Rambo

[Peter A]

The original Rambo movie (First Blood) is my favourite action film of all time. I also hold the first sequel in high regards as well.

I don't particularly mind 3 either, but it's kind of silly in many ways that anybody can survive being blasted at on sand, by tanks, choppers, and whatnot. But it was a fine way to end at least the '80s flicks. The fourth film without Richard Crenna made it feel like it wasn't really a Rambo movie. But I'd say it's more of a Rambo movie than the fifth and final film, is.

I think the fourth movie could have ended Rambo's ordeal kind of perfectly, with a happy send off. After all, he went back to America. He was encouraged to go back home, following a big war in Burma where he killed pretty much every scumbag there. It would have wrapped up things nicely had they left things alone. In the cinema back in 2008, I felt like I'd said farewell to my childhood hero. Sylvester Stallone also returned to the ring as Rocky Balboa in 2006, so I also assumed that was the last time we'd see him playing Rocky as well. But nope. We got the two Creed films over the last several years as well, which I'll admit, are okay-ish movies. Seeing Ivan Drago again was really cool.

They then decided to use a cancelled concept for the fifth Rambo movie, making it into more of a Taken type movie, which made it seem like even less of a Rambo adventure, and more so a generic revenge thriller with Rambo in the mix, but it in theory, could be any other protagonist. Rambo doesn't even talk of his past, like with his colonel, nor does it really seem like Sly is even portraying Rambo in this movie. Nothing exciting really occurs in the film either, for much of the movie's running time. It's just these generic bad guys speaking in Spanish, and abusing women, including a girl who became Rambo's adopted kid between this film and the last one from 12 years back. Sly kills a bunch of them in a brothel and you get some fake CGI blood. Wow.

Rambo also doesn't really save anybody except like two people he finds caught out in a storm, that I don't even have included in my copy of the movie, since the UK release omitted it anyway, which also goes against Rambo's helpful nature, in a sense. He then has PTSD issues where he is seen in front of a mirror popping pills, and claims he "never saves people". Again, that's all crap and lies from his persona's standpoint, considering he saved a lot of war prisoners in Vietnam, his best friend in Afghanistan, and the medical assistants he initially disliked, when he was living in Burma. He just lures the cardboard Mexican villains to his ranch at the end, after rigging the tunnels below his property with traps, then kills them in a gruesome way, and he sits back in a rocking chair at his house afterwards, badly wounded, mumbling, and looking all depressed as we get an aerial shot with a slightly reworked score.

During the end credits, we're treated to a slow motion montage of every Rambo film, including this one, which I guess was touching and very much appropriate. He is seen getting back up though, despite having a gaping bloody hole in his side. He smiles and jumps on his horse, riding off presumably for good. I mean, what the hell man, times a hundred?

Sorry, but the movie kind of sucks in many ways. It's not what I'd call an unwatchable film, but there was really no point to it being released, besides being another cash grab, kind of like the recent Resident Evil remakes that Capcom has been churning out too. He also doesn't have the scar on one of his cheeks, which he got in the second film from when that huge Russian bodyguard burned his face with a hot knife, which was even shown in the other movies. Did they forget about adding it in here? Uh!

Anyway, I'm glad in a way that Sly has retired both Rocky and Rambo. He's just too old now for doing any more action roles in general, but I'm glad that on a personal level, Sly at least got to achieve his goal of retiring his run as these characters on his own terms. Arnold Schwarzenegger would be as well to retire his Terminator role while he's at it, as it's becoming so embarrassing to see an old age pensioner as a cyborg with dull plot points ruining that franchise.

By the way, I found Sly as an extra in many films over the past several years, and the people running IMDb didn't believe it was him, or they needed more evidence that was more official than what I presented to them on their support forums. I've gave up trying, and they messed up his page. The IMDb GetSatisfaction forums didn't exactly leave me feeling... all that satisfied, you could say.

Peter A.