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View Full Version : Why do I do It??... ranting at myself.


ShankS
10-20-2004, 06:42 PM
Went out for a few beers last night, first had to dump my car round a friends house, then we walked and got the bus to the pub.

Met quite a few people and some I hadnt seen in a while, drank a few beers. Actualy most of it was lager, and I regret it now cos lager gives me a stinking headache the next day no mater how small amount I drink. I normally drink beer. Anyway, we split up and a few of us went onto another pub to play pool.

We got kicked out the pub around 11:30 ish and a few of us were going back to a mates house.... I had to anyway to sober up, cos I couldnt drive home. They had weed, and since I quit that stuff a long time ago I wasnt gona smoke it. Then I thought I'm gona be round there, they're gona be getting stoned and I'd have to sit there with this stinking headache getting worse and worse.

So stupidly I said lets get some coke, and since I was merry, not drunk, and hadnt had any for at least 5 or 6 years I had this absolutely goddamn fucking stupid idea to get some. They agreed and wanted some aswell. Someone rang and within 15 minutes we got hold of some.

As you might guess, I didnt get in till 8:45 this morning and ended up sleeping all day and most of the evening, and now it's 3:11am Thursday morning and I'm bloody awake.

I'm regretting it now, spent most of the night and morning playing Xbox, watching a couple of films which was good I guess, and in between talking lots of crap, ......since having this absolutely stupid idea, and the fact that I should have stopped having stupid spontaneous fuckedup ideas years ago...... I guess that idiot within me just cant be tamed, even at my age, and I let it get the better of me sometimes.

And another thing I get annoyed sometimes with myself is the fact that, I have different groups of friends, the younger ones in their 20s are the ones I tend to do stupid things with, and another group of friends, who are similar age or older, I act my age with and If I go out with them, I'd never even dream of doing coke or anything like that, and neither would they

I know to you guys, going by the way I can be here, and my avatar and whatnot, does give the impression that I'm the sort of guy who lives in a bar drinking all day.... For me it's a sort of a release from normality and I can come here and mess about and have some fun with you guys. I know I used to drink quite a bit when I was younger... ended up in casualty/ER 3 or 4 times through drinking too much, but never through taking drugs, I guess I knew my limits with that stuff, but ever since a couple of very serious occassions involving me, a couple of other male and female friends, whome I no longer associate with... I stopped doing 'recreational' drugs and told myself I'd never touch them again about 6 years ago.

It just pisses me off that sometimes on rare occassions now, I get stupid and I change the way I would normally be, and that is reasonably sensible, considering I was brought up well and 'would' say that I have repectable morals. I just hate regret because it makes me feel bad for a while afterwards.

FairyKorpes
10-20-2004, 06:59 PM
Well i for one talking out my ass seeing as how i don't know you. If doing it every 5 or 6 years is all you do then you're doing a pretty good fuckin' job. Plus, it reminds you as to WHY? you haven't done it in so many years. Reality check if you will. Don't be so down on yourself, it's good to revert back at times, keeps ya in check for the rest of it.

kpropain
10-20-2004, 07:00 PM
Shanks I can relate to practically everything in your post...

I tend to do stupid shit like that myself man...And I end up feeling the exact same way you do..

Hate_Breeder
10-20-2004, 07:01 PM
Originally posted by kpropain
Shanks I can relate to practically everything in your post...

I tend to do stupid shit like that myself man...And I end up feeling the exact same way you do..

Huh? *Gasp*

Tubalcain
10-20-2004, 07:37 PM
dude, i can feel your pain. i do the same thing. i drink socially, and go for years at a time without doing any recreational drugs, but then i'll see some friends, and before i know it, im doing something that i wish i hadnt done. but, you know, fuck it. there is nothing you can do about it now. just try to hold out till next time. just dont get busted, because that really would suck.

DaBroMain
10-20-2004, 08:38 PM
You da man shanks.....And remember if you get fucked up and have a lil fun (cuz thats all it is) ....remember that it is all in fun.....:D :D :D

ShankS
10-21-2004, 12:03 AM
my head still feels like my nose has been shot to pieces and it's gona fall off..... I'm sure it didnt used to feel like that years ago.

I think a nice detox is in order today, loads of fruit and a couple of pints of orange juice.

As for a next time, well that all depends on whether I mix with a certain group or not. I dont find it dificult staying away so thats good.

DraculaInDallas
10-21-2004, 12:08 AM
just be careful out there............

bloodrayne
10-21-2004, 02:30 AM
Aww Shanks...Don't feel bad, Sweetheart...Really, I did something SERIOUSLY fucked up Monday night...It was all cool at the time, but when the moment was over (and I was sober), it sucked major ass...Guilt...Regret...And more than a little loss of respect for myself...BUT, I MORE than made up for it, tonight...Sooo...Live...Learn...And move on to bigger, better things...We all trip and stumble from time to time, but we still know who and what we are, when it's all said and done

Steve_Hutchison
10-21-2004, 03:40 AM
Haven't done shrooms in almost 2 years now. But everytime someone brings up the subject, I get shivers. That's the only thought that makes me shiver on cue.

