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"Untitiled" Screenplay For Legion Films
I posted the beginning of this in another forum but i suspect this is better. It's as yet to be titled short horror script that i'm writing for Legion Films. This post contains the beginning that was posted in the other forum as well as several more pages. Feedback is always appreciated.
- Copyright 2004-2006 Arthur R. Phillips - FADE IN: EXT. ROAD - NIGHT We are paved road with a few houses scattered here and there along it's length. Two hitch-hikers are standing along the side of the road, sharing a smoke and discussing the general absence of a ride. Perhaps one or two vehicles go by but nobody is interested in stopping. The hitch-hikers have with them some basic camping gear that's strapped to their backs. TOM Why not ? MICHAEL I'm not trudging back across no goddamn field to sleep in a crackhouse, I mean did you see that place ? TOM We don't have to go inside, we can sleep out in the field MICHAEL And get shot by some drunken rednecks no thank you TOM Don't be a pussy MICHAEL Excuse me ? TOM Don't be a fucking pussy, besides, my feet are killing me MICHAEL tosses the cigarette into a ditch and looks around. He's hoping someone will still stop. TOM(CONT) Well ? MICHAEL Fine, we'll go back to Bates Motel, but if some guy with a chainsaw pops out of the woods i'm leaving your ass there TOM Fine MICHAEL (resigned) Let's go EXT. FIELD - MOMENTS LATER MICHAEL and TOM are strolling across the field. MICHAEL is particularly nervous but TOM seems to see this as an adventure of sorts. MICHAEL I don't like this TOM You sound like my ex MICHAEL During sex right ? TOM Asshole, you've watched one too many of those stupid horror movies that's your problem MICHAEL Horror movies can teach us a lot TOM Like what ? MICHAEL Like don't go into a dark field at night without a machete TOM I have a lighter MICHAEL Well that's great if we wanna singe the killers eyebrows TOM How about you stop whining (pointing) There's the house MICHAEL I thought we weren't going in ? TOM We're not, we're camping outside MICHAEL drops his stuff. MICHAEL Fine, we stop here TOM (dropping his pack) You know this little road trip was your idea not mine MICHAEL unrolls a sleeping bag, and flops down, lighting another cigarette. TOM stands there looking around. MICHAEL Looking for the axe wielding psycho ? TOM I heard something MICHAEL Probably a bear TOM A bear in this area ? MICHAEL Well okay, a deer ? TOM I think it came from the house MICHAEL Well maybe, big deal, I'm sure whatever it is doesn't need us poking our noses around TOM I'm gonna go check it out (beat) You coming ? MICHAEL Fuck no TOM Oh c'mon for God sake MICHAEL No TOM Fine, you wait here and wait for the bears and the deer TOM walks off whistling. MICHAEL Asshole MICHAEL opens his sleeping bag and starts searching for something in his knapsack. INT. PORCH - MOMENTS LATER TOM is standing on the porch of the dilapidated house. TOM Trick or treat ! Silence. TOM peers in to where the front door should be. TOM (to MICHAEL) Empty ! MICHAEL So's your head ! TOM turns his attention back to the house. He enters and we go to ... INT. HALLWAY A very long hallways with rooms on either side. The hallway goes all the way to the backdoor. TOM Jesus (to MICHAEL) Hey you should come take a look at this ! MICHAEL(OS) Like hell ! TOM continues walking and turns left into ... INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS Red cabinets line the walls and an old stove is pulled out from the wall. TOM Oh this is seriously creepy TOM slowly approaches one of the cupboards and a power tool falls from it. TOM jumps. TOM(CONT) Jesus TOM turns back towards the kitchen door and goes back out into the ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM looks up and down the hallway and hears something. TOM Hello ? (beat) Anybody home ? TOM moves toward ... INT. THE SHIRT ROOM - CONTINUOUS Some dress shirts are hanging on a line and the floor is cluttered with what appears to be fur. TOM approaches the shirts and runs a finger along them. The sound again. TOM turns. TOM Michael ?! No reply. TOM moves into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS The hallway. TOM (and the audience) get the idea that someone or something just ducked into one of the room near the back of the house. TOM (loudly but not yelling) Michael ! (beat) Whoever this is come out from where you are ! Silence. TOM looks up and down the hallway again. He moves down the hallway and turns into ... INT. BEE ROOM - CONTINUOUS There's a small cabinet in the room as well as an abundance of wasps nests, and honey combs. TOM I don't like this The sound again. TOM is becoming agitated. He moves back into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM Who the fuck's in here ?! (beat) Michael ?! (beat) Micheal answer me ! Silence. TOM holds his hand to his head. As he does this he backs into ... INT. EMPTY ROOM - CONTINUOUS He looks around. One door leads to the bee room and the other back to the hallway. TOM Something smells like shit TOM looks around the room and goes back into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS ... the hallway and heads directly towards the batroom. The toilet is filled with a red, viscous fluid. TOM Goddamn Someone walks past him down the hall. Is it Michael ?. TOM doesn't notice. He moves from the bathroom to ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS He walks toward the back of the house and into ... INT. BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS What appears to possibly be a bedroom. The sound of a small appliance of some sort starting up can be heard somewhere in the house. TOM freezes. He goes to the bedroom door and peers down either end of the hallway. TOM Michael this isn't funny The appliance is still buzzing. He moves into the ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS ... and proceeds directly to the kitchen. INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM steps into the kitchen. An electric knife is lying on the floor. It's running. TOM What the ? Someone moves down the hallway behind TOM. He turns. TOM(CONT) Who's there ? (beat) Michael you asshole this isn't funny ! He turns back towards the buzzing knife, looks around, goes over, and picks it up carefully. He throws it angrily to stop it. It crashes into the wall and dies. MICHAEL appears behind him. MICHAEL What's up ? TOM turns with a start. TOM Jesus Christ don't sneak up on me like that ? MICHAEL Sounded like you were pitching a fit TOM Someone's in this house MICHAEL What ? TOM Someone's here MICHAEL Who ? TOM I don't know who MICHAEL Your imagination is running away with you, this place is dead TOM I saw something MICHAEL Something ? TOM Yes MICHAEL What was it ? TOM Somebody MICHAEL Alright now you're not making sense TOM Someone came in here and turned on an electric knife and left it on the floor MICHAEL What ? TOM I came in here, and I opened one of the cupboards and a knife fell out, I left it where it was, I went into another room, and ... and it came on, I came back here and it was lying on the floor running MICHAEL You probably jarred something when it fell on the floor in the first place TOM I don't think so MICHAEL Tom this house is empty TOM Well then you go take a look, i'm staying right here MICHAEL You know Tom you don't look well TOM I'm just starting to think that maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all (beat) I'll stay here, you go look in the other rooms, watch out for bees MICHAEL Bees ? TOM Yes MICHAEL Alright then, you wait here, Jesus MICHAEL leaves the kitchen. TOM I don't think Jesus has anything to do with this place INT. HALLWAY - MOMENTS LATER MICHAEL is walking slowly up the hallway, peering into rooms. He enters the ... INT. BEE ROOM - CONTINUOUS MICHAEL (shouting) Hey Tom ? TOM(OS) What ? MICHAEL Found some bees ! TOM(OS) What ?! MICHAEL I'm in the ... uh ... bee room ! (beat) Don't tell me you're scared of bees ! TOM(OS) (shouting) I don't think we should be shouting MICHAEL (shouting) I think you're crackers ! INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM is looking around the kitchen. TOM (loudly) Hey Michael ? No response. TOM(CONT) (louder) Mike ?! No response. ---TO BE CONTINUED--- Enjoy :) HodderFan2004 |
#2
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Awesome so far, dude. I like it a lot.
Not sure how we'd do the bee room, though. The room has a few randomly placed wasp/bee nests, but they seem to have been vacated long ago. |
#3
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Interesting story. I like it. :)
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#4
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Script Continued.
Here's a little more. Of course I'm going to stop short of the ending hehehe. And thanks for the comments !
- INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM is looking around the kitchen. TOM (loudly) Hey Michael ? No response. TOM(CONT) (louder) Mike ?! No response. TOM(CONT) Answer me ! No response. TOM takes another look around the kitchen. TOM(CONT) Mike !? No response. TOM angrily goes out into the ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM looks up and down the hallway. TOM Mike ! No response. TOM(CONT) This is really not funny ! TOM heads toward the ... INT. BEE ROOM - CONTINUOUS MICHAEL is not there. TOM looks around. TOM (panic) Mike ! Someone walks past the door. TOM turns. He goes to the ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM looks around. TOM What the hell ? MICHEAL is suddenly behind TOM. MICHAEL Boo ! TOM turns and punches MICHAEL in the face. MICHAEL(CONT) What the fuck was that for !? TOM I told you not to sneak up on me, look we better leave this house MICHAEL You didn't have to hit me, asshole TOM I'm leaving MICHAEL Don't you want to take a look around ? TOM I don't think so MICHAEL You're really scared aren't you ? TOM (lying) No MICHAEL Bullshit, look I'm gonna take another look around, this place is definately creepy TOM Something bad happened here MICHAEL Yeah you punched me in the face TOM There's blood in the toilet MICHAEL What ? TOM There's blood in the toilet, and I think one or two body parts MICHAEL Body parts ? TOM Go look for yourself MICHAEL Wait here TOM I'm not moving MICHAEL goes into the bathroom. MICHAEL(OS) Jesus TOM See Silence. TOM(CONT) C'mon let's get the hell out of here Silence. TOM(CONT) C'mon asshead I ain't got all day Silence. TOM goes to the bathrroom door. It's empty. TOM(CONT) What ... TOM cannot believe what he's seeing. TOM(CONT) Oh this is bad TOM turns and suddenly he's ... INT. BEE ROOM - CONTINUOUS In the bee room. He looks around. TOM God (beat) What is this place Someone walks behind him, down the hall. TOM immediately follows to ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS Empty. TOM Oh God what's happening The sound of an electric knife in another room. TOM jerks around. TOM(CONT) (rage/panic) Who's there ?! TOM is trying to regain his composure. He's terrified but trying to hold everything together. TOM(CONT) Gotta find Mike, gotta find Mike, okay, um, okay this isn't happening it really isn't TOM looks around and heads toward the kitchen. INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS The knife is sitting on the floor, where it was before. Running. TOM Okay then (beat) Mike ?! ... Mike answer me goddamn it ! Silence. TOM(CONT) Walk out, walk out of the house, leave the house, don't turn around, Michael wants to play goddamn games, fine he can stay here TOM leaves the kitchen but he's suddenly ... INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS Entering the kitchen. TOM is knocked off his feet by complete shock. He looks around in terror. MICHAEL calls from another room. MICHAEL(OS) Hey Tom !? TOM (standing quickly) Mike ?! MICHAEL(OS) Where the hell are you ?! TOM (shaky) I'm in the kitchen INT. THE SHIRT ROOM - CONTINUOUS MICHAEL standing there, studying everything. MICHAEL Look I think we better get out of here ! TOM(OS) I can't ! MICHAEL What ?! INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM (not sure what to say or do) Come to the kitchen ! Silence. TOM(CONT) Michael ! Silence. INT. THE SHIRT ROOM - CONTINUOUS MICHAEL (to himself) We really shouldn't be yelling (beat) There's someone in the house TOM(OS) Michael ! MICHAEL (screaming) What ?! TOM(OS) Who's in here with us ?! MICHAEL I don't know ! (softly) But we're not getting out alive ... that's for damn sure INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM is looking around. TOM Michael !? MICHAEL(OS) What ?! TOM I'm gonna try and leave the kitchen again !?, go to the hallway MICHAEL(OS) What do you mean you're going to try and leave the kitchen again ?!, what's happening ?! TOM (quietly) Fucked if i know TOM looks at the kitchen door and barges right through it into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM (relief) Thank God, Mike ? No response. TOM(CONT) Mike where are you ? No response. TOM(CONT) Look asshole this isn't funny, answer me ! No response. TOM(CONT) (quietly to himself) What room did he say he was in ?, uhm, the bee room, i'll try the bee room INT. BEE ROOM - MOMENTS LATER TOM enters the empty bee room. He walks in and turns around. TOM Mike ?! No response. INT. HALLWAY - MOMENTS LATER TOM steps into the hallway and looks across it's length. TOM Mike ?! No response. TOM(CONT) What the hell is happening, Jesus (beat) (screaming) MIKE ?! No response. INT. THE SHIRT ROOM - MOMENTS LATER TOM moves into the shirt room. Empty. INT. BATHROOM - MOMENTS LATER TOM peers into the bathroom. Nothing. INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS TOM I'm getting the hell outta here TOM marches toward the porch and goes right to ... INT. THE SHIRT ROOM - CONTINUOUS TOM looks around and a strangled sob of anguish escapes his thraot. He's finally starting to actually lose it. TOM GOD ! (beat) MIKE !?!?!!?, MIKE !?!?!!? Silence. Someone walks behind him in the hall. He turns. TOM(CONT) (crazed) Who's there ?! TOM roars into the ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS Empty. TOM looks up and down the empty hallway. He's manic now. TOM (quietly) The back door TOM heads for the back door and promptly enters ... INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS TOM is shocked. TOM No !!!!, let us out !!!!, let us out !!!!! He rips off his backpack and begins to violently beat at the cupboards. As he does this he makes repeated demands to be let out. He continues assaulting the cupboard until he exhausts himself and falls to his knees. TOM(CONT) (panting) When the son of a bitch, who's keeping us here, i'm gonna cut his goddamn throat Someone walks down the hall. TOM looks up. It's a giant hulk of a man in tattered clothes. TOM is not even sure if it is a man. He's too scared to move despite his words. MICHAEL(OS) Tom ! TOM looks around. He can no longer believe his eyes or ears. He's not sure if that's Michael now at all despite the fact that it's obviously his voice. MICHAEL(CONT)(OS) Tom !!, where are you ?! TOM M-Michael ?! MICHAEL(OS) Where are you ?! TOM looks around. TOM I-i ... I'm in the kitchen ! No more response. TOM Mike !? .... Goddamnit answer me ! MICHAEL(OS) Help me ! TOM moves before thinking. He roars into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS He looks around. TOM Where are you ?! No response. TOM(CONT) Goddamnit where are you ?! No response. A girl appears in the doorway. MARY-BETH Can i help you with somthing ? TOM turns. Is the girl really there ?. TOM Who are you ? MARY-BETH Well Jesus you look like freshly warmed death TOM What did you do with Michael ? MARY-BETH I haven't the foggiest idea what you're talking about, who's Michael TOM Who lives here ?, who lives in this house, answer me MARY-BETH You ask a lot of questions TOM Answer me MARY-BETH Sometimes, that's no good Close on TOM. Then back to the doorway. The girl is gone. TOM races to the front door but ... --To Be Continued-- Enjoy ! HodderFan2004 |
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hodderfan thats really good man keep it up:D
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"dogs more like pussies ahhhh" terry from dog soldiers^^^^^^^^^ check out my websit and join my forum!!! the link is: www.freewebs.com/horrorflicks/ |
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I don't feel like I can read fast enough. It's really great. Good Job.
Last edited by Aasiyan; 01-05-2004 at 01:28 PM. |
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Thanks for the comments. Here's a little more. And only if you're nice to me will i post what happens at the end lol.
- TOM races to the front door but ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS ... he's suddenly running through the back door and is now standing where he was during the conversation with the mystery girl. MICHAEL(OS) Tom !? TOM jumps. MICHAEL(CONT)(OS) I'm hurt bad ! TOM (snapping) You're not Michael you rotten fucking son of a bitch ! MICHAEL(OS) Help me TOM covers his ears. TOM No, no no no no nononononono!!!!!!!! He falls to his knees. The killer is standing in front of him. TOM looks up. He's speechless. The dishelved maniac stares down at him. TOM Wha ... wha ... who TOM stands. He begins to back into the kitchen. INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS The killer follows calmly. TOM(CONT) Stay the fuck away from me TOM grabs his backpack where he dropped it early and in a rage begins to beat on the maniac that stands before him. He's pounding at him, grunting in a crazed rage. TOM(CONT) DIE ... YOU ... SON OF A BITCH !!!! The maniac falls and TOM collapses on the floor exhausted. He throws his backpack away. He looks at the killer. It's MICHAEL. He's bleeding profusely from the head. TOM(CONT) No ... no TOM lunges at his friend and shakes him. TOM(CONT) Michael !!! ... Michael wake up !!! No response. TOM(CONT) Oh God I killed him TOM stands and backs into ... INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS ... the killer. Who's now standing in the hallway. TOM turns. TOM Who are you The killer reaches for TOM who moves out of the way. TOM(CONT) Stay there, answer my question you son of a bitch ... who are you ? The killer stands there. TOM(CONT) Answer me .... answer me The killer moves toward TOM again. TOM backs away further. TOM(CONT) You made me kill Michael (beat) You made me kill my best friend The killer takes another step closer. TOM(CONT) What is this place, who the hell are you ? TOM backs further down the hall. TOM(CONT) Answer me you cocksucker TOM backs all the way up into ... --To Be Continued -- maybe :P HodderFan2004 |
#8
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This script is good but how long is the movie going to be? doesn't seem too long, I know it's not over yet but it seems like it's over soon. I suppose when filming there is usually bits in the movie where noone talks for a while so that would add time.
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It's made to be a short. I'll probably edit it to 24 minutes.
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#10
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Thats cool then, Very interesting.
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