View Single Post
  #9  
Old 08-07-2007, 10:28 PM
massacre man's Avatar
massacre man massacre man is offline
Get ahold of yourself.
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: South County, Maryland.
Posts: 10,044
Send a message via AIM to massacre man
*Back at the morgue, Massacre Man has his hands over his head just as Faustus leaves, he pulls himself out from under the table and eases himself up the stairs, as he's at the door Roderick and Newb stand up*

Massacre Man: Why the fuck couldn't you be Romero zombies?

*Massacre Man closes the door and crawls to the room he was originally captured in, sees the door to the exit, but then looks over into the TV room*

Massacre Man: God damn it.

*He pulls himself to the TV room and onto the couch*

Massacre Man: Still didn't miss the Crypt Keeper.

*He looks over and sees a blood-stained fireplace poker sitting on the floor next to yet another victim of old chicken salad sandwich eating fucker, and holds it for a few moments, concentrating on the TV, as soon as the zombies enter the room he pierces both of their stomachs and pins them to the wall as he waits for the commercials to end, the zombies moan at him*

Massacre Man: Shut the fuck up.

*The zombies slowly ease off of the poker, the commercials finally end as a new episode begins, midway through the intro an emergency news bulletin appears*

News Announcer: This is an HDC-station special report, we go onto the scene with our Info-Man, _V_

Massacre Man: WHAT THE FUCK!?

_V_: Thanks, Gus. Here I am at the ShankS Memorial Mental Institution where an outbreak of zombism has taken over the building, though the outbreak hasn't started yet, I am, as always giving you the news before any of the competitors. You will hear the first gunshot in... 3... 2... 1

*Sound of gunshot inside of the building, Faustus and Dojo are seen entering the asylum, Massacre Man looks at Dojo wide-eyed*

Massacre Man: That's... The fucker I was in the basement with! How the fuck did he get out?

_V_: But I can tell you now that the only survivor will be Doc Faustus who managed to use all of the others inside as bait for the zombies to lure them into traps, though we are still in danger as the monkey who caused the outbreak *picture of Zero is shown* has escaped and makes the likeliness of another outbreak very high.

*Massacre Man sees Dojo run out of the asylum and take off the mask*

Massacre Man: Oh... If I can't watch Tales From The Crypt...

*Massacre Man slips off of the chair and crawls to the door, he can't reach the knob*

Massacre Man: A little closer... come on... you asshole...

*He gets ahold of the door knob but slips off, after his second attempt he manages to pull the door open, he eases his way back to the campsite, he sees the car that Faustus drove smash into the cafeteria, Dojo leaps out of the car*

Dojo: TAKE THAT YOU DEAD BITCH!

*Massacre Man is relieved to see his friend, he has a smile on his face as he pulls himself forward*

Massacre Man: DOJO!

*Dojo looks over, his eyes widen, smoke slowly starts to come out of the car*

Dojo: What the fuck happened to you?

Massacre Man: *laughing* It's a long fuckin' story, think you got time?

Dojo: Sure man.

*The car catches fire and it begins to spread*

Dojo: Hold on.

*Dojo runs into the cafeteria and reemerges a few moments later holding his bong, escaping just before the cafeteria collapses*

Dojo: Alright, go on. Should I call an ambulance or something?

Massacre Man: No dude, I'm fine.

Dojo: Ok...

Massacre Man: Are you fucking retarded? Of course I want a fucking ambulance.

Dojo: Alright.

*Dojo pulls his cellphone out of his pocket and dials "911"*

Dojo: *Sarcastically and calm, imitating Massacre Man* Yes, I need a fucking ambulance for my fucking friend because he's in a fucking bad shape.

Massacre Man: Fuck you!

Dojo: Yeah, we're at Camp Chopuhpaula-View, his feet are gone and... he doesn't have feet. Oh yeah, he has holes in elbows and knees. Thanks, bye.

*Dojo hangs up and sits next to Massacre Man*

Dojo: They're coming.

Massacre Man: Fuckin' A.

Dojo: So what's the story.

Massacre Man: We were coming back to get you, we walked into a house, some asshole killed Rod and...

Dojo: Wait, Rod's dead?

Massacre Man: No, he's undead now.

Dojo: So... he's alive?

Massacre Man: No, he's a zombie.

Dojo: What?

Massacre Man: Just... don't fuckin' worry about it, we're not hanging out with him anymore.

Dojo: Should we tell his mom?

Massacre Man: I'm not... she got pissed off when I kicked a hole in her TV, imagine the shit she'll say when I tell her I got her fuckin' son killed.

Dojo: I'm not gonna tell her, I don't wanna see her cry.

Massacre Man: Pussy...

*The ambulance arrives, they put Massacre Man in the back and leave Dojo at the camp, he watches the ambulance drive off as the zombies of Rod and Newb stumble through the woods in the distance behind Dojo*


THE END?


NO, NOT YET.

*Massacre Man is in the back of the ambulance, he looks at the back window and sees Zero looking at him through it*

*Screen goes black, the only sound is Massacre Man's voice*

Massacre Man: FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK!


NOW IT'S THE END

Last edited by _____V_____; 11-27-2009 at 06:32 AM.
Reply With Quote