handful of smarties at him 'heads up jr. !'

[Vodstok]

For some reason,t he funniest thing to me in Raising Arizona (outside of Tex Cobb killing bunnies and lizards...hehe) was Nicholas Cage running through a grocery store with a box of diapers under his arm getting chased by dogs... Cracks me up every time.

[Gren the cake]

i really need to watch that movie again

but right now i have ali G stuck in my head! never seent that shit before til last night.. GOOD SHIT!

BOOYA KASHA!

[Vodstok]

Originally posted by Gren the cake
i really need to watch that movie again

but right now i have ali G stuck in my head! never seent that shit before til last night.. GOOD SHIT!

BOOYA KASHA! I saww bits and pieces of that movie. I accidentally downloaded it while tryuing to get something else. iall i can remember is him walking in on two of his freinds buttfucking because they thought they were going to die and got curious....

[Death By Jell-O]

Originally posted by Vodstok
Gren's species 2 talk reminded me of this. i try to be thoughtful of others in a theater, but when i saw Species 2, everything that could go wrong did. Plus, imo, the movie was terrible.

We were sitting there quietly waiting for the mvoie to start. it was 10 minutes late (i was there wityh 3 other people). The lights finally go down, the movie starts, then all of the sudden, a young couple walks in. on cue, the movie stops and the lights come back on.
I said "Wow, they must be royalty." Apparently, i said it loud enough for the whole theater to hear because the place erupted in laughter.

Later, when the main guy in the movie takes a pair of his new offspring to the barn where there are what looks like 30 others. As soon as they showed the kids, i leaned over to one of my freinds and said "Holy shit, what is he, Catholic?"

Again, the entire theater heard me and started laughing. apparently, they didnt care for it much either.

with 3 other people? So the 4 of you was referred to as erupting with laughter? :D

[ShankS]

I'm always sensible when watching a film.

[Death By Jell-O]

I generally avoid going to the theater......Aside from the price gouging for the tickets, I have the propensity to fall asleep in theaters....I don't know what it is.....

[Vodstok]

Originally posted by Death By Jell-O
with 3 other people? So the 4 of you was referred to as erupting with laughter? :D Har-dee-har har..... I went with 3 other people, the theater itself was packed.

Wise acre.....:D

[IDrinkYourBlood]

whenever i go to a movie with my gf or a friend and its 10 minutes to showtime and such, ill say random things like "so my herpee's cleared up","good thing i took those laxitives befor we came here" or "whats that medicine called for my genital warts again?" haha good times.
I'v never been into a popcorn fight, but my friend and his cousin did once, during "Rollerball" man what a piece of shit movie.
As for laughing out load oncontrollable I'd say "Goldmember" got me going pretty hard. man that movies funny.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by IDrinkYourBlood
whenever i go to a movie with my gf or a friend and its 10 minutes to showtime and such, ill say random things like "so my herpee's cleared up","good thing i took those laxitives befor we came here" or "whats that medicine called for my genital warts again?" haha good times.
I'v never been into a popcorn fight, but my friend and his cousin did once, during "Rollerball" man what a piece of shit movie.
As for laughing out load oncontrollable I'd say "Goldmember" got me going pretty hard. man that movies funny.


same here re. Goldmember ...

'how about NO, you crazy Dutch Bastard'

and the urine sample scene .. christ that one makes me laugh every time..

[ShankS]

a mate went with his girl friend, he aksed her whether she wanted anything from the shop like hotdogs or nachos etc before the film started, and she didnt.

then 10 minutes into the film she moand she wanted some popcorn, he eventually got some for her and was pissed he'd missed 5 minutes of the film.

he had the tub thing over his lap and pierced a hold in the bottom and ripped it enough so he could fit his twanger through the hole.... he stopped eating the stuff but his girl friend carried on reaching into the tub, haha she got a fleshy surprise when the level went down.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by ShankS
a mate went with his girl friend, he aksed her whether she wanted anything from the shop like hotdogs or nachos etc before the film started, and she didnt.

then 10 minutes into the film she moand she wanted some popcorn, he eventually got some for her and was pissed he'd missed 5 minutes of the film.

he had the tub thing over his lap and pierced a hold in the bottom and ripped it enough so he could fit his twanger through the hole.... he stopped eating the stuff but his girl friend carried on reaching into the tub, haha she got a fleshy surprise when the level went down.


did you dream that after seeing the movie Diner ?? :)

[ShankS]

what movie?

[urgeok]

Diner ... Mickey Rourke did the exact same thing ...
on a bet with his buddies that he could get the 'cold' girl
to grab his member at the show.

