#381
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Monty Pythons Holy Grail
1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Who goes there? King Arthur: It is I, Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, Sovereign of all England! 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Pull the other one! King Arthur: I am, and this is my trusty servant Patsy. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with your lord and master. 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? Ridden on a horse? King Arthur: Yes! 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You're using coconuts! King Arthur: What? 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together. King Arthur: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Mercia, through... 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Where'd you get the coconuts? King Arthur: We found them. 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Found them? In Mercia? The coconut's tropical! King Arthur: What do you mean? 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Well, this is a temperate zone King Arthur: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land? 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? King Arthur: Not at all. They could be carried. 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: What? A swallow carrying a coconut? King Arthur: It could grip it by the husk! 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut. King Arthur: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here? 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right? King Arthur: Please! 1st soldier with a keen interest in birds: Am I right? I know its more of a passage than a quote but I love this bit, especially when he asks if coconuts migrate!
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Battle Royalty, 2009 @Wolf_Scousemac Last edited by scouse mac; 04-09-2006 at 04:27 AM. |
#382
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This is from Blazing Saddles. It's one of my favorite songs.
As sung by the late great Madeline Kahn: I'm Tired Here I stand, the goddess of Desire, set men on fire, I have this power, morning noon and night it's drink and dancing, some quick romancing, and then a quick shower, stage door johnnies always surround me, they always hound me, with one request, who can satisfy their lustful habits, I'm not a rabbit! I need some rest! I'm tired, sick and tired of love, I've had my fill of love, from below and above, tired, tired of being admired, tired of love uninspired, let's face it, I'm tired! I've been with 1000's of men, again and again, they promise the moon, they always coming and going, going and coming, and always too soon! Right girls? I'm tired, tired of playing the game, ain't it a crying shame? I'm so tired, God dammit I'm tired! Hello cowboy, what's your name? Tex 'mam Tex 'mam ? Tell me Tex'mam, are you in show business? No We'll then why don't you get your freaking feet off here La ha Ah ha he hu... Hello handsome, is that a 10 gallon hat? Or are you just enjoying the show? Ah ha ah... Oh miss lilly, oh my laby, oh my pussy cat, put it there baby, put it... ohhhhh I'm tired, tired of playing the game, ain't it a crying shame, I'm so tired [soldiers:] she's tired -she's tired sick and tired of love -give her a break she's had her fill of love -she's not a snake from bellow and above -can't you see she's sick? tired -she's bushed tired of being admired -let her alone tired of love uninspired -get off the phone she's tired -don't you know she's pooped? I've been with 1000's of men, again and again, they sing the same toon, the start with Byron and Shelly, and jump on your belly, and bust your ballon! aye! tired, tired of playing the game, ain't it a freakin shame, I'm so... let's face it, everything below the waste is kapput!
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By the time you're twenty-five they will say you've gone and blown it. By the time you're thirty-five I must confide you will have blown them all |
#383
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Re: Quote
Quote:
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"There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." - Friedrich Nietzsche |
#384
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Well, you know Easter's around the corner when old threads start resurrecting.:D
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By the time you're twenty-five they will say you've gone and blown it. By the time you're thirty-five I must confide you will have blown them all |
#385
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Do you know why you kill people roman? DO YOU??
"don't wanna hear it sidney!!" BECAUSE YOU FUCKING CHOOSE TO there is no explanation!! "Damn it shut up shut the fuck UP!" Why don't you just take some FUCKING responsibility and.. "fuck you!" no FUCK YOU!! ^Scream3, sidney vs roman. I just love seeing Neve Verbally assault the killer :) "did you really call the cops sidney?.... My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at meee!" ^Scream "Oh honestly how does one suck a fuck?"
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None of this is real |
#386
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#387
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OK, I'll start nice...
"God, please help me to be the person my dog thinks I am." "If I wanted to listen to an asshole, I'd fart" (I know I 've used that one before) "Lick my plate, you dog dick" - Choptop (Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2) aka Bill Moseley, ya know the guy who is OTIS!!!!
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"There is no fuckin' ice cream in your fuckin' future." -Otis "Once in a while ya get shown the light, in the strangest of places if ya look at it right." -RH&JG "Do your best, fuck the rest." -Me "Onward, through the fog..." -Me |
#388
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"omg omg, there's someone upstairs!!"
(friend on phone) Kill kill kill kill kill, die die die die die! "SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Scary movie 2 "as we goooo on, we rememberrrr, all the timesss we, had togetherrrrr!" ~interrupted by singer on radio~ "hey, shut the FUCK UP and let me sing"
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None of this is real |
#389
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I've quoted this before... a looooong time ago...maybe in this thread, but I'm going to quote it again.
From "Better Off Dead," possibly John Cusak's best movie... Charles LaMarr to Lane Meyers (John Cusak)... "Lane, I've been at this high school for seven and a half years. Now, I'm no dummy. I know high school." By the way, Alky, isn't that just a great movie? God, there's nothing like a Mel Brooks film when you're depressed. I just realized that this thread was specifically for quotes from horror movies. The afore mentioned movie is not, in fact, a horror movie and neither is Blazing Saddles. Well, into everyone's life a little random must fall.
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By the time you're twenty-five they will say you've gone and blown it. By the time you're thirty-five I must confide you will have blown them all Last edited by Haunted; 05-03-2006 at 05:23 PM. |
#390
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Bah....
Catherine: Go to hell! Gabriel: Heaven, darling. Heaven. At least get the zip code right. Catherine: It's all the same to you, isn't it? Gabriel: No. In heaven, we believe in love. Catherine: What do you love, Gabriel? Gabriel: Cracking your skull.
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I will bathe the starways in your blood. |
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