Vodstok
10-21-2004, 03:45 AM
The worst i ever did was pot, once, and it made me puke (plus it tasted like shit...), so i cant relate in that department,but i had some bouts just before my wedding for a bout 2 weeks where my drinking got out of control (so the whole forced-sobriety thing is a bit of a relief). in 2 weeks, i went through a bottle of jack daniels, a bottle of sauza tequila, a LARGE bottle of J&B rare, and more beer than ican count. i was sloshed 5 nights out of the week.

Every fucking morning i woke up with a massive headache. Every morning i said "i wont be doing that again soon". the that night, i would have a beer with a booze chaser, then two chasers, then another beer. more booze, next thing i know, im slurring my speech and stumbling over the coffee table.

I kept thinking "I left this shit behind when iwas 22, didnt i?"

And i dont even have any freinds pointing me in the wrong direction.

We all trip sometimes. Just learn from it. (how fucking cliche is that?......)

bloodrayne
10-21-2004, 03:50 AM
Originally posted by Vodstok
We all trip sometimes. Just learn from it. (how fucking cliche is that?......) LOL...Not any worse than mine....Anyway, if it wasn't TRUE, it wouldn't be repeated over and over again, and therefore would not BE cliche...So...Yeah...lol

Vodstok
10-21-2004, 04:14 AM
here, lets make this cliche:

Join my forum, you bastards :) (http://scaredyet.net/forum/index.php) New article on Diseases coming soon, maybe even later today.....



I wonder how much of this you guys will take before you lynch me :D


The irony is, once this month is over, i plan on getting HAMMERED, even though i know i will end up regretting it :rolleyes:

GorePhobia
10-21-2004, 05:36 AM
my brother used to be the same way. He worked at a bar so he would drink untill 4 am do coke then but up till 9 am then sleep untill 5:30 when he had to work at 5 and then it would repeat all over again....sad honestly.....but you just have to try hard to break the habit

GoRe

ShankS
10-21-2004, 11:06 AM
Originally posted by Vodstok
here, lets make this cliche:

Join my forum, you bastards :) (http://scaredyet.net/forum/index.php) New article on Diseases coming soon, maybe even later today.....



I wonder how much of this you guys will take before you lynch me :D


The irony is, once this month is over, i plan on getting HAMMERED, even though i know i will end up regretting it :rolleyes:

I know, thats the sad thing about drinking, you go on a binge and enjoy it while it's happening, then the nextday when you're ill and thinking why the hell did I do that last night........ a few days down the road and you're back in the boozer repeating the whole thing. Dont we ever learn lol

sometimes though, you just think what the hell, I'm gona get drunk, cos the 'being drunk' part of it's fun, but the aftereffects are shit, but they take second place and you forget about that as soon as the word alcohol is mentioned.

FairyKorpes
10-21-2004, 11:09 AM
If your prone to hangovers, they say to have a glass of water for each drink you have. Or when you wake up take some tylenol and Gatorade (electrolites) lol.

ShankS
10-21-2004, 11:15 AM
Im ok if I stick to Beer and not Lager, something in any type of larger gives me a bad headache, and aslong as I control myself and stear clear of the spirits I should be ok, but keeping away from the whisky can be difficult when the bottle staring you in the face from behind the bar.

I find that a couple of bannanas and a pint of orange juice settles my stomach

Vodstok
10-21-2004, 11:47 AM
Shit, double post, ignore. the next one has better spelling :rolleyes:

Vodstok
10-21-2004, 11:48 AM
I wish i knew what the concoction was, but the guy my freinds and i stayed with when we went to mardi gras had a cocktail of suplements and a super-vitamin cool-aid he had us drink every day before going out. We would get completely shitfaced and wake up the next day without so much as a dry feeling in our throats.

Arioch
10-21-2004, 02:30 PM
Don't worry about it shank, i don't know how many people on here can relate, but i too have had the bouts with Coke and its never pleasant....

But this too can be overcome.....alcohol is nothing....just keep off the hardcore stuff....and watch your ass around alcohol....one hurdle at a time....

DraculaInDallas
10-21-2004, 06:45 PM
Originally posted by Vodstok
here, lets make this cliche:

Join my forum, you bastards :) (http://scaredyet.net/forum/index.php) New article on Diseases coming soon, maybe even later today.....



I wonder how much of this you guys will take before you lynch me :D


The irony is, once this month is over, i plan on getting HAMMERED, even though i know i will end up regretting it :rolleyes:

LMAO!!!!!!! :D

newb
10-21-2004, 06:57 PM
I myself am strictly a beer guy. Used to do shots once in a while but learnt my lesson after a few toilet hugging sessions.

mothermold
10-21-2004, 10:45 PM
Originally posted by ShankS
I'm the sort of guy who lives in a bar drinking all day

....you nailed it,my ideal job!one day when i die and go to heaven and meet GOD(right before he asks me "what the fuck are you doing here?")i'm gonna ask if i can go back as Shanks.

honestly though,i can relate...having been there.

....in the end might i suggest a song by Johnny Cash that really seems to put "that" feeling into words."Sunday mourning coming down."

ShankS
10-21-2004, 10:54 PM
ha ha ......comming down.... ah the memories, the twitching and jaw chattering :D I used to hate em.