They called it off because if she wasnt going for it on purpose - it didnt count..

[ShankS]

I've not seen the film, but he may have.

[allmykids]

When i was 17 i put 4 eggs in my purse. I was going to throw them from the top row but i guess the joke was on me. when i reached in my purse they where all broken!! LOL

[Gren the cake]

Originally posted by Vodstok
I saww bits and pieces of that movie. I accidentally downloaded it while tryuing to get something else. iall i can remember is him walking in on two of his freinds buttfucking because they thought they were going to die and got curious....

sounds about right! the ones i watched were from his show on HBO (did u know that stands for home box office I DID NOT KNOW THAT but it makes so much sense now cuz all they show is movies!)

anyway. he has 3 characters, a gangsta bling bling guy, a middle eastern, ande a gay dresser. funniest shit, cuz he'll go to legitimate events, or interview people (surgeon general, secretary of states both former of course, ralph nader) LOL and he'll say the stupidest crap. FUNNIEST SHIT. he does it with suc a straight face. neway, fnishing watching it tonight i think, as for the movie i dunno.

[1beastieibe]

I hate going to the movies now cause someone always ruins it by being an asshole, why do I wanna pay 8.50 to hear people say stupid things when IM trying to watch a movie. I also hate it when people bring their kids to PG 13 or R and they start crying or making baby noises. Like their baby's going to enjoy the movie.....if you cant afford a babysitter dont go!

[Marroe]

Last movie I went out to see was Darkness:rolleyes:. As soon as we walk up to the ticket guy, the girl I was with started rubbing her boobs and said "damn it's cold in here, my nipples are starched". Of course the ticket guy, being like 14 started to blush. Once it finally started , everytime the movie would get quiet the guy I was with yelled "RRRRRAAAAAHHHHHH TIMMY!!!" This started to get old after a while. My friends can never act right in public.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by Marroe
Last movie I went out to see was Darkness:rolleyes:. As soon as we walk up to the ticket guy, the girl I was with started rubbing her boobs and said "damn it's cold in here, my nipples are starched". Of course the ticket guy, being like 14 started to blush. Once it finally started , everytime the movie would get quiet the guy I was with yelled "RRRRRAAAAAHHHHHH TIMMY!!!" This started to get old after a while. My friends can never act right in public.

i would have appreciated the nipple thing, but i would have killed the mouthy guy ..

[Marroe]

Originally posted by urgeok
i would have appreciated the nipple thing, but i would have killed the mouthy guy .. That's funny, you have actually told me to kill him before when I posted that he "talked to gods" maybe I should look into it.

[IDrinkYourBlood]

Originally posted by 1beastieibe
I hate going to the movies now cause someone always ruins it by being an asshole, why do I wanna pay 8.50 to hear people say stupid things when IM trying to watch a movie. I also hate it when people bring their kids to PG 13 or R and they start crying or making baby noises. Like their baby's going to enjoy the movie.....if you cant afford a babysitter dont go! yes that is so very very true.

[knife_fight]

this isn't funny, but it's something stupid I did in a theatre once, and I regret it now:

in the small southern town where I went to college, there was nowhere that someone could go see a good movie. all that came to our town were action movies and teen comedies... until They built the new enormo-plex, which forced the old theatre to make a tough call: to either go out of business or become a "dollar movie." they went with B. but the main good thing about it was that they would get movies that the big theatre wouldn't get, like smaller horror movies and Woody Allen flicks. so it was fun to get all wasted and go pay a buck and sneak in some beers.

the problem with older theatres is just that: they're old. in other words, things don't work right. well, one night after a day of drinking, I had had enough. I got tired of, every time I went to the dollar movie, the sound messed up, or the film broke, or something stupid happened to where there were constant delays. so I thought it would be a good idea to throw some cups at the screen. so I threw a few cups. a few people got wet, but nothing else came of it. then I ran out of cups. what did I have left to throw??? beer bottles!!! so I threw a beer bottle, which smashed into shards of deadliness at the front of the theatre. I was just pulling back to toss my next Southpaw, when the lights came up and a Voice said, "please leave the theatre." there was no question who They were talking to. me and my friends skulked outta there like a dog who got caught shitting on the new carpet... afraid of an encounter with Johnny Law.

and, that was the end of it... or so I thought.

a few weeks later my buddy was reading an article in the newspaper which said the dollar movie was going out of business. when I asked him why, he said, "apparently some stupid bitch was walking around barefooted and cut her foot really bad on some glass. she sued the dollar movie and the dollar movie couldn't afford to pay, so they bankrupted!"

