I suppose another silver lining in all of this is it has given me some insight on what I do wrong. I mean I'm sure I came off a little strong in the beginning because That's just how I am and I can't help it. I'm like a lost puppy dog and when someone comes to claim me I am all over them. I can accept responsibility for being a little do straightforward and probably even scaring some women in the past but that doesn't mean women can act like they are so genuinely interested in me but keeps secrets from me even when I am asking about them and clearly letting her know that it is concerning me and bothering me.
this woman is an emotional vampire who only seems to be interested in attention and sucking every little bit out of it they can before they are discovered and have to discard their victim or plaything and move on to someone else like a hungry spider just waiting to tangle their prey in their web so they can suck the life out of them. People like that have absolutely no remorse and no feelings for anyone other than themselves because they are too selfish to care about anyone else.
It is unfortunate that The only place I feel comfortable trying to meet people is on the internet but that has always been my downfall. I mean Las Vegas is the first place I have ever lived where I have an opportunity to get out and start trying to build a social life and honestly it scares me because I am so socially awkward and have very little Charisma but I know stuff like that comes with experience. These are things I should have learned years ago but I was never Exposed to such experiences.
so the silver lining in all of this is it has taught me that I need to stop listening to let women on the internet tell me who act like they are interested in me and take the advice I gave LP a while back and start getting out and going to the places where the kind of women hang out at that I would be interested in since the bar scene isn't really for me and I'm not a one-night-stand kind of guy. I should totally start Larkin the libraries and comic shop haha. in case you guys haven't noticed I like nerdy goth girls.
Somebody seriously should give me a swift kick in the face with a steel towed boot and tell me to stop procrastinating like a little bitch and get back to working on my novel. I don't know why I'm putting it off because I think it's a wonderful idea but Something is preventing me from starting it and I don't know what or why.
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