HDC Weekly Debate #1 - Is it OK for parents to monitor their kids' activities?

[ferretchucker]

I put no for one reason and that is this.

I think parents should play an important role in their childrens lives and should keep and eye on what they're doing, but then there are the parents who would take that too far and just make an all around invasion of privacy. I was watching a programme the other day called the cotton wool kids. One of the parents was so focused on keeping an eye on her daughter, she put a tracking chip into her! A chip under her skin so she could know where she was anytime she wanted! So I'm in between but I thought I'd better pick no because of that.

[GorePhobia]

Well there is a fine line between checking up on their kids and just blatantly spying on them just like Rod said.

[illdojo]

Originally Posted by urgeok2

I've said this before - but most of the kids acting like gangsters are kids who's parents take little or no roll in their childrens lives.

especially single parents. 2 parents trying to raise a kid can be tough enough - let alone 1.

I know shit happens and not all single parents planned things to be that way - i'm just saying it's really hard to be there for a kid when you're earning the bread by yourself.

then there are the kids who are the children of other kids. teenage pregnancy is no doubt the largest contributer to creating little career criminals there is.

no one to set an example, no one to give a shit.


do i monitor my kid ? .. not really - he's too young and i doubt that we ever will need to even when he's older.
We're very involved in our sons life - and we have a 100% open and honest relationship with him.

I'm not saying we dont make mistakes .. every parent - even the best ones - do, but all the signs are looking good so far. He can be a handful with a pretty severe case of ADHD ... but he's bright, funny, kind, sensitive and loving ...
I'm pretty sure he's going to do great - and we're proud of him.

Well said, and good job raising your child, Urge. :cool:

[Doc Faustus]

Usually, good parents don't have children who download bestiality and sacrifice babies to Satan the moment they turn their backs. Modern America seems to think they do. If you raise your children, listen to them and make sure they don't hang out with gun toting ruffians they'll probably turn out okay. Even if they happen to see breasts at some point.

[Dude Guadalupe]

It really is a mixture of positive influence and involvment. Monitoring can be a unsettling word, people think of privacy invasion when they hear it. But you have to know what they do at least some of the time, and if you have done your job right, you can trust them to make the right decisions on their own the rest of the time.

It doesn't take a whole lot. My parents were just wrong on many levels and I could have easily been one of those kids you hear about on the news. I mean, I did a lot of things I'm not proud of but it could have been worse.

All it took was one person (my grandma) to be a positive influence, to show me right and wrong, and to let me know that somebody gave a shit. Once you get those basics worked out, everything else kinda falls into place. It did for me anyway, and hopefully it will work the same way with my kids.

[_____V_____]

There seems to be a fine line there.

How MUCH monitoring can be actually considered monitoring without invasion of privacy or being touted as surveillance? Remember, once a kid gets the vibes that he is under scrutiny, he might get more rebellious.

I think its a very delicate balance. The future of the entire relationship between parents and children hangs in the balance.

[Despare]

I'm not a parent yet so I'll let you know then. I do however think that children are privy to very little real privacy. I'm not going to go to the old "my house my rules, you have no privacy" extreme but I do believe that monitoring through staying involved in their life as much as possible is the way to go. I guess my thought is a little more old school than most though. I'll never be the parent whose seven year old has a cell phone or who has the thirteen year old with no curfew who doesn't have to touch base at home before spending the weekend at a friends. I also won't be the dad who invites his son and his son's friends to share a joint. I've seen a lot of parents like that and while each person is free to parent the way they see fit I just don't agree with it. It may seem like I'm drifting off topic but really I'm trying to illustrate how my feelings on children and privacy may be a little older and less popular than the views of most.

[newb]

I have nothing much to add that hasn't been said....I have four great kids who haven't given me an ounce of trouble. I never really "monitored" my kids but I have been very much a part of their lives and kept close tabs on them without being intrusive.