I felt terrible. I had single-handedly knocked out one of the few cool places to go in our small town.

[ShankS]

Originally posted by knife_fight
this isn't funny, but it's something stupid I did in a theatre once, and I regret it now:

in the small southern town where I went to college, there was nowhere that someone could go see a good movie. all that came to our town were action movies and teen comedies... ...



..................I felt terrible. I had single-handedly knocked out one of the few cool places to go in our small town.


everyone does bad things they regret... some worse than others. It's a shame you got drunk and wrecked something that was good for you and others.....wrong place at the wrong time. The trouble in general is, people get something good and it gets abused eventually.

[Vodstok]

The dipshit was in a THEATER with bare feet? Not only is that usually against the law, but there are far worse things than glass on your average theater floor.


The Timmy thing reminds me of when my wife and i went to see Return of the king. I cant remember what happened, but at one point near the beginning of the movie, a group of teenagers cheered, and everyone laughed (because it was inappropriate, and was pretty ironic at the time).

In true retard fashion, they took that to mean that they were hilariously funny comedian types, and continued to do it repeatedly for the rest of the movie. Around the 8th time, a bunch of us started telling them that it wasnt funny anymore.

My wife (being the peachy little darling she is, and knowing how awful it is for an attractive woman to insult you when you are in your teens) loudly stated that if they kept that up, their dates would never suck their dicks because they werent really that cool :)

I love her.

[urgeok]

we have a cool old rep theatre in Toronto i love (first saw Cemetary MAn there - midnight at halloween - years ago)

it was pretty shabby at one point and in need of big repairs .. lots of broken seats etc...

one night i was there watching a movie - before they fixed the joint up - and there was a big commotion coming from the right side of the theatre .. so we check it out .. and this big fucking raccoon comes lumbering through the seats ...people yelping and scrambling ...

pretty funny

I didnt do it - but still pretty funny :D

[Haphazard]

Me and my friend went to see a stupid-ass movie spur of the moment. I think it was a Segal movie of some sort.

Anyway, I have endless stories about theatre antics...but I'll just share this one.

Me and my friend were sitting just chatting before the movie started, I noticed out of the corner of my eye some chick's foot up on my arm rest. I was like...WTF??? lol. She kept it there throughout most of the movie. My friend and I kept laughing, then I said watch this.

I just started massaging this total stranger's foot...my friend could not stop laughing. Mind you, we have yet to even look back to see what she/they even look like, and I'm sitting here tickling her foot and massaging it.

Anyway, the movie ends...the lights come on. We calmly turn around to introduce ourselves...and it was like a big 'ol soccer mom! We just kept laughing and took the fuck off...fast!

[Angra]

Originally posted by Haphazard
Me and my friend went to see a stupid-ass movie spur of the moment. I think it was a Segal movie of some sort.

Anyway, I have endless stories about theatre antics...but I'll just share this one.

Me and my friend were sitting just chatting before the movie started, I noticed out of the corner of my eye some chick's foot up on my arm rest. I was like...WTF??? lol. She kept it there throughout most of the movie. My friend and I kept laughing, then I said watch this.

I just started massaging this total stranger's foot...my friend could not stop laughing. Mind you, we have yet to even look back to see what she/they even look like, and I'm sitting here tickling her foot and massaging it.

Anyway, the movie ends...the lights come on. We calmly turn around to introduce ourselves...and it was like a big 'ol soccer mom! We just kept laughing and took the fuck off...fast!

Good thing you didn´t lick it then....

[Kitty]

well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary!

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary!


Didn´t get it?? :confused:

[Marroe]

Originally posted by Haphazard
Me and my friend went to see a stupid-ass movie spur of the moment. I think it was a Segal movie of some sort.

Anyway, I have endless stories about theatre antics...but I'll just share this one.

Me and my friend were sitting just chatting before the movie started, I noticed out of the corner of my eye some chick's foot up on my arm rest. I was like...WTF??? lol. She kept it there throughout most of the movie. My friend and I kept laughing, then I said watch this.

I just started massaging this total stranger's foot...my friend could not stop laughing. Mind you, we have yet to even look back to see what she/they even look like, and I'm sitting here tickling her foot and massaging it.

Anyway, the movie ends...the lights come on. We calmly turn around to introduce ourselves...and it was like a big 'ol soccer mom! We just kept laughing and took the fuck off...fast! Hahaha, I bet you got lucky after that, huh?;)

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary!

You have to make a short story long. ;) L

[Marroe]

Originally posted by Kitty
well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary! Thats what you get for being rude.

[Kitty]

yea i kno but you should have seen this look they gave me they looked like they steeped in dog caca

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
yea i kno but you should have seen this look they gave me they looked like they steeped in dog caca

LOL :p

[Haphazard]

Originally posted by Kitty
well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary!

Wait...what was the point of this story?????

The fact that you were sitting in a "threader??"

:confused:

[Haphazard]

Originally posted by Marroe
Hahaha, I bet you got lucky after that, huh?;)

That's EXACTLY what I/we were thinking! After we turned around...man...the looks on our faces were like straight out of a sit-com or something.

lol

[Marroe]

Originally posted by Haphazard
That's EXACTLY what I/we were thinking! After we turned around...man...the looks on our faces were like straight out of a sit-com or something.

lol I'm gonna start proppin my lil tootsies up at the 'threader' Maybe I can get a rub down too. :)

[Kitty]

Originally posted by Angra
LOL :p

nothing really just to prove a point and that would be never call a asian ppl black or pay the concequences

[Angra]

Originally posted by Marroe
I'm gonna start proppin my lil tootsies up at the 'threader' Maybe I can get a rub down too. :)

Just make sure to wash them first. ;) :(

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
nothing really just to prove a point and that would be never call a asian ppl black or pay the concequences

ppl??:confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused:

[Kitty]

have you ever seen a person w/ unwashed toes its pritty bad

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
have you ever seen a person w/ unwashed toes its pritty bad

Seen or smelled?

[Kitty]

okay ppl-people
both:mad: EWWWWWWWW

[Michaels Shape]

This is funny....I got head! :D :p ;) :)

[Kitty]

do what?

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
okay ppl-people
both:mad: EWWWWWWWW


Yes, my own. :mad: LMGO

PPL????? What the FUCK are you talking about, girl?:confused: :mad:

[Kitty]

ppl stands for people

[Angra]

Originally posted by Kitty
ppl stands for people

Aaaha, i see. You´re a lazy girl. ;) L

[Kitty]

yea i kno

[Angra]

Originally posted by Michaels Shape
This is funny....I got head! :D :p ;) :)


Head??? By a girl? ;)

[EXTR3MIST]

I'm ashamed to say what I done, but let's just say Angry Anal #26 was playing at the time.

Ugh ugh ugh!

[Kitty]

OMG who did you shot and why?

[Marroe]

Originally posted by Kitty
OMG who did you shot and why? He shot himself in the eye.

[EXTR3MIST]

You crack me up.

I couldn't come up with a better cross-purpose if I tried.

[juanhacko]

Do porn flix count?--oh well, I won't go there.

I couldn't stay awake thru "Queen of the Damned"--I kept nodding off in the seat.

We used to go to the balcony and smoke--just cigarettes--it was allowed at the time.

When I was 16 we got harrassed by the cops for stopping on a side road by a drive-in movie which was showing porn.

We also used to sneek in drive-in movies in the car trunk.

[Marroe]

Originally posted by juanhacko
Do porn flix count?--oh well, I won't go there.

I couldn't stay awake thru "Queen of the Damned"--I kept nodding off in the seat.

We used to go to the balcony and smoke--just cigarettes--it was allowed at the time.

When I was 16 we got harrassed by the cops for stopping on a side road by a drive-in movie which was showing porn.

We also used to sneek in drive-in movies in the car trunk. They showed porn at drive ins??!!!!!???!!!!! Fucking awesome. I bet you didn't wanna look in anyones cars,lol.

[knife_fight]

around here, before all the drive-ins closed down, they all turned into XXX theatres for a little while. it was weird.

and yes, to reply to Vodstok, some idiot little girl was running around the theatre without her shoes on.

[urgeok]

Originally posted by Kitty
well thats just stupid

any way



i was sitting in a threader w/ my best friend and she dared me to call this asian ppl black well to make a long story short i got chased in to a stall in the Girls bath room Very Scary!



i wish you'd just fucking leave for good

[Gren the cake]

OMG urge is being mean!!

RARwrwrRWRWRR

[urgeok]

Originally posted by Gren the cake
OMG urge is being mean!!

RARwrwrRWRWRR

well give me a break ...

stupid and racist ...


i cant fucking take it anymore

[Gren the cake]

i saw the stupid but mustve missed the racist

[AUSTIN316426808]

the most i've ever gotten into in a theater were a few popcorn fights while on field trips.